Young Snot Gets Indignant That I Won't Give Him Something For Nothing
My name is Eric and I'm a new advice columnist for the DELETED my local news paper. My editor will not let me write about any topic outside of Christianity. Though I am a devoted Christian and i love writing about that topic, I'm running out of idea. I was hoping you can help me out. I was reading your bio about how you have written award winning books. I was wondering if I can call you or keep in contact with you via email to get some information from you on how to become more of an experienced advice columnist. I am about to graduate with my BA in music. However I really want to write. I saw you are not a licenses psychologist. Neither am I nor will I be. I just want to help. This is my first year (not paid) as working as one. Is it okay with you to ask some information from you either through a phone call or through email? Thank you so very much for your time.
Sorry, Eric, I give business advice for a fee. I just can't afford to give free advice on topics I can't address in my column. I can do this by phone for a fee: http://www.advicegoddess.com/private-session.html
Friday morning, I get this back:
All I wanted to know was how you became so successful as an Advice Columnist with no psychology background or degree. I am new at this and I wanted inspiration to be someone like you out there helping others. But, I guess money is more important to you than helping. I know the economy is tough these days. I know all about that being fresh out of college. But, as an Advice Columnist, you should put helping people above a pay. I am doing this for free at my local newspaper for free (I have a big following as well) each week. Showing that email to my co-workers at the newspaper, too, they agree with my opinion at hand along with many other writers I work with outside the newspaper. I wanted to be like you after reading your articles and looking at the books you have published. But, after that email, you are the exact advice columnist I don't want to be. I want people to come to me knowing I will help them no matter what. I guess I am going to have to find a new inspiration. But, I will never stop what I do: having a want to help others no matter what. Thank you for all your time. I appreciate that much at least.
"But, I guess money is more important to you than helping"
I give a great deal of free advice every day to people whose questions will never make my column, but I need to limit the free advice I give or I'd never get any work done.
Money is very important to me because I need to pay my electric bill and rent in order to continue writing. I built a business and that's what you're looking to do -- but without valuing the time of those you're looking for advice from. You are irate that I will not give you my time for free. How obscene.
"But, as an Advice Columnist, you should put helping people above a pay."
I choose to give my time for free to inner city children and I looked after a homeless guy -- one who's integrated back into society now. I do not choose to give it to you, to tell you how you can become my competition. Imagine that!
You don't "appreciate my time." You're an insincere snot who wanted something for nothing from a total stranger and who was indignant at not getting it.
Go feed a homeless guy today to make up for trying to make me feel bad (and failing, by the way) for refusing to give you something for nothing.
And here's some advice: Nobody owes you anything. And by treating them as if they do, you won't get anything out of it from them but disdain.
Also, regarding the opinion of your coworkers, popular opinion does not trump having values. A pity you don't know that and think this is a valid argument.
Being the sort of person the email above reflects -- entitled, bratty, and immature -- you have no business giving advice to anyone. Read some Krishnamurti -- Freedom from the Known -- and work on that ratty interior of yours.
And don't sign "best wishes" when you don't mean it.
On a related note, I was just talking with a girlfriend about how important we both think it is to mentor younger people (when I was in New York, this wonderful man, then a copywriter at an ad agency, was a mentor and friend to me). My girlfriend and I both do this with a few younger people in our lives. But again, I choose to give these people my time because they mean something to me; they don't demand it.