How To Make A Potential Employee Live To Ruin Your Company
I dealt with this sort of "call anytime!" stonewalling in the excerpt below from the op-ed editor of a big paper, who sat on a book-related op-ed I wrote for almost four months.
I sent it to him -- with his permission -- a week and a half before my book came out. He kept promising to read it "this weekend," or "this weekend," and apologizing -- and then engaging in the same pledge to read and disappearo over and over.
He even did this after he had me do work on the piece, which he ultimately passed on -- a month after I did the work and he then ignored me repeatedly again. Finally, I tricked him into picking up the phone, which is how I heard that he was passing.
Pro Tip: If you call from a blocked number, they wonder whether it might be a celebrity: "George Clooney?" "Hi, no...Amy Alkon!"
Now, I know that the guy didn't owe me the publication of my piece -- far from it. But it was the indecency of the treatment that got me: being told over and over that he'd behave differently and then never having that happen. This gave me a lot of upset and a number of nights where I woke up at 3 a.m., all upset or worried and trying to strategize.
Really, if the guy had simply said from the start, "Hey, I'm too busy; send this to the slush pile address," I would have, no biggie. But he never did.
The upshot: Where I am normally quick to shrug off slights (and, in fact, joke that I have a mind like a steel sieve), I now live for the day I will meet somebody from his paper and tell them all about the way he treats people. And I'm not the only one, as I, not surprisingly, heard subsequently.
On a related note, there's a smart piece at Harvard Biz Review by Anne Kreamer on "The Rise of the Rude Hiring Manager:
A culture of rudeness. Rachel, a 60-year-old former news producer turned freelance marketer, was introduced by a friend to the CEO of "a fast growing 'deep content' company with clients like GE and Xerox." The company seemed like a good fit for Rachel's portfolio of skills, and employed a large staff of experienced journalists, artists, and web designers. After a brief phone conversation, the CEO wanted to meet with Rachel "ASAP." During their first in-person conversation, Rachel and he discovered shared viewpoints, and after talking for an hour, the CEO asked Rachel to meet with his editorial VP. But first, the CEO gave Rachel his card. "This is my direct line," he said, "and I return every call on this line. Call me by the end of the week." Rachel did as requested. Six weeks later, after several awkward interactions with the CEO's assistant, he finally took Rachel's call.CEO: "Hi Rachel, I'm too busy to talk today."
Rachel: "I understand --maybe Monday?"
CEO: "Well, I can't commit to that right now, either. And I need to tell you, it doesn't inspire me that you've been calling so much."
Rachel: "On the day we met you asked me to call you two days later. That was six weeks ago. I've called less than once a week."
CEO: "Well, every time you call your name doesn't go to the to top of the list - it moves to the bottom! This doesn't mean I've lost interest in you and your work, but it's not cool to do what you're doing."
Rachel: "I understand. I won't call again. Thank you."
The colleague who set up the initial contact told Rachel: "There is no bad intent here -- like me, he gets 300 emails a day and works 18-hour days across five continents. It's not personal."
I wrote a book about emotion in the workplace called It's Always Personal. And no matter what others say, it nearly always is. People hiring today have precious little time to read, process information, and respond to even urgent issues like staffing. But this comes at great peril to their organizations and to the rude employer. Instead of fostering good will among the prospective hires they interview, enemies like I-live-to-see-this-company-destroyed Martin are made.
Kreamer's piece is smart, and her book looks smart, too, so I'm getting a copy and will have her on my radio show soon.
Happened to me just once. I applied for a job at a software company about ten years ago. They wanted me to complete a design first. I wouldn't be considered for an interview unless I did.
I did a quick effort estimates, saw that it was about 20-30 hours of work, and politely turned them down. Got a decent job a few weeks later elsewhere, for more money, with a 30-min interview.
I don't work for free.
V-Man at November 21, 2014 9:52 AM
I'll definitely have to check out that book. And I have to say, you're a lot more persistent than I would have been -- I suppose it's the nature of your profession, but I would have thrown in the towel after two or three aggressive no-answers. I think that the kind of people who do that are borderlines -- an hour is as long as they can be civil towards someone.
Cousin Dave at November 21, 2014 9:54 AM
I needed to give the op-ed a shot there, where in some other situation, I would have been on my way. In this case, because it was important for my book, I just couldn't afford to say, "I'm not taking this abuse."
Amy Alkon at November 21, 2014 9:58 AM
V-Man: It's a tough call. I totally understand not working for free. However, there's another side to it.
I periodically have to send out a requirements catalog and ask companies to make offers.
If a company sends in an offer that basically contains a rehash of their sales brochures, it goes straight into the trash. They didn't spend any time thinking about the project and how they might solve it. I have no basis to evaluate their skills, or their approach to the project.
The company that gets the contract is the one that shows they've understood the requirements, spotted the tricky bits, have ideas what they might to do solve them, and explain all this in the offer. That takes time, but it tells me "these guys know what they're doing".
So...two sides to that coin...
a_random_guy at November 21, 2014 10:34 AM
It's very simple.... If you are busy, I get it. Civility doesn't take that much more time than rudeness. How hard is dropping a txt from a smartphone saying, got your message and been busy, sorry. Showing respect for someone, is courteous. As is giving a hard, I'm not interested right now. And, an Exec that cannot be civil to Employees or prospective employees because they are too busy, has done a bad job of hiring in the first place and needs to hire more and get a better Assistant. There's no excuse, you're Employees should be proud to work for you, not ashamed because your are a rude asshole.
Lee Ladisky at November 21, 2014 12:10 PM
You're = your
Lee ladisky at November 21, 2014 12:11 PM
Don't worry, Lee, at least you didn't say "should of." That's been really annoying me lately.
When people speak it, they are saying "should've," which is a contraction for "should have." There is no such thing as "should of" or "could of" and people who post it look like they need to go back and repeat fifth grade.
I have never corrected anyone's grammar or spelling online - that's just annoying. Instead, I rage and fume silently.
Pirate Jo at November 21, 2014 1:32 PM
Amy Alkon
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2014/11/21/how_to_make_a_p.html#comment-5532761">comment from Pirate Jo"Should of" makes my teeth hurt.
Amy Alkon at November 21, 2014 1:36 PM
Grrr. My husband's friend is constantly trying to get editing work out of me for free. I'm constantly politely declining. FFS, at least offer me a drink.
MonicaP at November 21, 2014 7:45 PM
Amy Alkon
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2014/11/21/how_to_make_a_p.html#comment-5535279">comment from MonicaPHow rude of him, MonicaP.
Don't people understand that there's still a price? Instead of the decent thing, paying or at least offering to buy you a meal or something, the cost is to his reputation.
Amy Alkon at November 21, 2014 10:21 PM
Sort of like the way I stopped taking care of my family's computers, except for my wife and the kids. "No, I can't just quickly fix that mess you've made - it will pretty much eat my weekend." No one wanted to hear that, so eventually I just started saying "no".
@MonicaP: If you would, in principle, be willing to edit the texts for some sort of compensation, then your hubby needs to have a quiet word with his friend. "Hey, Joe, look, that's how she earns her living. It's not fair to ask her to do it for free. The going rate is $X." Otherwise, just be firm, and keep saying "no".
a_random_guy at November 22, 2014 1:34 AM
Two points.
First point. Some people seem more sensitive now a days. Just telling people "no" or "later" or "can't do" at times sets them off. I mean really sensitive like that you have mortally wounded their ego or insulted them. Thus people get sort of stuck beating around the bush to avoid given that basic negative answer. Often that circular route ends up getting the person stuck or stalled.
Now me I can take some bluntness all I ask is person words it nicely the first time. If I continue to not get the message then they can be a bit ruder. You want me to go now after this nice evening. Ok tell me and go. Politely.
More often then naught it is the opposite the way people deal with it is either give up and let the person take them hostage. Come on you have been talking with a person on the phone and you need to go, but you know saying go away nicely will just bring grief and drama.
Or the person develops techniques to avoiding dealing with people like not returning calls.
Second point. As to the helping and/or free work. I get that sometimes. Help mark some papers. Or help me with my computer. Now I might do it as a favor and for karma. Through some stipulations will be set. I do it my way. If you don't like it - pay to get it done YOUR way. Next, you will make the effort to accommodate me. If lucky it will be half way but for free you might have go further towards me. So you might be the one that comes to my place to have that computer look at. Don't have high expectations on quality, timing, success, etc. You get what you get.
Even after those are set, I do sometimes get screwed with or taken advantage.
John Paulson at November 22, 2014 2:31 AM
At a job interview, I was told that the specifics of the position weren't yet known, and I was told that this was my opportunity to come up with some ideas for what such a job might entail. When I replied that I was actually hoping to learn precisely that at the interview, and would have to be more familiar with the organization's needs, etc. (I phrased it politely), I saw the two interviewers give each other a look. I realized that they wanted me to do free consulting for them after having been there for 20 minutes. I didn't get the job.
I checked the company website every week or so thereafter and found nearly 100% turnover within a few months.
Sue at November 22, 2014 6:47 AM
What Sue saw happens at most places that want free work in or before an interview. And the software industry is particularly bad about that as V-Man can attest.
And to respond to a_random_guy, there is a world of difference between asking for free work from someone interviewing for a standard employer-employee position and asking companies to do their due diligence before bidding on a project.
Ben at November 23, 2014 6:15 PM
> Amy Alkon at November 21, 2014 1:36 PM
☑
Crid [CridComment at Gmail] at November 23, 2014 9:48 PM
a_random_guy: I wasn't bidding for a specific project, I was applying to a salaried job. I had many years of experience in that career, as well as a portfolio of published, demonstrated, successful software products.
They may not necessarily have wanted free work. It could have been a lazy hiring manager that's covering his ass and making 110% sure candidates can deliver.
They might also have been weeding out candidates with a spine. That company has a reputation for demanding massive unpaid overtime...
V-Man at November 24, 2014 9:43 AM
Here's what frosts my cookies: The CEO, after what sounds like a very promising interview, TOLD Rachel, "Call me by the end of the week."
She did exactly what he told her to do... and it took him six weeks to finally be willing to face her and tell her, "That's a turnoff."
WTF? It's WHAT YOU TOLD ME TO DO! How is that sending me to the bottom of the list?
Beth at November 24, 2014 1:46 PM
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