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Stunning On Empty
I am a 44-year-old man, in between jobs. For once, I want the best-looking
woman, because all my life, women I've been involved with have been just
so-so. Unfortunately, I have a hard time speaking when I'm around beautiful
women. I'm so desperate -- I know there's some secret to meeting and picking
up wild, gorgeous beauties who enjoy sex and romance, and I'm hoping you'll
tell me what it is. By the way, if women respond to this message, you have my
permission to give them my address and phone number. Please help me get a
babe.
--Hungry Heart
LET ME GET THIS straight: "Unemployed mute seeks nymphomaniac centerfold.
(Only the independently wealthy need apply.)"
Excuse me while I brace myself for the flood of email from international
supermodels begging me to set up a series of catfights to decide which one
will get to buy you dinner for the rest of your life.
If only you were willing to settle for a girl with inner beauty. There might
actually be a few out there who'd let you wash their windows in exchange for
a hot meal or two, maybe more. Then again, maybe just the right job is the
key to attaining your dream -- getting some gorgeous meow-kitty centerfold to
pay attention to you, and maybe even whisper sweet nothings in your ear --
stuff like, "Filler up, cutie-pie."
Copyright ©2002, Amy Alkon, from her syndicated column,
"The Advice Goddess," which appears in over 70 papers across the U.S. and
Canada. All rights reserved.
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