Movie Theaters
There are the jerks who whip out their BlackBerry, and I want to know why people drop their food wrappers and cups on the floor instead of enduring that terrible struggle to drop them in a trash can four feet from the exit. And I want to know what bugs the hell out of you, too, in the movie theater.
Comments
Many things:
People who bring three-year-olds to the Tuesday 9pm showing of an R-rated movie, and then talk to them all the way through it. Or better yet, bring a baby in a carrier and then act surprised when it starts to cry halfway through the movie.
People who can't STFU and watch the movie - seriously, if you wanted to have a running commentary, WAIT FOR THE DVD.
People who have to get up every ten minutes (and why do they ALWAYS sit in the middle of the row?). Again, if you can't sit still for two hours, WAIT FOR THE DVD.
The best story I ever heard was from my boyfriend's brother, though. He went to see Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, which has subtitles. Some asshat father brought his toddler to the movie...and read the subtitles to him. *headdesk*
Posted by: Ann at August 31, 2010 4:11 PM
5 things, mainly:
1. Your Blackberry/iPhone/Droid is backlit. The movie theater is dark. This means that when you hold your screen up in a dark theater, it draws attention. This is distracting and rude, and the only possible excuse is that you're in a profession that requires emergency e-mail responses. Even then, try to cover up the screen or sit off to the side.
2. Your 3-5 year old child is too young to understand King Kong, Iron Man 2, or Scott Pilgrim vs. the World. Do not take him to theater. If you believe your child to be mature enough to sit quietly, and he/she doesn't, remove him or her from the theater.
3. We are not interested in your thoughts on the movie, unless it's a midnight showing of something like "The Room", "Birdemic", or "The Rocky Horror Picture Show". Do not talk during the movie, no matter how witty you think you are. Save that for home, where your friends are more willing to put up with it.
4. Movie theaters are supposed to have rules of audience conduct, like "don't talk loudly during the movie" or "take the screaming baby out of the theater." When they don't, I stop patronizing them.
5. If there are people sitting in the seats in front of you, don't use the seats as a footrest or kick them. This should be obvious, but...
Posted by: Brian at August 31, 2010 7:54 PM
I was recently watching a movie that got some very bad reviews (I liked it but that is beside the point) and a guy there apparently showed up just to heckle the movie. Throughout the first 45 minutes or so he continually berated the director, the actors, and anything else he could think of. I politely asked him to please keep it down and he looked at me like I was crazy. Finally I looked straight at the woman who was with him and said "Could you please shut him up." That finally got through because for the first time she seemed to realize that his poor behavior reflected on her as well. It turns out a woman having sex with you has a lot more influence than some random stranger and he didn't make a peep for the rest of the movie.
Posted by: Katebo at September 1, 2010 5:33 AM
Kids who sneak into R-rated movies and then spend the entire time talking and giggling about how cool they are to have gotten in. This has happened to me three or four times that I remember. The best (or worst, I guess) was when a group of women from my work went to see Sex and the City a couple of years ago. We're a few minutes in and a group of fifteen-year-old boys and girls comes in and they're already laughing. Then they spend the entire movie, including the naked and sex stuff, texting each other. They were the least rude of the times I've seen this happen (they were mostly quiet), but it's hilarious to me that you sneak into a movie and then don't watch it. And there's nudity! And sex! And nudity! That one was for Gilles Marini, which was totally worth the price of admission.
I thank the Gods I was never like that. The only movie I ever sneaked into (well, not really sneaked, because I just bought a ticket at the Fandango machine) was State and Main with a group of friends, most of whom were not yet eighteen. And we laughed more than the adults in the theater.
Posted by: NumberSix at September 1, 2010 8:46 AM
The rudest thing I ever saw was at a live theatre event. One of the stage moms was helping get the sell-out crowd seated. My friend who is in a wheelchair had transferred into a seat on the aisle and his chair was folded up by his side. She looked at him, looked at the chair, looked at the people lined up looking for seats, and said, to me (as if my friend wasn't there): "Let's get him out of the way up here" and gestured toward an aisle that had a dead space at the far end.
My friend was pretty gracious about it, and I never cast that Stage Mom's kid again (I was the director of the show. Hah.)
Posted by: Brian Jones at September 1, 2010 4:31 PM
People talking is a big one. Kids in R rated movies. Candy throwing. But the one that absolutely drives me nuts is the people (or kids) that put their feet up on my chair (bump, bump, bump) or between the seats on the arm rest.
One time I went to go see a movie with my best guy-friend. He was class clown our Sr. year of HS. This guy was so funny, he would make me laugh so hard I could hardly breath. Anyway, we were at a movie theater and some kid had one of those laser pointers - with the red spotlight. Started shooting it up on the screen during the movie trailers and him and his friends were laughing and making jokes.
I looked at my friend and said "I really hope they don't keep doing that when the film starts." These kids were like 5 rows ahead of us. So my friend, shouts.... (I think this was one of those "you had to be there moments") "Dude, that is, like, so 1992". The entire theater went up in applause and laughter. No more laser beam. The kid looked super embarrassed.
Posted by: Feebie at September 1, 2010 9:39 PM
I had gum thrown into my hair during a movie once. No joke! Someone several rows back apparently thought chunking their gum across the theatre was the appropriate way to dispose of it.
Posted by: Ashley at September 2, 2010 4:43 PM
At a movie once, I had a large group of women come in and sit about 3 rows in front of me. Everything was fine, except for some light talking, until about 45 minutes into the movie. At that point, one end of the row started whispering excitedly and shifting around. Next thing you know, I see flames - and then a fully lit birthday cake appears, followed by standing and the loud refrains of "Happy Birthday". It was unreal. I left and went to the manager to ask for a refund. He didn't believe me, until he walked into the theater and saw them passing out plates of cake. He said they had cups of punch too. Somewhat surprisingly, he let them stay instead of kicking them out (for smuggling in food), and just gave me my money back.
Posted by: vaughan at September 2, 2010 11:25 PM
I went to see "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire". There were a lot of kids and teenagers in the audience. That was fine and expected. Everyone was excited. Even I was. I like the books. I like the movies.
The pre-views came on. No one would shut up. The movie started. No one would shut up. The first scene was over. No one would shut up. The movie theater stopped the movie, turned on the lights, and told everyone to shut up or get out.
Reminded me when I was on a 5th grade school trip to Hayden's Planetarium. This was before the renovation. In the Theater were lots of other classes from other schools. Must have been some special educational thing. No one would shut up. The show started. No one would shut up. Management stopped the show, and turned on the lights. Back then, when you enter the Theater before the show it was relatively dark. The lights were dim and the big screen was in purple light. Management turned on all the lights. Everything was bright. The screen lights were off, and you could see its natural white and the panel edges. They told everyone to shut up or get out.
Posted by: hadsil at September 4, 2010 7:44 PM
I think this event goes straight past rude and into abusive. This past Sunday afternoon I went with my father to see the newest Resident Evil. While I grant you that when going to a matinée you should expect little ones somehow I din't imagine I would see them at an R rated movie (naive of me I know.) So I walk in and see a couple with a child of about 3 and an infant and while I am bothered that they would bring such small children to such a violent movie I also realize that I have no say. The bad part is about halfway through the movie the 3 year old get really frightened, he is a crying and begging to go home. Just as I turn around to offer and take him out so his mother can continue to watch his mother hauls off and slaps him. She then tells him to "Shut the @#!* up and stop being such a baby." I was in complete shock, I didn't know how to react but my dad sure did. He stood up turned around and told the woman that she should be ashamed of the way she treated her children and told the father he should be ashamed of the way he let his wife treat his children. He then proceeded to reporting them to the manager who called security and had them escorted out.
Posted by: Katebo at September 14, 2010 5:44 PM
This wasn't the movies but...a few years ago I took my son (aged about 9) to the circus. When we booked tickets I was told that there was no allocated seating, and to get there early for the best seats. So that's what we did and we got ringside seats. We enjoyed the first part of the show and at intermission went outside so my son could have a go at the laughing clowns and whatever. Anyway, when we came back in and went back to our seats, lo and behold there was a young couple in their 20s sitting in the seats. I said (politely) "Excuse me, my son and I were sitting here", to which the young fellah replied "There are no allocated seats you know!" They both refused to move, despite much "tsskking" from others around them. Eventually another guy a few rows back gave up his seat for my son, and I watched the rest of the circus from behind a pole - no big deal for me, but I wondered what a couple of 20 somethings without kids were doing at the circus anyway - let alone taking a seat from a kid. Did they scope us out all during the first half of the show "When they get up, take their seats!! Ready, set....."
Posted by: LisaP at September 30, 2010 8:56 AM
My husband is in a wheelchair. Our favorite theater has a wheelchair aisle in the middle, with comfy chairs in pairs and space for the chair. We went to see one of the Harry Potter movies, and thank goodness a movie employee went with us. The handicapped chairs were occupied by two able-bodied preteens. The movie employee asked them to move, and their mother (sitting behind them in a regular aisle) snapped "I want my daughters where I can see them!" My jaw dropped. Fortunately I didn't have to say anything. their were 2 empty seats in that row, and the guy had everyone move to fill them so her daughters could sit next to her. Where did this bitch think my husband was going to sit? The top row? Unhandicapped people are frequently in these seats. It's maddening.
Posted by: marla at May 15, 2011 3:36 AM
i once went to a movie with my two high school friends, we were in our 20s at the time. there were three teenage girls behind us who talked the whole time - this does not actually bother me, since they were fairly quiet about it. the one girl, though, kicked my chair the entire movie, until after about an hour i turned around and grabbed her leg in mid-kick. i gave her the look. the look on her face was priceless, and she quit kicking me. i wish, however, that my friend had mentioned that the other girl kept throwing her nachos in my friend's hair - my friend is quite overweight, and in her case it actually is a medical problem, but either way it does not justify having food thrown at you. if i had known about it, i would have taken away the girl's nachos, since she clearly wasn't mature enough to handle eating food in public. and i would have told her so, too.
Posted by: me at June 19, 2011 10:47 AM
My husband, his best friend, another guy and I went to see an IMAX movie, it was sold out and we didn't get great seats, we didn't know just how terrible they were until the guy behind me's phone rang about 20 minutes into the movie. He answered it! And not to say "I'll call you back" in a hushed voice, no, he had a full blown conversation, ignoring all the shushing and the stink eye from those around him. Later, his phone rang again, this time he ignored it but he still didn't turn the ringer off. A minute or so later, it rang again. I turned around and asked him to put it on silent, he looked at me blankly. My husband's best friend was embarassed that I had said anything. BUT about 10 minutes later (only 30 minutes left in the movie, the 'good part') this same guy's phone rang AGAIN and he answered it again. My husband who had seen the movie went to get an employee and I let the guy have it, telling him and his whole family that he was one of the rudest people I have encountered in my whole life and that he was ruining the movie for every other person in the theatre, if the call was important he should have stepped out.
Another time, a group of tween/teen boys came into a movie and proceeded to cat call the tween girls sitting in our row, the girls acted all bashful and then shifted so the boys could sit in the seats next to them, instead of having split seats. The boys kept up the cat calls and the girls were all giggling. I turned to the boys, now sitting next to me and told them that if they kept it up during the movie I would have them removed from the theatre. All of the people around us nodded and clapped.
Posted by: geeh at January 4, 2012 7:14 PM
Yay for you! Someone has to speak up. And your husband's best friend should have been embarrassed that he didn't say anything. It's really important to support people who do speak up, as reputation concern is an evolved part of human consciousness and just a person saying, "Yeah, she's right" about somebody speaking up to a rude person is usually enough to silence or stop the person.
Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 4, 2012 7:29 PM
Stadium seating in movie theaters is very comfy -- but not all of us are tall enough so that our heads clear the high backs.
Please remember that, person behind me, when you help yourself stand by grabbing the back of the seat in front of you and jerking it backward as you stand, and again as you sit.
Or maybe I'm lost (happens) and I'm not in a movie theater, I'm on an amusement park ride and am meant to be whipped around four or five times per show.
Posted by: Beth at February 16, 2012 1:10 PM
Wow, Brian Jones, what a hero you are for penalizing a child for their mother's thoughtlessness. I hope it was worth it for you.
Posted by: G.J. at May 19, 2012 7:20 PM
My husband and I went recently to see "Lincoln." I expect the dialogue was very good.
But I'm not actually sure. The 60-ish-year-old woman next to me had a comment to make about every scene.
Not an occasional whisper in her husband's ear -- lengthy commentaries loud enough to drown out Daniel Day-Lewis, Sally Field, and Tommy Lee Jones.
If the theater hadn't been very full, I would have moved. Unfortunately, my periodic glances didn't seem to alert her that she was talking out loud throughout the whole movie.
Posted by: beth at January 8, 2013 7:09 PM
I was one of the first people to seat in a sold-out show. A group of friends in front of me started saving seats for what seemed like 20-30 people, by placing binders, jackets, anything they could find all around the surrounding seats. They realized, however, that they were still a few seats short, so they asked me to move. I looked around, and at that point, the theater had already filled up, so I simply said, "No, thanks." Then they treated me as if I were rude...
Anyhow, Amy, I'm not sure you are still looking for comments, but I just discovered your site recently and am loving it! Thanks for letting us vent about rude people.
Posted by: Louise at June 18, 2013 6:25 PM
Louise, you're leaving great comments -- I'm loving them! Just read the one about your phone company.
Posted by: Amy Alkon at June 18, 2013 8:19 PM
When people have sex in front of me
Posted by: jake at November 24, 2013 11:06 PM
People who leave trash all over the theater and don't have the courtesy to use a trash can.
Posted by: anonymous at July 14, 2014 6:03 AM
My mom once had gum put in her hair from some little kid behind her. Also one time, I went to see The Sound Of Music (I think) and there was this couple ahead of me that like kept leaning together to wisper. The seats were alternating each row. 10 in one row and 8 in the next. Then 10 again. I was in an 8 row. It was like ever 5 seconds they would lean together in between the seats to wisper. I just calmly went 1 row back. I also hate when the theatre is empty and of course 1 tall guy decides to sit in front of you.
Posted by: Sparky_321 at December 16, 2015 1:13 PM
My pet peeve in movie theaters are people who intentionally leave one empty seat between them instead of filling in. I went to the theater with my husband and it was nearly sold out. The theater was peppered with one seat here, one seat there, but no two seats together. A couple was seated 1 seat in from the aisle, one empty seat on on either side of them and the rest of the row full. I politely asked if those two seats were taken. They said "No". Then I politely asked if they could scoot over one seat so that hubby and I could sit together. The woman, thought about it for a bit, then matter of factly said "No". My hubby went and got an usher, and the usher asked the couple to scoot over and they did. Then the usher went around and helped other groups seat togehter, by asking people to move towards the center of the rows. I was plotting all sorts of revenge against this couple, like my husband and I sitting on either side of them and passing a big tub of buttered popcorn between us across both their smug little laps, and perhaps asking "Hey, do you guys mind if we make out ?" Lucky for them, the usher made them do the polite thing. I had all kinds of devilish plans if they didn't move !
Posted by: amethystheart at January 14, 2019 7:48 PM
Here’s some advice for the concession stand—please know what you plan on ordering before your turn approaches. If not, there will be long lines and possibly people missing the beginning of their chosen movies.
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