I haven't had a roommate (other than my dog) for a lot of years, so I really need your help. Lay your roommate rudenesses on me, and talk to me about what it takes to live well amongst others.
When I was in college, my roommate and I had a cold war. We were both pretty awful. She wanted the room spotless, and I was a mess, although I kept my mess to my side of the room. Not good enough for her. I was an even bigger mess on purpose, and she tried to freeze me out by leaving the windows open during February (at a school near the Canadian border). She claimed asthma. I wore six layers of clothing every night and nearly broke, but she eventually moved into her sorority house and I got a single.
Posted by: MonicaP
at September 1, 2010 7:55 PM
Roommates who allow their disgusting slob boyfriend to drink directly out of the milk jug held in one hand while scratching his naked balls with the other hand.
She moved out shortly thereafter. I figure my screams were still ringing in her ears as she loaded her stuff in her car.
Posted by: Juliana
at September 1, 2010 10:28 PM
Oh yes, the boyfriend-slob.
I came home once to my roommates boyfriend in his boxers, feet up on my coffee table, drinking out of my 2L soda bottle with his hand in his crotch. She was walking around doing choirs or something and didn't say a word.
I also had a roommate whose boyfriend came over every single weekend. Friday, Sat, Sunday for the three years I lived there. He would get up on Saturday mornings at 6:30am...run down the hall, bunny hop down the stairs only to catapult himself off of the third to the bottom onto the floor then start making a 5 course breakfast for himself. Clanging pots and pans. He'd leave everything in the sink too (she would clean it up).
He would also leave the toilet seat up. In the middle of the night once I went to use the toilet and didn't turn on the light (so as not to wake anyone) and fell right down into the bowl (gross!) I was so pissed, i grabbed the top of the lid and slammed it down. Every time I saw it up from then on I slammed it down (I have big time passive aggressive tendencies). He never got the hint. I finally moved out and got my own shoe-box sized studio. Ahhhh.
But boyfriends should behave like GUESTS when there are other roommates. They never do. And I think it is rude that this guy was over our house 12 days out of the month and didn't contribute anything to rent, electricity - etc. He was practically living there.
Posted by: Feebie
at September 1, 2010 10:38 PM
That was this charmer's problem as well; he lived in the same complex as us, yet spent every night over except the times he went home for visits. We roomies confronted her on the issue, so they thought he'd sneak in and out (her room was ground floor, sliding glass door) but we'd bust him anyway, great big noisy lumbering squish of flesh that he was.
When this charming couple (let's be honest, eh?) moved out, we had to go through each of her boxes before they went out the door. She'd decided to glean many items from us. In addition, her parents were helping her move out. Imagine her mother's humiliation as we'd bust her for each item she was trying to sneak out the door. She even tried to take textbooks from one of the good roomies, as they were in the same degree program.
Posted by: Juliana
at September 2, 2010 11:40 AM
Way back in the day, my roomie during my senior year of undergrad was a real piece of work. Her parents were paying her tuition and other expenses. She was supposed to be working to help cover her costs, but preferred to go to her boyfriend's (mom's) apartment off-campus and spend her afternoons snuggled up with him.
So one morning, a new CD I've been waiting for is in our mailbox. I pull it out, put it into my stereo, and start listening. There's time for one or two songs before I have to head out the door to class.
I come back just over an hour later, and the CD isn't in the stereo. I call her boyfriend's - sure enough, she wanted to play it for him, so she took it to his place! I asked her to bring it back on her way to work. She tells me she can't, because they were planning on going somewhere instead, and they didn't want to detour to campus.
I forget what it was I told her that convinced her to very grudgingly drop off the CD 15 or 20 minutes later.
Posted by: jen
at September 3, 2010 8:14 PM
Two different roommates in college.
I had a particular room first. I was alone in the room for a month then he moved in. No big deal. You have roommates in college. Two weeks later his friend asked me to move out.
Another roommate would blast his radio at night while asleep. A couple of times I would turn it off. He'd get up later and turn it on.
Posted by: hadsil
at September 4, 2010 8:25 PM
A little back story: I owned and lived in a trailer. I had an extra room and a "friend" who needed a place to live. I had a large Golden named Max and two cats. She had a Golden as well. It was a small space for all those animals, but I was willing to make do. Her dog was very well behaved. Mine, however, had no self control when it came to anything he deemed edible. Could I have trained him better? Sure, but I got him when I was 12 and wasn't exactly a dog training expert. He was about 11 at this point, so I had just learned to not leave any food out. The roommate knew this. She had know me and Max for quite some time. Any time we went to visit her, she would have to pick up her dog's food bowl and her trash can.
Anywho, the problems started when she was having her boyfriend stay over 3 nights a week. I didn't mind him. He was a nice guy I had known since high school. He also had a HUGE german shepard that would stay over with him. Fine, she was a nice dog and well behaved, so I didn't make an issue out of it. Then I realized that I was spending my ONE day off a week cleaning up all the fur in the house (and the bathroom...and the kitchen). I finally confronted the roommate about it and she claimed that she HAD cleaned the bathroom before (lie) and she didn't feel the need to clean up the rest of the house because she pretty much kept to her room. That was true...but did she think neither of those dogs dropped ANY fur or mud in the hallway on their way to her room? I wasn't asking her to do all the cleaning, just run a vacuum over the high-traffic areas on her way to her bedroom once in a while. She seemed to think that since I had a day off and she didn't, I should just do it. She just wanted to "live her life". In what? Filth? For the record, I worked about 15 more hours a week than her, I just jammed it all into 6 days so I could have one, glorious day off.
Nothing got better with the cleaning, so I just sucked it up and dealt with it. One day, I came home from work to find my dog extremely sick. He wouldn't even get up to eat his dinner. Since he was older, I was convinced he was dying. As I walked to my room to change and rush him to the vet, I glanced in her room to see a whole 15lb bag of dog food ripped open. Aha! That would be why Max can't even walk! Now, I know my dog was a pig. I know as his owner I should have trained him better. I also know that just about every Golden I have met, no matter how well behaved, would eat until his/her stomach explodes if given the chance. I was FURIOUS. She KNEW how he was, yet left and entire bag of dog food in the middle of her floor. He ended up recovering over the next few days, but his stomach could have flipped. He could have died. When sh*t really hit the fan and we got into a screaming match a few weeks later, she actually screamed at me for not offering to pay for the food. I screamed back: "You would have been paying for the f*cking vet bills if he had needed surgery!!" Again, I know my dog was in the wrong, but what else was I supposed to do? I warned her. I offered to buy her a plastic bin for her dog food. I gave her tips on where to put things that he wouldn't find them. EVERY time she complained that he ate her cookies or something, I would ask: "Where did you leave them?" and her response was always: "On my nightstand." Well, there you go. She knew how he was. She didn't have to move in there. She SAID she understood what needed to be done. Apparently not.
She also insisted on watching American Idol with my friend and I AND singing along or talking through the entire show. One night I was watching the Sopranos...the one where Chris dies. Yeah, pretty intense. She was having dinner with her boyfriend in the kitchen (right next to the TV room)and talking REALLY loud (as she usually did). I tried just turning up the TV. That only made her talk louder. It soon became apparent that she wanted me to hear whatever she was yapping about. I turned up the TV, she got louder...this went on for a few minutes until she finally called my name and started asking me about lord knows what. All I said was: "Can this wait 20 minutes until my show is over?" Nope. It couldn't. It turned into: "What are you watching? Oh, I don't like that show...too violent. I don't like violent shows...." I felt like screaming: "Well, I DO like them and I am TRYING to watch this!!!!!" Rude! You don't have to agree with my choice of shows, but you could at least respect my TV time and leave me alone when I am obviously into whatever I'm watching.
She also refused to pay half of the internet bill because she didn't even want to connect her computer to the web. Fine. Stupid, but fine. Well, what do you think happened when her boyfriend went out of state for an internship. That's right, she would use my computer AND my email to write to him. I told her several times that I would buy a router and we could hook up er computer. She said she didn't need that....obviously to avoid having to pay half the internet bill. She just used my computer every time she needed something. BTW, half of the internet bill would have been a whopping $10-$12 a month.
My next roommat was an opiate addict who stole from me and I would STIL rather live with her again that little Miss "I just wanna live my life".
Posted by: Kimmy
at September 10, 2010 4:18 PM
If you are still looking at these and you have not seen this link:
True? Not true? Don't know and do not really care. Gives insight into the college rommie mindset though, even if the stories are 80% bullshit you can at least see what the younger generation considers fair and reasonable.
Posted by: Gareth
at October 5, 2010 12:37 PM
What's Mine Is Mine; What's Yours Is Mine
I mentioned this on a blog entry, but I'll repost it here. I had a roommate who matter-of-factly helped himself to my toiletries every morning as he went to take a shower. My soap, razor, shampoo, shaving cream, toothpaste, etc. Thank God he wasn't using my toothbrush.
He had his own, but preferred mine. Whenever I told him to stop, he'd start screaming. Literally screaming, insisting I was being ridiculous. Ridiculous or not, it's my prerogative to protect my investment, whether he liked it to not.
He wouldn't stop. I would put large notes on the door to my wardrobe, advising him to stay out of it. But he would ignore it. Trying to talk reasonably to him would simply start him screaming again.
He would tell me to just take his stuff...but since we both agreed that I used the better products, why would I? Until such time as the director of student life arranged for a new room assignment, I had to lock my belongings in my trunk, consigning me to the minor hassle of having to unlock and relock my trunk every time I wanted to take a shower.
Posted by: Patrick
at October 18, 2010 1:45 PM
when i was a freshman in college, i decided to do a three-way roommate swap. some of the rest of the girls wanted to do the move on the monday before thanksgiving, and i asked to wait until after the holiday because i had a big test on tuesday for one and also was getting a carpet from my aunt over the break and it would be a lot easier not to move the furniture twice. they agreed to wait. so, my new almost-roommate and i went over to watch a movie with someone else to de-stress before i started studying - this someone else had specifically requested to watch this movie on this night, and then proceeded to clean her closet while we were playing it - and i came back to my room to find all of my stuff gone. i went up to my now actual roommate's room to find the whole crew there, having moved all of my things without my consent and expressly against my request. i wasn't gonna make a scene though. then they proceeded to yell at me for not helping. really? after i asked you not to move my stuff and you agreed? how was i supposed to then know that you were going to move my stuff anyway, and how am i then obligated to help? coincidentally, i had agreed to let my previous roommate use my refrigerator until the end of the year since new-roommie already had one and old roomie didn't. at the end of the year she argued that she should be allowed to keep it. no, i don't think so.
Posted by: me
at June 20, 2011 10:17 AM
Is a stop sign red or blue? (required):