The Internet
Gotta love those anono-weenie commenters who wouldn't say "Where's the asparagus?" to you in the supermarket, but say the rudest things to or about you on the Internet. For example, this recent tweet I got from a guy who didn't like a post I wrote about bikers taking up all lanes of the street:
@Deprogrammer9 @amyalkon eat a dick hag. 8:15 AM Aug 29th via web
Tell me your experiences with rudeness on the Internet.
Comments
What's a dick hag? Is that like a fag hag?
Oh, yeah...
Posted by: MonicaP at September 1, 2010 9:11 PM
They weeniest ones are not only short on manners, but punctuation.
Posted by: Amy Alkon at September 1, 2010 9:36 PM
I like the ones who post their particular brand of stupid on a message board, and then, when they get called out on it, create a sockpuppet to stick up for and agree with themselves, and THEN try to deny it, in spite of the fact that the mods tell everyone it's coming from the same IP addy.
Posted by: Ann at September 1, 2010 10:23 PM
What I hate is going to a completely non-political website and finding political crap in the comments. I am, actually, a politics junkie--but sometimes I don't want to think about it. Evidently, there are an awful lot of people out there who refuse to ever not think about it.
Posted by: Karen at September 4, 2010 4:38 AM
Sorry, I just have to rant a little bit more!
It seems to me that the commenter making inappropriate political comments usually thinks he's being clever. But it is incredibly rude because it means you either think everyone else there has the same politics as you, or, even worse, that your "right" to snark far outweighs any duty to public decency towards people who, obviously, are too stupid to hold the correct political opinion.
Posted by: Karen at September 4, 2010 4:49 AM
Also, anyone using the terms Rethuglican, Demoncrat, Tea Bagger, or Obummer. Not only are you being rude to any of your readers who might be one of the above, but you've also just removed yourself from the list of comments and commenters to be taken seriously.
Posted by: Karen at September 4, 2010 4:55 AM
How about people who take your quotes out of context and use them to futher their own bizzare agenda?
Back when you could still post on Glen Sacks site I was asking a woman who claimed to have her son circumcised to spare him the .04% increaded risk of penile cancer in his 80's wheather or not she would have her soon to be born daughters breast buds removed to prevent the 12% chance that her daugter would devolp breast cancer BEFORE the age of 50.
Some nut job parsed my quotes very carfully and made the argument that I wanted womens breasts removed to prevent them from breast feeding in order to break the maternal bond formed durring breast feeding.
Then the psycho banned my response to her hatchet job once I discoved it.
The funny thing? for months while misquoting me she kept challanging me to respond and defend my words(all with out ever informing me of the challange) and when I did she sent me an email saying that she was banning me from ever posting on her site and that my attempts to 'backtrack' wouldnt be taken seriously
I refuse to read blogs where EVERY SINGLE comment has to modereated and approved by the blogger anymore
Posted by: lujlp at September 7, 2010 1:55 AM
I HATE it when I'm into a debate with someone and make a small typo. All of a sudden they no longer care about their stance on the issue, only that I misspelled something or made a small grammar error. I get annoyed when people show NO understanding of the English language, too. However, it's always the ones who basically have no valid argument on whatever we're debating that seem to go nuts over these things. I tend to type on blogs and message boards how I talk. Sometimes that means my punctuation isn't perfect, or I type so fast that I use the wrong word or misspell. It doesn't make me stupid. At worst, it makes me too lazy to use spell check. The worst is when you address their "concerns" about your education and try to get back on topic but they KEEP bringing it up. It irks me.
Posted by: Kimmy at September 8, 2010 7:26 PM
I recently ran across an article by, apparently, a generally sane an reasonable writer. Unfortunately, said article tacitly contributed to the rude, judgemental and generally unacceptable behaviour directed by society at large the world over towards those who don't conform to white, Western beauty standards. How did it do this? Why, by suggesting that those standards are right, natural and unchangeable, of course. How can we be expected to refrain from pointing and sniggering at fatties if we're evolutionarily wired to scorn them, after all?
Look at the cause, not just the symptom.
Posted by: A Girl Named T at December 21, 2010 10:11 PM
It's not "rude" to publish evidence-based science that does not conform to or parrot feminist talking points.
Standards of beauty fluctuate slightly but are remarkably same across borders and cultures. (These are not standards created by the media, as feminist ideologues will have you believe, but the product of millions of years of evolution. As Dr. Donald Symons wrote in "The Evolution of Human Sexuality," "Beauty is in the adaptations of the beholder." He also notes that adaptations take hundreds or thousands of GENERATIONS to take hold.)
Across cultures and borders, to name just one example, men prefer a woman of average weight with an hourglass figure -- an indicator of fertility. Whether men prefer fat women or thin women relates to the availability of food in a culture. In cultures where food is plentiful, thin women are in. In cultures where it is scarce, fat women are. In Mauritius, they fatten women up until they are enormous. Thin women are considered homely.
Being fat is unhealthy, and tends to compromise one's success with men, save for a few who prefer fat women (they are few, unfortunately). Many women are only fat, however, because they have been sold a bill of goods by the medical establishment. To lose weight relatively effortlessly, and without exercising like mad, read Why We Get Fat, by Gary Taubes. Link here: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0307272702?ie=UTF8&tag=advicegoddess-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=0307272702
Also, you should probably disabuse yourself of the notion that it is rude to speak the truth. It can be if you are telling somebody's grandma that you are an atheist, and you'll lead her to stay up night's worried that you'll burn in hell. Telling women that beauty matters, that doing the best they can with what they have will increase their opportunities in love and in life, and telling them that they can either accept that or accept the opportunity costs of going ungroomed is not rude -- even if you happen to be a woman who prefers to avoid losing weight to increase her selection of men. You've read your choices and you're free to make them, but they're informed choices.
Likewise, I choose not to be in advertising, which means I make a lot less money and worry that I'll be dining on Friskies casserole at 80 (or 50). Choices usually come with a price -- either pay the price or choose otherwise.
Posted by: Amy Alkon at December 22, 2010 12:17 AM
I say that if you are going to comment, please do not hide behind anonymous. There are some people who know exactly who you are. And when somebody calls you on your behavior, please do not continue to do said behavior.
Rude behavior on the Internet will get you nowhere. I think it's mean, unjust, and just plain rude.
I would never say some of the nasty things to people that some have said to me. Instead, I prefer not to engage them, but I prefer to rise above thier stupidity.
People can be jerks when it comes to the Internet, it baffles my mind.
Posted by: Eva at September 26, 2011 9:46 PM
I find it plain hilarious when someone uses the capslock key when being serious.
For example.
"I find it PLAIN HILARIOUS when someone uses the capslock key WHEN BEING SERIOUS."
Also when someone doesn't use proper grammer. I get it when you're chatting or texting and it's a spur of the moment conversation, but on forums and message boards where you have time to type out and proofread your posts.
What else...oh yeah, when in communities you don't find a particularly popular guy to be hot stuff because they're douchebags and his friends whine at you for "attacking" them when you just say the douchebag in question wasn't worth your time. The douchebag in question didn't care about what I said about him, so I felt free to say what I wanted about him on my blog.
Or when people decide to avoid an ignore to harass you more via sockpuppets.
Posted by: DieselBlue at October 18, 2011 6:33 PM
I belong to a certain knitting social networking site. I logged on Saturday, and I found a message from nobody I knew, but apparently they had some sort of issue with me. Yes, I have problems, who doesn't? I recently got fired from my job at a store that I was considered outside contractor, and right now, I'm more worried about my finances. I also have other problems that are realated to depression, and I'm working hard to solve those problems with the little means and resources that I have right now.
Anyhoo, whatever it was, they would keep messaging me. It was as if they kept pushing the issue, and whatever problem they had with me. I ignoredc them twice, hoping they would take the hint, but apparently, it wasn't working. I finally told the person to leave me alone, and that I was only going to say that once. THey have never messaged me again.
I had a feeling that they were on another forum that I used to be on, but I wasn't 100% sure. I also wasn't 100% sure if they were stalking me or bullying me. But I haven't heard from them since!
Posted by: Eva at October 24, 2012 9:14 PM
I agreed with lujlp. Too many times, people can't find a way to rebuttal your facts and arguements so all they can do is nit pick your writing, spelling, grammar, and punctuation.
You go to police officers' websites and if the cops don't like your valid opinions, arguements, or complaints, they tried to profile you as being anti-cop, a mentally unbalance person, and then tell you to take your drugs. You are also labled as a card carrying member of the ACLU. They also tried to lecture you about your writing ability and then tell you that you need to go back to school. If you are a cop who disagres with other cops, then they tried to say that you are not a cop, just a wannbe cop who could not pass the police academy.
Cops on the websites don't want to hear from you then they ask the website owner to prevent you from putting your viewpoints on their websites. That is taking rudeness to a new level when the cops don't want to hear from the community in cyberspace.
Posted by: Gunther at July 9, 2013 3:13 AM
I've been on a consumer advocate website and I hate it when people use cuss words as a part of their name and or bully other people who post their own opinions about other people's comments in a mean way. Trying to tell the moderators about the bullying has been a pain in the neck and as a result, I rarely ever use that website again. Lack of enforcement will cause me to cease and or limit doing business with a website.
Posted by: anonymous at December 29, 2013 2:35 PM
I am updating a post I wrote on Dec. 29:
Last Wednesday, I was on that same website again and I'll be darn someone was bullying other people and I complained to the moderation department.
Well, nothing was done to stop the bullying and therefore, I am no longer doing business with this website.
Posted by: anonymous at January 7, 2014 12:52 AM
I was on a website that ranks schools and I was dissatisfied with my comment and asked them to remove the comment as I gave them my consent to do so. However, they start asking for my personal information which really made me upset. After twice trying to ask them nicely to take it down, I got emails and I do not know if they contacted the school to get my info, but I've had it and I blocked out their emails so they cannot harass me anymore in what was supposed to be a simple request.
By the way: I did not give that site any information.
Posted by: Fed Up at January 22, 2014 2:40 PM
I was a website and I had listed the wrong information on there (because the site prechose the information rather than allowing the user to correct the wrong information) and I complained about it to be told that they cannot change it. Really? They were so rude, I sent another reply explaining that if they're going to be rude over a simple mistake of theirs, then I won't be doing business with people who are going to be so rude and defensive when it was them who made the mistake and not me.
Posted by: Unhappy at February 14, 2014 2:46 PM
They did respond to me and made things very heckish for me in a simple request. The head of the website was not going to budge in admitting THEY made the mistake....
Posted by: Unhappy at February 14, 2014 4:29 PM
Worst are these youngsters and college-educated kids who use a lot of cuss phrases and slang and the worst cuss phrase I hear often is STFU. I'm like, why are they even using that kind of foul language on the internet when most websites tells these people to use their language. It is disgusting to see our youth obsessed with cuss phrases and disgusting and dirty language, I wonder where the parents are.
Posted by: Anonymous at February 21, 2014 7:11 PM
I made a mistake on the comment on Feb. 21 on the part about language. On the line "use their language" it should be "watch their language." I apologize for the error.
Posted by: Anonymous at February 22, 2014 5:34 AM
I do not mind people using Yelp to make negative or positive or in the middle experiences with businesses; however, I strongly dislike people who make mean comments about other people and their own opinions. I read one mean comment and tried to complain to yelp that the girl was violating policy, however, Yelp sided with the girl.
If websites cannot monitor people and their mean behavior on the internet, then I do not need to do business with Yelp.
Posted by: Angry at March 27, 2014 6:32 AM
I hate jerks on Facebook who spread malicious rumors and curse out people who tell them to stop. If you can't say something nice, then don't say anything.
Posted by: Outraged at April 19, 2014 3:36 AM
I was rating a business on a website and for no reason, my comment was removed. In regards to the business I was complaining about-the business does not care about their customers and that is what I wanted to share. My comment was very clean and did not have any profane language in it and did not attack anybody else. A year earlier, I have written another review for the same business, but it was also deleted and the comment was squeaky clean.
I have a feeling that the business who is deleting comments does not want to hear about people's bad experiences with the business. If so many people are complaining about your business, then try to take their advice to make the business better rather than ignore the customers. If the business keeps deleting clean comments which ask them to improve services, business, etc., guess who'll lose customers?
Posted by: Fed Up Consumer at May 9, 2014 2:10 AM
I find it rude for people who reply to other people's comments to be downright rude, crass, and insulting. I was on a site and a person made fun of another poster for no reason and I told this young lady that her attitude is downright inappropriate and I have reported her to the admin.
People do have a right to their opinion, but disrespecting other people is not the way to do things.
Posted by: Angry and Disgusted at July 19, 2014 6:08 AM
Social media sites allowing people to illegally post other people's personal info on the sites WITHOUT their permission. Should be illegal.
Posted by: Annoyed at September 10, 2014 3:59 PM
(I almost wrote this to you asking for advice. Then I found this page and I think it will be just as helpful show you this phenomenon in case it merits your commentary or disgust. It's probably happened, in some variation or another, to many people).
Long ago, I was close friends with "Meg" and "Elena." "Meg" and I naturally grew out of touch over years living far away from each other and not having much in common, but it's not like we ever fought. We had significant history. We remain "friends" on social media, where she is a dedicated status poster and attention cultivator. Sure that's harmless enough these days; she's a lot more reasonable than many of my friends who do the same. At least, I used to think so.
"Meg" has been very persistent, candid, and graphic in sharing her deeply personal struggles with infertility on her online newsfeed….to probably 500 people. I'm only one of them, and her saga has been personal to the point that I've wondered sincerely if she has any idea someone like me, who hadn't talked to her in years, is reading what she puts out there.
And unwillingly being affected by it.
She's been doing this for years, and many times she's gotten her hopes up about babies that she named, built a life around, and later lost. It's actually broken my heart to see all the pain she's been going through while the same social media utility also lets me see the worst people I somehow call acquaintances pop out ill-bred brats with deadbeats, because when drugs were the thing they did drugs and now that babies are the thing they have babies. "Meg" wasn't like that, she worked hard in life and married a well-chosen prospective father, and would probably be a great mom! Her grief is out there for us all to share with her. I've never exchanged any words with her about it because it seems too personal. I don't comment or butt in, but because she shares so much, I feel like I still know her like I used to, and I can't help but feel sympathy. I can't help but silently root for her. When I remember we don't talk anymore, she still seems like the protagonist on a show I like, and I still hope her dreams come true.
I'm still pretty close in real life with our mutual friend "Elena," although she lives far away. "Meg" finally carried one full term and "Elena" planned the baby shower ...and invited me. Having followed The Meg Show online for the last however many years, I was honored at the invitation, when normally I hate baby showers. I actually thought Meg wanted me there. Why would she share her personal life with me if she wouldn't want me at her baby shower? Also, why wouldn't she want me at her baby shower anyway? At the least, I'm bringing her presents she chose herself; how can anyone be shitty enough to object to that?
Without being weird or excessive in any way, and without trying to insert myself into her business, I went to her baby shower because I got invited without asking or expecting to be invited. She was really, really, surprised. She didn't, however, appear to be happy about it, and I was very uncomfortable. I regretted going, and felt as though I was weirding her out.
Which is funny because online, she's always looking for attention. Now I get looked at like I'm unwelcome for giving it to her?
I've never received any indication of thanks for my gift. Not a card, not a verbal "Thanks!" not an online word that would take her 3 seconds to type and send. I guess new moms are super busy like that...
Stupidly, when the baby was born, it was the first time I actually reached out to her online. All I said was what 500 other people said: "Congratulations on your beautiful baby!" She did not so much as "like" it, but she "liked" all the others. After looking for all that attention, she gets it, and in my mind I hear her response to be, "Ha, ha, I'm so special and important that you care about me, and you're so insignificant that I'm just annoyed by it!"
I know we're not close and it's stupid to feel slighted. But The Meg Show continues on my newsfeed every day with ceaseless baby spam. She has plenty of time to be online. She also built herself up online to win sympathy and attention just so she could be an ass to people who gave her support.
Now the thought of her makes me extremely disgusted and angry. I no longer wish her well. I wish rude people wouldn't pass on their genes, and that's all I can think when The Meg Show forces itself on my spare time. I'd like to leave it at that and move ever closer to my ultimate goal of freeing myself from social media.
But "Elena" is getting married this wedding season, and we'll both be at the wedding and, particularly, the bachelorette weekend.
I want to go on the bachelorette weekend. It sounds awesome.
..unless it means I'm taking a weekend of my rare, hard-won spare time just to be in the presence of the object of my seething anger and disgust. Is it rotten to go and ignore her? Is it worse to cancel plans I made before it occurred to me? I'd prefer not to talk to "Elena" about my problems with "Meg," that's petty. But is it pettier not to go at all, to let "Meg" decide for me? I'm left to wonder.
I also acknowledge my fault in it for being as addicted to the internet and social media as everyone else. I just don't draw people I wouldn't talk to in to my deepest personal struggles for likes and comments, just to alienate them when they happened to care.
Either way, that was a new low in internet rudeness, especially since it cost me my dignity, $40, and a Saturday afternoon.
Posted by: Seething at April 15, 2015 2:53 AM
I don't like forums that allow the posters to either bully one another or other people through the use of vulgar and derogatory language. And one thing which really turns me off and would top the extremely rude meter is posters being allowed to place lewd photos of themselves as their ID photo. That is why I will never go into a forum after witnessing such appalling behavior!
Posted by: Anonymous at March 14, 2018 1:59 AM