Language As A Window Into Human Nature
This is an abbreviated version of the very interesting talk I heard Steven Pinker give at the New Hampshire meeting of NEEPS (the NorthEast Evolutionary Psychology Society) a couple years ago:
My favorite part is at the end on direct versus indirect speech and individual knowledge versus mutual knowledge. I write about this here:
Of course, you mucked things up from the start by spitting up your feelings all over her shoes ("I told her of my attraction..."). When you don't know how somebody feels about you, you don't go all full-frontal with your feelings for them. Consider the difference between "Wanna have sex with me?" and "Would you like to come up and see my etchings?" which Harvard psych professor Steven Pinker addresses in "The Stuff Of Thought." With the latter, the girl is reasonably sure you aren't looking to guide her around a late-night art exhibition, but "indirect speech" allows both of you to maintain what Pinker calls "a comfortable fiction." The same goes for asking a co-worker out for after-work cocktails. Unlike lunch, the evening can morph into a date. If it doesn't, you can spin it as friendly drinks, or your new program, "No Co-worker Goes Home Thirsty" -- which you should find much easier on the ego than your old program, "An Audience With Genius: An Unwanted Declaration Of Attraction, Followed By A Long, Awkward Free Lunch."
There's also an apt bit, vis a vis events in Egypt, about assembling in a public square to challenge the authority of a dictator.
"indirect speech" allows both of you to maintain what Pinker calls "a comfortable fiction."
This reminds me of a line guys use to get a girl to come over for a booty call: Want to come over and watch a movie?
The first few times it was used on me I was too naive to realize what it meant, but I remember having conversations with my girlfriends about how without fail it always means, "Want to come over and start watching a movie, but ignore it so we can have sex?"
Current bf now says it works because you don't have to spell it out. Btw, he did not use that line on me. Once I wised up to the secret code, I just turned down the invites.
LL at February 16, 2011 3:26 PM
Off topic, but recently became aware of Florence + The Machine. She reminds of me you. Beautiful red hair, grey-green eyes, and clearly brilliant.
See the Drumming Song, Rabit Heart, Cosmic Heart.
Ally at February 16, 2011 7:00 PM
"No Co-worker Goes Home Thirsty"
If I ever have enough money to start a foundation, that's going to be the name of it.
Cousin Dave at February 16, 2011 8:24 PM
This is another thing Heinlein did ages ago. I forget which book it was in, but his character illustrated his point with the line, "Want to masticate some muscle tissue, hacked from the carcass of a castrated bull?"
I think it was in, "If This Goes On..." -- about the life of a cadet in the American Army of God.
Radwaste at February 21, 2011 7:26 PM
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