So a boy and his parents move into a new neighborhood, which means a new school for the boy. Unfortunately, the son has a terrible stuttering problem which only gets worse when he's nervous, so the parents arrange for the bus to pick the boy up right in front of their house so the kids at the bus stop don't pick on him.

The first day the bus comes, stops in front of the house, and the boy goes to nervously ask the bus driver is this was the bus for his school, but all he managed to get out was "ittsss thhh thhh thh buus fooo foofoofoor" When the bus driver closes the door and pulls away.

The second day, the boy goes to ask the bus driver if this was the right bus, but as he nervously stutters, the bus driver pulls away again.

On the third day, the mother is extremely peeved that she has to keep driving her son to school, so she hides in the bushes while the son is waiting for the bus, hoping to have a word with the driver. Sure enough the bus shows up, stops, the boy goes to ask the driver, and the bus starts to move. Just then the mother jumps out at the bus, makes it stop, and storms onboard to have a word with the driver.

"Why do you keep leaving my son here every morning?!" she asks
The bus driver replies, "Be be because he kee keeps making fuu fuu fuun of me!"

Will and Guy have an old friend called Dave Barker who lives in Portsmouth, Hampshire. In recent years Dave has turned his hand to driving buses.

One Thursday an inebriated man got on Dave's double-decker bus and sat in the bottom deck close to Dave. Now, Dave is not meant to allow drunks onto his bus but he had a good heart and let the man stay on.

The man started rambling on and on, so Dave suggested he should sit upstairs. 'The air is cleaner up there and you'll get a much better view.' The man agreed, but returned a few minutes later. 'What's wrong?' Dave asked. 'Don't you like it better up there?'

'It's fine', the drunk said. 'But it's too dangerous: There's no driver'.

At the next stop two more drunks got onto a bus. The first, name of Bill, asks 'Will this bus take me to 25th Street?'

The bus driver says, 'No, it won't.'

After a pause, the second man, name of Gerry, inquires, 'What about me?'

Quote of the month, by Pat Condell:

I wouldn't trust the United Nations to run a lemonade stand without thousands of people being needlessly killed.

The difference between Mick Jagger and a Scotsman is Mick says, "Hey, you, get off of my cloud." and the Scotsman says, Hey, MacLeod, get off of my ewe."