I Know, Nobody Comes To Me For The Cooking Tips
I always joke, "I don't cook; I heat."
But, as heaters go, I make the most of it.
In the morning, I microwave three strips of bacon in a lidded 14" Pyrex bowl.
I was cooking Italian parsley in it afterward (three minutes in a little leftover bacon grease, until crispy), but I found something more nutrient-rich: Kale.
Now I cook the hell out of the kale instead. When the bacon bowl is just out of the microwave, I dump out most of the grease into a little dish to save, leaving just enough to get all the kale wet (I cook about a cup of the raw stuff).
After six minutes on medium in my microwave it turns into little greasy bacony potato chips, except not out of potatoes. (Burnt, the stuff is odious, but keep in mind that your microwave temp may vary.)
Kale is super-healthy -- one of few sources of substantial vitamin K -- and cooked in bacon grease, it's nice and filling. And you could cook an old shoe in bacon grease and it would taste great.
Kale, not cooked, is slightly worse fare than an old shoe.







Try raw kale mixed with apple juice concentrate. Yummy salad.
Jeanette at August 1, 2012 12:18 PM
Amy Alkon
https://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2012/08/i-know-nobody-c.html#comment-3293414">comment from JeanetteThanks, Jeannette, but actually raw kale is not as healthy as cooked and, well, it also tastes like ass.
Also, apple juice concentrate is particularly unhealthy because it's basically concentrated frozen sugar. It would actually be less detrimental to your health to pour Coke on your salad.
Amy Alkon
at August 1, 2012 1:07 PM
Host server has this under Aug 2
lujlp at August 1, 2012 1:17 PM
Amy Alkon
https://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2012/08/i-know-nobody-c.html#comment-3293440">comment from lujlpI messed up and posted it for today when I thought I'd save it for tomorrow. Corrected by rolling back time. Or something like that.
Amy Alkon
at August 1, 2012 1:51 PM
I might try this since I have never found a way to get kale down my throat without gagging. Is there any food value after nuking the hell out of it Amy? My son teased me saying that eating parsley Amy's was like eating air.
Dave B at August 1, 2012 2:07 PM
Central Market has a suprisingly good kale salad (sauteed, I think) with slivered almonds and craisens in its cold case.
ahw at August 1, 2012 2:21 PM
I've grown kale because it makes an attractive ornamental in the garden but I never developed much of a taste for it. There are lots of hearty Asian greens that are similar but more tasty, IMO.
If one wants to go a step above heating, try stir-frying greens in peanut oil (or leftover bacon) with garlic, fresh ginger, and a little chile. Yum!
Astra at August 1, 2012 2:24 PM
I love kale, but it does have to be cooked. Amy is right, the nutrients are better released through the heat process...allot like tomatoes which is why I enjoy slabs of seared roma tomatoes as part of my breakfast.
I must admit I have never tried nuking it as I enjoy cooking. I coat my kale in a bit of olive oil, sprinkle garlic, kosher salt and a bit of paprika and toss in in a hot oven. I'm going to try it with the bacon grease on a stove top...I think I will get more consistent results...sometimes you do get the over burnt pieces or soggy pieces in the oven, but the "just right" ones are awesome, especially with a bit of Parmesan sprinkled on top.
My current project is getting non-breaded fried zucchini just right. Don't want it often, but sometimes it sounds so good. Maybe the bacon grease will work for that!
MsMarg at August 1, 2012 2:57 PM
Kale chips, two recipes:
toss with EVOO and salt, lay on baking dish, bake at a low temperature (100-200, I wing it) until crispy.
toss with tahini, nutritional yeast, soy sauce, garlic and vinegar, bake at a low temperature until crispy, takes longer as is wetter.
NicoleK at August 1, 2012 4:34 PM
Amy Alkon
https://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2012/08/i-know-nobody-c.html#comment-3293540">comment from NicoleKHere's my dear sweet pal Ari Levaux's recipe for kale chips:
http://www.flashinthepan.net/?p=851
Amy Alkon
at August 1, 2012 4:46 PM
I used to think I hated to cook, but what I realized is that I just hate making anything that requires measuring ingredients in the correct proportion, because I'm too impatient and never seem to get it right.
However, I'm great at chopping up vegetables, tossing them in olive oil and pepper, putting them in the oven along with a piece of chicken or fish, and cooking until done. Boom, you have a healthy, hot, colorful, "real food" meal. You can eat this every single day just using different types of protein and vegetables. IMO this is all the cooking anyone needs to know, and anyone who says they can't do this is either lying or hasn't tried.
Shannon at August 1, 2012 6:30 PM
The one I'm doing on weekends is pick up a couple of nice ribeyes. Before I throw it on the grill, I throw it in the freezer for 30-45 minutes. That way I can get a just a little charcoal on the outside and it is a nice medium on the inside.
My side is sliced onion, tomato, sliced fresh garlic sauteed on the grill in salted butter. I'll throw in some sort of Szechuan or other slightly spicy Oriental sauce into the mix.
That's grilling -- not Amy's style -- but just a suggestion to others who enjoy it. The side you can serve to the people who want a potato and skip the potato yourself, and probably no one would notice.
Jim P. at August 1, 2012 7:29 PM
Jim...what time is dinner?
sara at August 2, 2012 3:22 PM
I can probably come local to you if I don't have to fly. I don't think I can ship a grill that will get past the TSA scans. ;-) If you're within a couple of states of Ohio, just post on my blog. Or even if you aren't local, post on any blog entry and I'll see it.
Jim P. at August 2, 2012 9:29 PM
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