There was a Soldier, and a Sailor at the same bar drinking. The soldier goes into the restroom to pee. Just before he walks out the sailor walks in.

The sailor notices that the soldier didn't wash his hands. The sailor then asks the soldier, "Didn't they teach you to wash your hands in the Army?"

The soldier replies, "No, they taught me not to pee on my hands."
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Have you adopted a soldier yet?

So I'm sitting around watching the game this afternoon, when a Ford commercial comes on. In this particular commercial, the Ford zooms over a cliff and takes flight over a canyon. Of course, the usual "Don't try/professional driver/closed circuit" notice was displayed across the bottom of the screen, but this was added too: "Cars cannot fly."

Glad they let me know.

ORPMD: same disclaimer occurs in an ad featuring one of the Lunar Rovers. "Professional driver. Do not attempt."

Yeah, I'll give driving around the lunar surface a pass. My own Rover needs a new motor, anyway.

Old RPM Daddy: Yep, and I've noticed you can't drive pirates either.

It's depressing as all hell when you realize that there are people watching that Ford commercial who have such a weak notion of the difference between reality and fantasy that they actually think someone could drive a car off a cliff and have it fly.

As more than one pilot has observed to me:

Takeoffs Are Optional Landings Are Mandatory.

Most of the rest of the world doesn't notice this.

And the literal definition of flight is:

Travel through the air without outside assistance

That means going off the cliff is actually flight. The landing will suck though. :-p