Dave Barry Isn't Just Funny
Here's a right-on bit from a reason interview from years back, posted by Lucy Steigerwald in a blog item with the super title, "Dave Barry Knows the Secrets to Humanity and Freedom: Hookers and Elvis":
After a while, the way this country deals with drugs is just not funny. What a waste of everyone' s time and effort. What a waste of a lot of people's lives. The way we deal with drugs and sex. I saw one of these real-life cop drama shows, and they mounted a camera in this undercover agent's pick-up truck, right under the gear shift, and they sent him out to pick up prostitutes.So the whole show consisted of this guy, who's quite a good actor, driving to this one street, and young prostitutes come up to him and solicit him. He says OK. They get in. They're trying real hard to be nice. He's going to pay $23, that's all he's got and they said that's OK. Meanwhile, behind him the other cops, these fat men with walkie-talkies, are laughing and chuckling because here they are about to enforce the law and protect society. They take her to some street and then of course they come up and arrest her. This poor woman-I don't know whether she's feeding her drug habit or feeding her kids or whatever. And the cops are so proud of themselves, these big strapping guys.
It just made me sick to see this. To treat these people who are trying to make a living, one way or another, this way, and to be proud of it. It's on television and we're all supposed to watch this and feel good about it. It's just disgusting.








"It's like when cops sell drugs to people and then arrest them. And then we reach the point where I think it was Sheriff Nick Navarro in Broward County [Florida] had his lab making crack so they could sell it. They couldn't get enough in south Florida, so they had to actually produce it themselves."
Just to continue the article and the outrage.
I like reading his old essays out loud to my husband, but not while he's shaving. Too perilous.
Pricklypear at August 30, 2013 7:25 AM
I think prostitution is only illegal because it would be too hard for the government to get their paws on a slice of the take. If the act isn't illegal, payment for the act shouldn't be illegal either.
the Strawboss at August 30, 2013 9:07 AM
"Oh, the poor prostitutes who are just trying to make ends meet" - in a country like america which has a generous welfare where entire generations have gamed the system to live entirely off welfare, I don't think anyone needs to do hooking to have just the basics. These women just want easy money. Not that it is bad, its just that guys who pay for it are too stupid and need counselling to stop blowing off their entire days earnings of manual laborious work for a 1/2 hour with someone who was probably too lazy to do real work. But just because I am not for arresting the women, it does not mean that I pity the women who are doing it.
Redrajesh at August 30, 2013 10:04 AM
You know what is equally annoying?
Cigarette, and booze stings where cops take an under age person around to try and buy, and then issue tickets to distracted under paid liquor store and convenience store clerks who failed to read the birthdate correctly, on any one of two or three hundred forms of legal ID.
which of course, you need to buy booze or cigarettes, but not to vote.
Isab at August 30, 2013 10:18 AM
Amy Alkon
https://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2013/08/dave-barry-isnt.html#comment-3883180">comment from RedrajeshI don't think anyone needs to do hooking to have just the basics. These women just want easy money
Not my business and certainly not the state's.
Amy Alkon
at August 30, 2013 11:38 AM
Isab,
I have one even worse (at least in my opinion).
I got caught in a Sunday beer sales sting on my third day of work at a convenience store in college.
Alcohol sales on Sunday were prohibited by county law.
I was still in training. I was in the middle of learning how to close out the register (lots of paperwork and steps to remember) when a guy walked up and put a beer on the counter. I rang it up quickly and went back to the lesson at hand.
The experienced person training me stood right next to me and watched me ring up the beer ... on Sunday ... without saying a word about it being Sunday.
There were no signs for the customers on the beer cooler or at the register and no reminders for the staff about Sunday laws. The owner of the store was slapped on the wrist and told to put up some signs ... no fines were assessed. I, a minimum wage clerk, on the other hand was issued a ticket for hundred of dollars.
The police later said they were responding to complaints that the store was selling beer on Sunday.
It was my first Sunday working there. There was no way I was responsible for the supposed rash of Sunday sales.
The judge was sympathetic, but not sympathetic enough to dismiss the charges. I had, after all broken the law.
So I got a police record (later expunged) on my third day on the job.
Arrrgh!
Conan the Grammarian at August 30, 2013 4:12 PM
Dave Barry writes: This poor woman-I don't know whether she's feeding her drug habit or feeding her kids or whatever.
Why does this make a difference?
It's not that I approve of crack moms. I don't. In fact, I don't approve of illegal drugs at all. But why should it be a consideration for the cops. They don't try to stop me from earning money based upon what I do with it.
So, whether she's feeding her kids or feeding her drug habit isn't the issue. You either believe prostitution should be legalized or not.
Patrick at August 30, 2013 6:04 PM
I don't think anyone needs to do hooking to have just the basics. These women just want easy money.
I can't imagine anyone getting into prostitution without some major-league driving incentive. It sounds like unsatisfying and risky work. I can't see someone plying their trade for spending money. Either they've got an expensive drug habit or they're desperate to feed their kids.
I can't see college girls going hooking on Wednesday for the sake of money to party on Friday.
Patrick at August 30, 2013 6:09 PM
Conan, you criminal thug. Boy, after posting with someone for years and years, you think you know them. Turns out ol' Cone-head's just a hardened criminal.
Bad, Conan! Bad!
Patrick at August 30, 2013 6:13 PM
Conan, I agree. Also, these kind of picky administrative law stings, makes it really tough on people who dont have a lot of skills but want to work, rather than be on welfare.
One three hundred dollar fine, always payable by the clerk and not the business, and you wonder why so many people would rather collect welfare or SSDI than work at a convenience store?
Isab at August 30, 2013 6:31 PM
There are some things that the government should not really be in beyond a minimum. Most of them are considered "vices".
Fuck the governments.
Jim P. at August 30, 2013 6:39 PM
If these crime fighting videos can be seen on TV any night of the week, why aren't we allowed to see them in court? Last week, I demanded to see the dashcam video from my traffic stop and the commissioner practically threw me out of the court room. There was a regular-size TV parked ten feet to the left of the judge's seat, so it's not like I was making an unreasonable demand.
$237 please, leave your cash with the clerk on your way out. Oh, our traffic school fee is another $52. The actual school has its own fee.
Thankfully, I make good money... not as much as hookers, but I won't miss any meals.
jefe at August 30, 2013 9:50 PM
"Cigarette, and booze stings where cops take an under age person around "
Happened to me in college - my boss called me and said I'd been the victim of a sting. Although I was careful not to sell to underaged buyers they had a photo of an amazingly hot babe buying beer from me - and they said she was 20.
My boss laughed it off and paid the fine. I was amazed at their behavior - but now that I'm older and have known a few cops, nothing those scumbags do surprises me.
Gog_Magog_Carpet_Reclaimers at August 31, 2013 8:33 AM
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