A-fucking-nnoyingly, when you look up "barefoot" and "immune system" on Google Scholar, it seems there's a researcher named "J. Barefoot" who studies the immune system. Grrr.

Search result ruiner!

Two way street, so long as it's not a health issue. Everybody is disgusting in their own way. Or has a habit you hate.

My wife cannot finish a drink or take a glass to the kitchen. Place fills up with half-drunken glasses.

I snore.

We adapt.

I read through the barefoot wiki entry. I would not have a problem with a girlfriend that wanted to go barefoot.

From the link:

Dirty feet are an obvious outcome of going barefoot all day. A surprising outcome: how much Sarah likes to terrorize me by randomly touching me with her feet. My girlfriend is an odd bird...

I would put a wash bowl/basin by the entrance(s). And if she wanted to "terrorize" me with it, I would be asking what else she would think is "funny".

That "terrorize" says to me she doesn't want to understand or accept his feelings. Granted that was 2008, but still.

Easy to see why shoes mostly have black soles.
I imagine that if you go barefoot almost constantly, the dirt actually gets ground into the calluses on your feet enough so they will never look really clean.

The real problems for a relationship are those that are not very easily seen, like 20k worth of credit card debt, student loans, and addiction to prescription pain killers.

If this guy is germophobic, the only good match will be another germophobe.

I have a cousin like this, wonderful person, but her entire life is organized around what she perceives of as germy.
She cant even drive by a medical waste truck without getting an anxiety attack.

Sorry, dude, but this is a Suck It Up scenario. Seriously, how often do you see the bottom of someone's feet? This isn't like an SO who refuses to brush their teeth or prone to enthusiastic public nose mining. This is a minor qualm and isn't even that gross. I'd be more worried about the whether or not she's picking all that dirt up from the carpet, personally...

Just inside their home, or indoors and outdoors and eveywhere?

Pets?

If it's just inside and no pets and she drinks beer send her my way. We'll kick back no shoes together.

If it's just indoors at your place and there are no pets make sure the floors are very clean and change the sheets and pillow cases more often.

I'm barefoot right now in front of the computer.

I propose a compromise: Ask her to wear Vibram FiveFingers shoes. Her feet will feel nearly barefoot, but her soles will stay clean.

Figure out why it's important to you, lead with that, figure out what's important to her, and then brainstorm and experiment to find what works for you both.

I have a limited sense of smell, and the unfortunate body chemistry of smelling like whatever I've eaten. When I wake up smelling like booze and garlic, my sweetie with the super-sensitive nose tells me. That's my cue to shower, and then we get to be close, which we both want. The trade off is that it's her job to smell things in the fridge whenever I ask, because I can't smell them and I can't afford to get food poisoning.

I think a lot of guys appreciate women's feet, and take pride in a woman's attractiveness. If that's his deal, I think it's important to be genuine about that, be clear that he loves her sensuality and doesn't want her to give up being free footed - and that he would love it if she would clean her feet more frequently so that he could have an unobstructed view. Then take the risky step of asking if she would be willing to clean her feet each night. Or before they go out together. Or whatever will scratch the itch he's getting at. Consider positive reinforcement that creates pleasurable associations without focusing on cleanliness per se - practicing couple's foot massage on one another, giving her a gift certificate from a professional, resting a hand on her foot when you veg on the couch.

And prepare to be gracious, because turn-about is fair play.

These convos are risky and awkward at first, but worth the bumbling. The asker gets better at considering feedback and at asking.

It's funny, how some people get hung up on bare feet being dirty. Meanwhile, they wear shoes all day, the same ones outside and inside, and how often do they wash their shoes?

Oferpetesakes, give her a gift card for a pedicure, already!

Buy her dainty, sparkly flip-flops as a compromise. I have razor-thin ones that make me look and feel barefoot. Fivefinger shoes (mentioned above) are super comfortable but not so cute. Other options would be ballet slippers (real ones), slipper-socks (with rubber bits on the soles to prevent a Tom Cruise dance move), very cute house slippers, or Chinese slippers.

My wife wears cute shoes or sandals outside and goes barefoot inside, so I don't have this guy's problem. Instead, I have my own problems, like that my wife is a slob. She leaves crumpled napkins on the kitchen counter, sweaters on the couch, bras on the floor, dishes on her night table, and shoes everywhere. Don't even ask me about her car. It's a trash can on wheels. But she is so cute, beautiful, nice, and easy-going, I just have to shrug off the slob part and move on. And it's not like I'm perfect either. My wife accepts my bad parts along with my good ones. Picking people is not like picking food at a buffet. You don't get to choose Amy's brains, Beyonce's body, and Mother Thersa's heart. Sorry, people are package deals. You either take or bail on the whole thing. That's the challenge of relationships.

"It's funny, how some people get hung up on bare feet being dirty. Meanwhile, they wear shoes all day, the same ones outside and inside, and how often do they wash their shoes?"

Actually, we've sort of gotten into the Japanese habit of taking our shoes off at the door. Not every day, but any time that we've been outside a lot, or have been anyplace that's dirty or wet. E.g., if I go for a run in the evening, I take off my shoes at the door so I don't bring bits of asphalt back in the house with me.

As for the LW, the devil is in the details here... how barefoot is barefoot? In the Southeast U.S., it's no thing to go about barefoot around the house during the summer, and that would include the deck, porch, driveway, most hardscape areas, and the yard when it's dry. On the other hand, if the GF goes mucking about in the garden, or at the dog park, and then insists on tracking it in the house... well, we were all supposed to have learned as children not to do that. If LW is having to scrub dirty footprints off the floor every day, then I understand his predicament. On the other hand, there may be very little he can do, short of breaking up. So if it's that big a deal to him, then he has to prepare himself for the possibility.

Amy, to answer the question you /actually/ asked, yes, I have had luck getting partners to change things, and I have been asked.

I have gotten different guys at various points to 1) not pick his teeth at the table, 2) learn to throw out underwear when it starts to get holes, 3) not pass gas in front of me, 4) not scratch his crotch in front of other people, 5) trim his super-long nose hair, and 6) switch to a dandruff shampoo. They were all different men.

I have been trained to 1) stop sandbagging drinks (like Brad's wife), 2) clean up as I cook, 3) put my keys in the same place every time, 4) refill things after I finish them.

The only appearance-related thing I was asked to change was in the 90s. He wanted me to go Gwen Stefani blonde, and I did until my hair started breaking off. :)

Hot pepper powder on the floor.

If her feet are getting that dirty inside, the floors are filthy. If not, and she goes outside without shoes, give her some flip-flops or clogs to keep by the door. And if her feet actually stink, tell her. Oh- buy her some of those "Mr Pumi" pumice bars from the beauty supply store- they're maybe two bucks, and you can keep them in the shower.

Is he hesitant to ask, or have they had a convo but no change?

Amy, I asked as sweetly as possible and also directly--no long-winded explanation. "Baby, do you mind Xing your X for me?"

When I got "compliance" I responded with adoration and, um, amorousness.