What airline lets you pick aisle and window seats for $25? I haven't seen that lately (mostly United flyer). What I have seen is the airline breaking up families who bought tickets together and sticking minor children off by themselves.

I've been asked to switch aisle for center seats. I've said yes when it was a family situation like above and no when it was a boyfriend and girlfriend who wanted to cuddle. I didn't really think it was an asshole request though: just one I wasn't obliged to honor with a yes.

You can upgrade for a sum of money ($25, $50, $35) to premium economy seats that have a bit more room. Because I get motion sick, I am a demon about buying a plane ticket early and will sometimes choose a later or earlier flight based on whether the seats are all taken or not. I need to sit up front, close to the bulkhead seat, and I will pay and make an effort to do that.

What I have seen is the airline breaking up families who bought tickets together and sticking minor children off by themselves.

Serious question: I've heard of this, but never seen it. How does it happen?

When I buy a plane ticket, I am usually given the opportunity to select my seat, and sometimes upgrade for a small fee. (Southwest is, of course, an exception.)

If a family bought tickets late, I can see being stuck with random middle seats, but aren't these assigned when Mom or Dad puts down the credit card?

You can upgrade for a sum of money ($25, $50, $35) to premium economy seats that have a bit more room. Because I get motion sick, I am a demon about buying a plane ticket early and will sometimes choose a later or earlier flight based on whether the seats are all taken or not.

Me too. Recently Southwest missed my connection and put me on a next day flight. I requested an upgrade to the 'A' group for the inconvenience, but they said they couldn't do that because the 24-hour window had closed.

Southwest offers premium boarding (if they have it) if you pay a fee one hour before the flight. In that case, it was worth it to me to show up at the airport early (well before the hour) and explain the situation nicely to a gate agent. She couldn't waive the fee, but she made sure I was in the premium boarding group without having to "compete" exactly 60 minutes before the flight. And I went from what was surely a middle seat in the back to an exit row aisle.

When I buy a plane ticket, I am usually given the opportunity to select my seat, and sometimes upgrade for a small fee.

Right. I choose the seats. If it's important to you to sit together -- to the point where you're going to maybe bother some introvert who lives to not be spoken to by strangers -- pay the price up front; don't take your chances and then put somebody in the position of having to say no to you.

Posted by: Amy Alkon at May 28, 2014 2:22 PM

Yep. You and I have discussed the panic that we motion sick people feel at being closed in in a middle seat.

I have never failed to get an aisle seat on Southwest by paying the fee to upgrade to A status.
It is a very small fee, and darn well worth it.

I did have a jerk sitting next to me, in the middle seat, on another airline once, ask if I would trade seats with his six year old son who was sitting in the middle seat ahead of us.

I said no, and it would have taken more than a hundred bucks for me to even consider it.

I honestly believe that most of the people pulling this scam are grifters.
They expect someone to feel sorry for them, so they buy the cheapest tickets they can hoping that some compassionate dupe, will give them a freebie.

Serious question: I've heard of this, but never seen it. How does it happen?

When I buy a plane ticket, I am usually given the opportunity to select my seat, and sometimes upgrade for a small fee. (Southwest is, of course, an exception.)

It can happen when an airline suddenly decides to use a smaller plane for a flight, last-minute. Seats assignments booked months in advance get shuffled around (why airlines make no effort to put people in the same reservation together, I have no idea), and families get separated, even though they selected seats together during the booking process. Or, sometimes a flight gets overbooked, and a family of 5 gets bumped to another flight and placed in seats that aren't anywhere near each other.

I have personally been in both situations. Luckily not when traveling with a child.

" Or, sometimes a flight gets overbooked, and a family of 5 gets bumped to another flight and placed in seats that aren't anywhere near each other"

Usually when they bump people, they first ask for volunteers, and at the same time start offering financial incentives to take a later flight.

A lot of people ride that for all it is worth, and hope to get bumped to get the money or free round trip tickets to somewhere else for volunteering to be bumped.

It would be insane to put yourself into this situation with small children.

So I am not too sympathetic to people that take chances like this, and then whine about it.

Occasionally a plane might be substituted because of mechanical difficulties, or cancelled because of weather, but you as a parent ought to be cognizant of what can happen, and plan for it.
Sometimes shit just happens, but I also find it insane that any parents would get on a plane with more than one small child per parent.

If you really want to be this stupid, and you all end up in different rows, with middle seats, follow Amy's advice, and bring several fifty dollar bills. Let the auction begin.

Happened to me on Hawaiian. Booked flight some 8 months in advance and showed up to having 4 seats spread all over the plane - my kids were 8 and 10 at the time. It happens.

"Happened to me on Hawaiian. Booked flight some 8 months in advance and showed up to having 4 seats spread all over the plane"

On most airlines, booking a specific seat or set of seats is different from buying the ticket. There is usually an up charge on most airlines and reservation sites for being able to select your seats at the same time you buy the ticket.

Ignore this at your peril.

If you don't book a seat you are the last priority if the plane is full, and they will sandwich you in wherever.

I've had it happen booking months in advance and when I specifically selected seats. Only once were we not accommodated because of the change. Often we are even called up before the flight boards and they tell us that they are working on seating us together. I don't think it's an asshole request, nor do I think you are obligated to say yes.

When my son was in the army stationed in Alaska, he had a United flight that was late getting into Seattle when he came home on Christmas leave.

They were boarding for Denver when he and three other soldiers who had been on the delayed flight walked up to the gate.

They gave his confirmed seat away to a stand by passenger while he was standing there with his boarding pass in his hand.

That was 2005. No one in my family has booked a United Flight since, nor will we.

If you people are truly buying four or five seats together, and paying for those specific seats only to be denied those seats when you get on the plane, your beef is with the airline, and not your fellow passengers.

The airline is the one that should be offering the vouchers or the hundred dollar bills for people to switch seats so you can all sit together.

Clearly there is a huge range of experience here. I have never been offered a chance to pay to upgrade to an aisle or window seat, so I was curious where it occurs. (I have been offered the opportunity to move to an exit row or premium economy.)

For the past decade or so, most of my travel was on United, and I had premier status. I got their Economy Plus automatically (until they merged with Continental). I've never had someone ask to get into economy plus if they weren't already there. (I don't think the flight attendants would allow it.) I have had people ask to rearrange and I decided based on my needs and theirs. I am as introverted as they come but I am willing to say no if required.

When I traveled on other airlines in peon class (which I am now on every airline, thank God), I have had people ask because the airline split them up, and I have had airlines (like Isab's son, the awful United) give away my seat assignment. On Frontier, the flight attendant asked me because the gate agents didn't fix the separation of a mother and child, and give me a free drink and TV when I moved.

My point was not to argue with the overall point of Amy's advice--to think of others as well as yourself--but to note that not everyone is making an asshole request and assuming that they are is, well, rude.

My point was not to argue with the overall point of Amy's advice--to think of others as well as yourself--but to note that not everyone is making an asshole request and assuming that they are is, well, rude.

Posted by: Astra at May 28, 2014 5:31 PM

I think this is where you and I disagree. If the split up of child and parent was the result of an airline mistake, then the airline should be the one fixing it. The passenger should not have to go around asking other passengers.

But if the scattered seats are the result of buying your tickets from a discount online travel service, for which you paid two hundred dollars less than that guy with the aisle seat, or bought at the last minute, then you should be offering your own compensation to the individual(s) you want to switch with.

All of this is easily solved.

Re-regulate the airlines.

Raise prices to allow fewer - and larger - seats.

Abandon the city bus model and target a better demographic.

Stop serving booze on the plane.

Usually when they bump people, they first ask for volunteers, and at the same time start offering financial incentives to take a later flight.

And on holidays (or flights to popular cruise ports), often there are not enough volunteers.

Occasionally a plane might be substituted because of mechanical difficulties, or cancelled because of weather, but you as a parent ought to be cognizant of what can happen, and plan for it.

You can't plan for weather or equipment malfunctions. Even if you travel with one kid per parent, your four seats can end up scattered throughout the plane. Happened on a flight I was on (tons of weather delays caused a bunch of people to get shuffled to new flights). People practically scrambled to trade seats so they wouldn't be sitting next to an unsupervised five-year-old, so the problem solved itself.

Sure, you can avoid all air travel until your kids are 10 ... but some parents want their kids to meet their grandparents.

Look, we're talking about air travel here. I've seen my best-laid plans ruined spectacularly by the unpredictability of air travel and airline incompetence (including when I paid for specific seats, which I often do). You can't assume that everyone in a bad situation is there because it's their own fault.

On most airlines, booking a specific seat or set of seats is different from buying the ticket. There is usually an up charge on most airlines and reservation sites for being able to select your seats at the same time you buy the ticket.

Depends on the airline, actually. The ones I fly (American, United, Virgin) do not charge for reserved seats (or blocks of reserved seats), unless you want extra legroom. Or course, if you book last-minute, there might not be enough free seats left, but that's the price you pay for last minute bookings.

Like the other have said, I have made my carefully reserved lost many times. Including on a flight from San Fran to Nagoya Japan. I got lucky on that one in that agent said, "well let me look again..." "I can offer you 1000 extra frequent flyer miles....hmmm or for $600 I can upgrade you to business" Best $600 I ever spent. As she pointed out then and I have had pointed out other times, it specifically says seat selection is not guaranteed.

I have even been moved once I was sitting in the seat -- the seat was double assigned. I think I got a free drink out of that one.

Politely asking (i.e. not demanding) is not rude at all...expecting it to happen is pretty foolish.

also, they used to give good benefits for bumping but not recently from what I have seen. Usually just frequent flyer miles and some times a ticket for the restaurant..maybe access to their lounge. I have not seen a free ticket offered in at least 10 years.

Whatever airline or lines you fly on, sign up for their FF program so you can get access to your reservations on their Web site. 2-3 days before your flight, check your seat assignment on line and change it if it doesn't suit you. If there isn't a better seat available, keep checking; seats that are being held for various purposes will (unless the flight is sold out) be released as flight time approches.

On small aircraft, pax are sometimes asked to move for weight and balance purposes. I was on an RJ flight last year where they asked for volunteers to move to the rear, and promised a bottle of water (this on a flight that has no beverage service, but they always have a few bottles of water aboard). The FAs on these flighs are usually very appreciative when pax volunteer to move for weight and balance, and you get to pick any seat you want as long as it's in the last few rows.