The geek, the song... Sometimes it all comes together.

Crid, that was fabulous.

By feminist standards, I think there were a couple of sexual assaults in there.

Awkwardness with Grandma. Trying to figure out how my 20 year old, gainfully employed son can graciously turn down my mother when she gives him money for coming over to help her out (like digging holes when she wants to plant plants). He has more disposable income than the rest of us and her money is very limited. It makes for awkward interactions because he doesn't want the money yet also wants to humor her. She says paying him is the right thing to to. He thinks helping her without monetary remuneration is the right thing to do.

Anyone have experience or advice that would help?

LauraGr
No advice...but what a great problem to have. Two people trying to what is right.

Though on second thought...people like to give. They feel good when they do it. I think attempting to refuse the money once is ok, but if she insists then the gracious thing is to accept it. By completely refusing, you are denying her autonomy. Then maybe use the money to do something else to help her.

Grandson: "Gee, Grandma, I would really rather have some of those peanut butter\oatmeal\whatever cookies you make instead of money."

☑ Steamer

Crid; that white boy can totally dance!

LauraGR:
First have the grandson checked for brain injuries, etc....I mean a 20 year old thinking they don't need money for doing something is unheard of. :)

My family has a similar problem. Grandma has well outlived her savings so has to live on what the government gives her and tiny from a fund where she worked after my grandfather died...my mom guesses it is maybe $50/month. She still insists on paying family for doing things. You will have to figure out what works. My mother has found that with my grandmother it works to say it is for something - usually a holiday. I am sure everyone knows the game - but Grandma seems to accept it if she can say "Well, it was for flag day." The only thing she has gone for with the cookies idea is my father mowing her lawn - which is about 40ft long and two lawnmower widths wide.

This is more of just a rant...
This weekend has largely sucked. I took Friday off to get my car repaired - should only be a bit over an hour but has to be a week day - as well as some other stuff. Thursday night I get home to a message saying they don't room for my car so will have to reschedule. I am working with a salesman on something else and I discovered he was lieing to me -- or at least not giving me complete information. Saturday I had two appointments that I went that were not kept and not cancelled. One apparently just didn't show up for work. The other place was closing down as I got there at 4pm (posted hours to 5pm) and the lady there said they decided to close early since it was slow...I said I had an appointment 4pm. She looked on the computer and said "oops...there was one" but she couldn't help me. Another shop was closed but according to there sign and website they should be open. Another place similar had a sign on the street that said "open during construction" but I couldn't find place to park and no entrance that was not blocked off with plastic.

I am just so sick of this place...you cannot count on anything. I didn't experience this type of thing where I used to live...