Women weren't allowed to do stuff on their own only to fight for the freedom not to stuff on their own?

How did this come full circle?!

All of the above are great points. Additionally, the Panhellic order plays into/off of the stupid myth that Super Bowl day is the worst day of the year for spousal abuse. Debunking, if you're interested.

Every new day is the Worst Day Ever for women and children!

All sex is now illegal in the UK:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/law-and-order/11375667/Men-must-prove-a-woman-said-Yes-under-tough-new-rape-rules.html

The issue, or at least one aspect of it, is similar to the airline hijack issue. We collectively cannot be hijacked via boxcutter, ever again. We were helpless on 9/11 because we didn't know the rules of the game as it was played that day.

I believe that we need to educate girls in a similar way. We simply don't tell them the framework of the environment - that one boy in (some large number) will actually feed them liquor in an intentional way, as a game/project/dare/whatever, to see how drunk they can get her. They'll flatter her, and joke with her, and make her feel like there's that special spark, but that boy is simply pulling wings off of flies. No reason behind it - boredom? to see how much it takes? No reason at all... And girls need to put on their spidey-senses and recognize this. Telling them "don't get drunk" - it's not enough. It's like telling a fat person, "don't eat so much". They have to recognize what's going on in order to not fall into that trap.

I believe most guys, even most of those terrible frat boys that everyone's so scared of, don't do this. But - and it's not just frat boys - some do. That's where the majority of the danger lies.

Snoopy,

So UK sex will be like Greek business. Under the table and very hush hush.

Flbeachmom,

It isn't just women that get fed dangerous levels of alcohol. Guys do it to other guys too.

flbeachmom,

One should have an internal counter: 1 drink, 2 drinks, 3, 4, etc. Knowing your limits is the hard part. That's why I am fond of the saying leave the heavy drinking to the professionals, we know our limits.

I would also advise going with friends or in groups of people who have shown trustworthiness. Everyone watching each other's backs? priceless.

Also: keep positive control of your beverage at all times. From the bartender to your hand only. And if you need to get up and powder your nose, take your drink with you.

Don't lead other people into temptation. They may not be able to resist.

I think the biggest question in all of this is why do we have a generation of young adults who think entertainment is getting black out drunk. That is what is disturbing to me and it is nothing like telling a fat person not to eat. Food is necessary and it is easy for person with control issues to slip into an unhealthy pattern. Alcohol is different because you don't need it to live. I drank on campus, most of us do; but to drink until you black out regularly...I don't know that is something else.

I have been speaking to my 15 year old daughter about this. In EVERY case, the girl has been black out drunk. I have made it very clear to her that she is responsible for her own safety and that getting that drunk is dangerous. Of course, we would still support her if something terrible happened, but don't be careless in the first place. We tell kids not to drink and drive and nobody complains because that is just good sense, but for some reason no wants to talk about the drinking aspect of supposed "rape culture".

The letter from the sorority association looks like a lawyer's response to me. And what other response was there?

Can't tell undergraduates, even those under drinking age, not to drink.

Can't tell women to be careful.

The only thing the association had left to say to protect itself and its students was you can't go.

I think the biggest question in all of this is why do we have a generation of young adults who think entertainment is getting black out drunk. That is what is disturbing to me and it is nothing like telling a fat person not to eat.
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I agree. All I can think of is, maybe a lot of insecure young people think: "Well, we have to rebel in SOME way that our parents' generation didn't - so we'll just drink twice as much as they did!" Or do some other stupid behavior twice as much - even if it's just playing hooky. Or having sex three years earlier.

All I can say is, I never found the idea of getting drunk to be anything but gross and undignified - but then, I was always fearful of any situation that would make me lose control. In the same vein, I was never even tempted to ride in cars with teen drivers who had only just gotten their licenses.
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We tell kids not to drink and drive and nobody complains because that is just good sense, but for some reason no wants to talk about the drinking aspect of supposed "rape culture".

Posted by: Sheep Mom at January 29, 2015 12:31 PM
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Maybe because drunk driving very often poses more risks to OTHER people than to the driver? (I believe it has to do with drunk people being more relaxed at the moment of impact, so someone else can get killed while the driver isn't even injured.) Besides which, of course, rapists are not cars - and if they were, even cars have to be inspected before they are even allowed on the roads.

So stay in your dorm and get drunk with only women--most radical thing to do is avoid the stupid guys.

"I think the biggest question in all of this is why do we have a generation of young adults who think entertainment is getting black out drunk."

What? This cannot be. Alcohol is a drug which is legal, and this blog says legalizing drugs means no crime and responsible behavior on the part of the users!

"Alcohol is a drug which is legal, and this blog says irresponsible people will be irresponsible regardless of whether a drug is legal or not!"

Fixed it for you.

Right, Matt. I don't get blackout drunk or drive drunk. Why should I be prevented from having alcohol because some people do? Or any other substance?

Posted by: Amy Alkon Author Profile Page at January 30, 2015 4:31 AM

Computer driven cars will make much of this hysterical nanny stateism obsolete.

I also hope it loosens the grip of law enforcement paternalism, where most of their time is spent revenue collecting through traffic tickets.

I can't wait....

The real question is where will they get replacement revenue that computer driven cars eliminate? You don't expect them to take a pay cut, do you?

If they'd lower the drinking age so students could drink in public and not some private party, that would be much safer for all concerned.

"Please feel free to make honest arguments. This isn't one of them."

Okay. I'm going to work, but I'll dig this up for you.

For years, I have been insisting on impairment standards for industry, and in these arguments is where this surfaced.

People selectively quote the Bible, conveniently forgetting passages which are contradictory. It's not a stretch to have that happen in a blog.

I R A Darth Aggie, the comment was exactly the point that I think most people (you included) miss:

"One should have an internal counter: 1 drink, 2 drinks, 3, 4, etc. Knowing your limits is the hard part."

It's often not that easy. Same analogy, fat people should have an internal counter: enough food, done. It's Not That Easy. I certainly wish it was. But it's not.

And "just say no" doesn't work for this (or for most tempting things). So saying "you don't need it" doesn't help solve the problem.

And, Ben, I wanted to say, yep, I agree. I think the dynamics are a little different, but I'm not a boy, so I don't have an opinion about what to do to fix that kind of situation.

Flbeachmom,

The only solutions are to not have assholes for friends or don't get shitfaced. The vast majority of my friends are not assholes. So the last time I got shitfaced they just hauled me out of the venue and put me to bed. Other people would rob you, shave your hair, draw on you, or leave you someplace weird. Guys are less likely to be raped, but it isn't zero. I know of a few creepy older queens who like to get young men drunk and have their fun.

Personal responsibility is the only real solution.

Ben, yep, that is maturity and experience and common sense speaking.

Those are much more rare in college-aged people. Especially in freshmen, who are in some cases free for the first time to experiment, make mistakes, and gain the kind of personal experience that gives one all that good stuff. Not to mention make new friends, with no knowledge of their previous (anti-)social tendencies.

Which is why the focus is on college as opposed to those who stay in town, and go to work and hang out with people they already know.