I guess if you see your parents and your children and other family members as a burden, this makes perfect sense.

But this individual living expectation is a 20th, 21st century American quirk, and not the norm in most of the world or any time in history for that matter.

I want to add that from this poisonous notion that every individual or nuclear family should have their own little piece of private real estate springs the even more poisonous notion that if they cant achieve it on their own, the government should be footing the bill for their illusion of independence.

Amy Says:

"It's possible that kids have so gotten used to supreme comfort that they just aren't willing to struggle to make ends meet in a crappy apartment."

It is also possible that the reality of rapidly increasing costs of living coupled with flat wages has altered the economy in such a way over the last ~30 years that your personal experience is no longer relevant.

According to the data presented here:

https://www.apartmentlist.com/rentonomics/rent-growth-since-1960/

The cost burden for renters in the 1980's was ~35% and the current cost burden for renters is ~50%.

Taking all of this into account it seems more plausible for these shifts in behavior to be related to rational financial choices associated with real changes in the economy as opposed to an unwillingness to struggle that you suggest.

Based purely upon the numbers the struggle of the average 20 year old today would be ~40% worse than your personal struggle in "an 8 x 10 room".

To put it in finer terms... to have equivalent financial struggle they would need to rent a space that was an 8 x 6 room.

A person living in such a room if they owned a queen sized mattress would have 1 foot between the edge of the bed and the wall (even a twin takes up almost half of the floor space)... and forget about a toilet in such a living space if you plan on sleeping there.

The world is a different place today and it isn't simply because young twenty somethings are overly sensitive or coddled. There are real financial differences that need to be accounted for.

That doesn't show what you claim it shows Artemis. You need median $/sq ft to make that claim. Just showing the cost isn't enough. If the apartments are larger then people are just willing to spend more of their income on housing than previous generations.

I couldn't find any decent charts on apartment square footage so I'm not saying you are wrong. Just that the data doesn't support your point. For homes the inflation adjusted price since 1970 has gone up ~20% but the size of the homes have gone up ~100% so the price per sq ft has actually gone down.

The flat wage thing is another interesting one since the costs of a job haven't been flat. Instead most increases in job costs have gone into benefits instead of wages. The majority of which went into health insurance costs. So it isn't that people aren't making more money. It is that they are spending it in ways they aren't aware of and probably don't want to.

Another thing to consider is the disappearance of low-end rentals, things like boarding houses, SROs, etc. Laws have changed, giving renters rights they never had when you could rent an upstairs room from Widow Bradley or a basement apartment in the Smith's brownstone. And non-professional landlords' legal and financial liabilities in renting rooms and providing meals have increased substantially as well.

Apartment companies are trying, in major cities, to increase the supply of cheap rental units with tiny apartments. However, concerns over traffic, population density, and utility usage (sewage, water, power, etc.) have slowed the development of buildings with smaller low-cost units.

My own daughter and son-in-law live in our garage, which they have spruced up by adding a cute little bathroom and mini-kitchen. It has been hinted that after they have babies (in the garage, like possums), perhaps my husband and I will trade places with them.

"It has been hinted..." Nice use of passive voice, there. But the whole swapping places notion seems more a matter of character than economics.

Although I have been a bit worried about the inflation I've observed in our local housing market, I claim that the problem of housing becoming utterly unaffordable is largely a function of the major urban areas, the ones that have had one-party Democrat rule for decades. Their anti-development regulations and general attitude (getting a construction permit in such an area is DMV x 1000, unless you are well connected) set up a market where the movers and shakers have tony gated neighborhoods, while the working class and a lot of the middle class are priced out of the market and have to commute a long way to their jobs.

There's a self-reinforcing downward spiral between purveyors of low-cost rentals and HUD. It's illegal to refuse to rent to HUD placements, and HUD often rents in big blocks which makes the landlord's job easier. But the welfare recipients tend to drive out the working class. My observation, from a relative who has had the experience of living in such housing: if you live there and you work, the welfare recipients watch your unit and note your work schedule. Within a few weeks, your apartment is getting broken into nearly every day while you are at work. Police won't even bother to investigate, because they know that if they go asking around, all of the welfare people will just say "I didn't see nuttin'".

Pretty soon the working people get disgusted and move out; the landlord rents more units to HUD, and eventually the development becomes a hotbed of crime and starts causing problems for the surrounding neighborhoods. Cities respond to this by severely restricting how much and where low-rent housing can be built. That which is build winds up being welfare compounds in the city, while the working class moves out to the sticks where they can afford property.

@Conan: "Apartment companies are trying, in major cities, to increase the supply of cheap rental units with tiny apartments."

That kind of dovetails with what my middle daughter was telling me recently. She's interning in the UK right now, and living in a dorm that supports the University of Manchester during the school year. This boy she's been seeing* told her that it's not uncommon even for working graduates to live in dorm-like accommodations in large cities like London.

Companies are trying to do it here in the States, too. Googling "adult dorm living" came up with lots of hits, among them a Fortune article about venture capital funding adult dorms on the Coasts. Jezebel, however, seems to sneer at the whole idea, for reasons its commentors don't all seem to buy.

*I've met him, and didn't immediately want to go all Al Bundy on him, so I suppose that's something.

No one takes advantage of you without your permission. If LW doesn't like the current arrangements or the attitude of her "tenants", then she has to woman up and tell them to get their own place. As my dad told me recently, "I didn't want it to be too comfortable for you. Then you'd never leave!" It is the parents' responsibility to make sure their children are capable and eager to survive on their own.

This is a failure of parenting, period. The hints of moving the parents into their own garage eliminate any claim to life costing more nowadays being the problem. My parents lived in the Rio motel in austin while waiting for slightly-less-awful quonset-hut married student housing to open up at UT. Anyone familiar with austin knows how awful the Rio was.

Hubby and I lived in a cinderblock apartment when first married. Then, a tiny house in the ghetto. Then, a nice suburban home. Now, in our 40s, weve bought a halfmillion dollar ranchette. People who dont struggle become entitled. My parents made sure to show all us kids places they lived before they "made it", so we would know what standard to expect as young adults.

My first apartment was one half of a converted basement, my second a tiny studio. I had a landline, my childhood bedroom set, the card table, and a black and white tv with an antenna. I cooked all my own meals too.

These kids today want to start out in a 1,000 sq. ft. place with granite countertops and travertine tile. God forbid they live in a dump with a couple of roommates. [/get off my lawn!]

The woman with the adult, childless, married daughter should kick the garage dwellers to the curb ASAP before she find herself paying a mortgage to live in her garage while the moochers have the run of the house.

Most people that I know didnt have childern and grandchildren so they could treat them with the same level of passive disinterest in their welfare and safety as the panhadler on the street corner.

You want your children living in high crime areas next to gangbangers if that is all they can afford on their own? Or do you want them to be in a safe place with good schools?

A lot of the carping on this board about freeloading family members is just mean spirted uber libertarian narcissicim. .

If you didnt raise your children to be decent caring individuals who shoulder their share of financial and family responsibilities, whose fault is that?

Did you all miss the fact that not only did the adult daughter bring her hubby and dog, but also an adult friend who is a school teacher?? Um, hello, the three of them need to GTFO of mom and dad's and rent a place together since they can't seem to make it on their own. There is zero reason why 3 working, able-bodied adults are living at the parents'.

My kids are all married, two of them struggle and I occasionally pitch in a few bucks when they're strapped and need something. They know that they could come home if things reached that level, but they know it wouldn't be easy. My job isn't to make things comfy cozy for them. My job as a parent was to make sure they could survive on their own. My oldest daughter did come home at one point several years ago with an infant and a toddler. There were rules, she didn't abide by the rules, and after several warnings I kicked her out (the kids stayed, not their fault). She got her act together within a few weeks and got her own place. I will always be a soft place for my kids to fall, but after the initial fall, it's time to get to work and handle your business.

Anyone familiar with austin knows how awful the Rio was.

*Googles "Rio Motel Austin."* *Notes location.*

LOL. My, my how this city has changed.

But this individual living expectation is a 20th, 21st century American quirk, and not the norm in most of the world or any time in history for that matter.

Multi-generational houses are the norm for most of my husband's family and some of mine, too. These situations work because they are mutually beneficial and mutually supportive. And I also give some side-eye to the notion that kids "moving back" or staying in the family homestead is automatically some sign of arrested development.

Reading the original article, it would seem the author's problem isn't an issue with multi-generational living or kids coming back to "the nest," but the fact that she raised humans who stash trash everywhere and who don't contribute equally to maintenance or chores. It would also seem that the author has some unhealthy issues of her own, like losing sleep at night when her adult offspring stay out late.

I like having our own space, so we pay for it, but I'm not about to say that kids living with their parents into adulthood makes anyone less independent.

I guess if you see your parents and your children and other family members as a burden, this makes perfect sense.

But this individual living expectation is a 20th, 21st century American quirk, and not the norm in most of the world or any time in history for that matter.
_________________________________

Nicely said, Isab. Miss Manners said something very similar, maybe in the 1990s, though I can't track it down right now. It included something like "how civilized are we as a society when we assume that no self-respecting parents want to have their adult children living with them - or that no one counts as an adult unless he/she DOESN'T live at the parents' house?"

This is one area where she doesn't overlap with psychologist John Rosemond, who NEVER admits that such arrangements can be healthy or healthful - in America. (Unfortunately, he's also implied, more than once, that girls should marry as early as possible - no doubt so they'll have little or no chance or right to live on their own and make themselves "impure.")

From his column in 1995:

http://www.spokesman.com/stories/1995/nov/06/children-need-learning-not-relationships/

...In all likelihood, there will be many days when their children will not like them, and a good number of days when the feeling will be mutual. But, you see, children aren’t supposed to like their parents that much anyway. They are, let me remind you, supposed to want to leave home. And let me assure you, this has nothing to do with loving one’s parents.

Speaking in Nashville recently, I asked the 500-plus people in the audience to raise their hands if they truly liked their parents. Maybe 10 hands went up, which didn’t surprise me, because I didn’t like my parents that much. I wouldn’t, for example, have chosen them as friends. They annoyed me, inconvenienced me and made me angry. Then I asked this same audience for a show of hands if they loved their parents. There may have been a few who sat with both hands in their laps, but I couldn’t locate them. Yes, I too loved my annoying, frustrating parents. But I couldn’t wait to leave home, which simply means they did a good job. They convinced me I could make a better life for myself than they were willing to make for me. And, by gosh, I did!

Today’s parents, by all accounts, are not doing a good job of convincing their children likewise. When I was 20, I was married and on my own. The average age of economic emancipation in my generation was, in fact, 20. Today, the average age is approaching 25. In my time, for a child to live at home well into his or her 20s was considered indication of something very odd in the parent-child relationship. Today, it is considered normal.

And, by the by, lest you think this is because it’s far more difficult for today’s young person to get out on his own, it’s not. The researchers who discovered this trend were unable to explain it in terms of economics or the availability of jobs. They said, “The children of this generation have been given too much by parents who have been generally guilty of selfinduced nearsightedness” or words to that very damning effect...

(snip)

And, from Ann Landers, in 1983:

Dear Ann Landers: Can you stand a letter that disagrees with the conciliatory tone most of your respondents have expressed in regard to adult children who have moved back with their parents because they have lost their jobs? The young man who wrote resented being asked personal questions such as "Where are you going?" You said, "Talk to them. They should respect your wishes." Why not lay it right out on the rug, Ann? That kid is invading the privacy of his parents' home. He is interfering with their plans in more ways than one, from cooking meals to going out, staying home quietly or having guests in. It inevitably means more work for mother. Unless he is cooking for himself, cleaning up after himself, doing his own laundry, entertaining his friends elsewhere or paying for room and board, he has no right to complain. I am willing to bet a dollar to a donut that his parents did not go home to their parents when things got rough. I know I didn't, and my parents COULDN'T.- We Made It On Our Own (Waterbury, Conn.)

Dear Water: Let's face it, this generation is not as rugged as we were, and a lot of it is our fault. Our children have had the disadvantage of too many advantages. We had to make it on our own. They didn't. That old safety net we put under them was mighty comforting. It let them know, "it's OK if you lose your footing. You won't fall far. We'll catch you." Love doesn't mean protecting your kids from the lumps of the real world. It means letting them handle adversity on their own and learning, firsthand, how to cope with mistakes, failure, bum breaks and tough luck. This is what separates the men from the boys and the girls from the women.

The key question is how much the younger generation is contributing to the larger family. Are they paying rent? Do they provide their own meals? Do they even provide their own furniture or clothes? There isn't anything inherently wrong with having a multi-generational household. But everyone has to be contributing. If the kids aren't acting like adults enabling that behavior is good for neither the parent nor the child.

Eventually the kids need to grow up. If only for the reason everyone dies. Some day their parents won't be there to take care of them. Better to learn how to take care of yourself at 20 than at 60.

This paragraph from the linked article seems germane:

We love our children dearly and would give them our last kidneys without pause. But living in such close proximity to our grown kids, we see things we don’t want to see, like their crappy eating habits, or disregard for appropriate hygiene, or wasteful spending, or lackadaisical job hunting, or excessive napping. We see the number of beer bottles in the recycle bin and the home pregnancy tests bought, it appears, in bulk.

Well, that dovetails with the earlier bit about the daughter and the husband and the dog and the completely unrelated "adult friend" who moved in as well. This woman is a doormat, a lousy parent, or both.

"how civilized are we as a society when we assume that no self-respecting parents want to have their adult children living with them - or that no one counts as an adult unless he/she DOESN'T live at the parents' house?" ~ lenona at August 10, 2017 10:35 AM

It's not about not wanting them to live with you, it's about them getting independent lives. And, yes, they can do that while living in their parents' house, but not while living as teenagers there.

Well, my daughters are 32 and 29, and never left. Of course, the DC area cost of living, and their medical issues also have a lot to do with that. . .

Well, since it was Miss Manners talking (again, paraphrased), one would naturally assume she meant POLITE adult children. Meaning, of course, adults who assume the responsibilities of adults and respect their landlords and their rules as such, whether the renter and the landlord are related or not. Of course, self-respecting parents would not want to live with disrespectful people - or anyone who refuses to grow up.

She's not quite consistent in this 1984 column - the implication is, at first, that one's friends and relatives should be allowed to make excuses for their failures all the time, as opposed to strangers like store clerks - but I still like it. (You have to scroll up a bit.)

https://books.google.com/books?id=Ju1XvqoMookC&pg=PA343&lpg=PA343&dq=miss+manners+%22nation+of+wounded+birds%22&source=bl&ots=5JvaBMK3BU&sig=tSKSdliFCO2NvWyfkLMB2LgdLv0&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj5hZi7ys3VAhVETSYKHTsPD1AQ6AEIJjAA#v=onepage&q=miss%20manners%20%22nation%20of%20wounded%20birds%22&f=false

Quote:

"...The truly sympathetic and considerate person never asks sympathy of those to whom he does not offer it. Thus recitals of troubles, other than those made to professionals in a position to help, such as doctors, teachers, and bartenders, are confined to family and close friends, whose troubles one also shares.

"The need to do one's duty, whether it is a moral, personal, or professional duty, cannot be satisfied by explaining why one hasn't done it. The explanation needed, at times of failure, is how one plans to make up for it.

"Sympathy, when someone has failed to do what was required, is due not to the person who failed but to the person whose expectations he has failed. Instead of asking for understanding or pity with the confession of error, one apologizes for the inconvenience it has caused..."

Keith,

The key question is do your daughters contribute to the family. If they are pulling their weight and helping out either with money or labor then there really isn't an issue. But if you are just helping them to remain as children instead of growing up, if you are enabling an unsustainable life style, then that is your fault for poor parenting.

Now, you mentioned medical issues. That can cover a lot of things. A child with downs syndrome will probably never be independent. It just isn't an option. But adolescent diabetes is a different story. What your children are capable of is for you as a parent to decide.

In college, way back when, used bedding seemed to me to be a good way to get bedbugs and back pain. So I bought cement blocks, set it up with plywood on top (trimmed off to 6 ft), foam on that then blankets and I had a brand new bed for about $15.
Twice after marriage when we moved into places we had empty rooms with no furniture for quite a while. I think indeed that kids are unwilling to save and unwilling to be deprived.
Expectations have risen. No one will drive a car like the old VWs with no heat or AC or radio. Young people like lavish weddings

cc, some of the more important lessons I remember from the Tightwad Gazette were:

Don't buy short-term luxuries (like movie tickets or takeout food) when you could buy long-term luxuries instead, not to mention the need to pay for rent. It adds up shockingly fast. Granted, like the author, not everyone thinks a solid antique bed IS a luxury, but I digress.

Don't waste time on dating people who do not appreciate your tightwad skills, whether it's yard-saling or cooking gourmet meals for a picnic instead of going to restaurants. Money fights are, after all, one of the top reasons for divorce.

Don't treat time differently than money. Time is money. So, instead of playing video games, pick useful hobbies instead, like carpentry, which can EARN you money instead of costing you. (Face it - unless video games are your paying job, you'll spend far too much time on playing for fun.) One can also get exercise by doing chores and walking on one's errands instead of going to the gym. You save time that way too.

Of course, these skills/attitudes have to be taught early to kids - and often, subtly, if you don't want them to rebel.

☑ Isab at August 9, 2017 11:20 PM
☑ Isab at August 10, 2017 9:09 AM

After two freshman semesters in a dorm, I was home for six weeks before moving into an apartment with a pal, and then out everymore... Because the money was available to do that.

It wasn't an exercise in independent courage or good character or anything.

That was supposed to say "evermore."

But this is a good comment thread.

So. THREE "adults" can't make their own way, and TWO MORE of them are Mom's responsibility in addition to her child, who has failed to fly.

Where is this reasonable, again?

So. THREE "adults" can't make their own way, and TWO MORE of them are Mom's responsibility in addition to her child, who has failed to fly.

Where is this reasonable, again?

Radwaste at August 10, 2017 7:06 PM

It probably isnt, but this idiot said yes to all three and the dog without apparently putting a time limit on it, or requiring a plan for three people to get their own place.

What most of us are saying is there is nothing inherently wrong with an extended family living arrangement which can be in everyone's best interest if it involves responsible people.

In general the same people who are abusing their parents generosity would most likely be abusing their roomates if they were living with a group of non related individuals.

Don't turn yourself into a doormat and then blame someone or something else.

My own daughter and son-in-law live in our garage, which they have spruced up by adding a cute little bathroom and mini-kitchen. It has been hinted that after they have babies (in the garage, like possums), perhaps my husband and I will trade places with them.

If they ever "hinted" such a thing to me, their eviction notice would be on their door the next day.

When necessity dictates that you impose upon your parents' home, you fall all over yourselves making yourselves helpful and taking up as little space as possible.

They get to stay in their bedrooms, and you, if need be, will live in a tent in the backyard.

And you don't have kids. Kids are a luxury item reserved only for those who live on their own. And if you never happen to attain that level of stability during your child-bearing age, too fucking bad. Then you live the rest of your life with that unfulfilled dream.

It has been hinted that after they have babies (in the garage, like possums), perhaps my husband and I will trade places with them.

Then hint back (or be an adult and flat-out say) to them that perhaps instead of spending money sprucing up the garage and having children, they'll save money and buy or rent a little post-war cottage in the less-trendy section of town.

The objective here is not to kick the kids out so you can cook spaghetti naked and frolic with your spouse on the couch in broad daylight, but to see the children develop into autonomous and independent adults - so they can raise their children to be autonomous and independent as well. If that involves living in their parents house, so be it. Hint: it more often than not involves getting out on one's own, if only for a while.

Having the children living in the garage and hinting to Mom and Dad to switch places and give up their house and bedroom so the children can have children is not the way to accomplish that objective.

After all, if your parents had wanted to sleep in the garage "like possums," they'd have built it out years ago. I'm sure their retirement plans did not include figuring out how to cover up the motor oil stain on their bedroom floor with a nice rug from Bed, Bath, and Beyond or arranging the dresser so it doesn't block access to the ShopVac.

While the economic reality may be different now, the path to autonomy and independence still does not spend a great deal of time meandering through your parents' garage. Young adults should want to experience life on their own, removed from their parents and the cocoon of childhood memories. Perhaps to return some day and take care of the parents, but to have persevered despite the worst life could throw at them until then.

Raise you children to have autonomy and independence; that and a good job. After all, they're the ones who will pick (and pay for) your nursing home.

Raise your children to have autonomy and independence; that and a good job. After all, they're the ones who will pick (and pay for) your nursing home. ~ Conan the Grammarian at August 11, 2017 5:41 AM

That and the brutal reality that some day you won't be there to support them. They'll need those long-ignored survival skills then, when they won't have you on the phone to guide them through their first stock purchase, their first house buying experience, or how to calm a colicky baby at 4am.

Your call.

Ben Says:

"That doesn't show what you claim it shows Artemis. You need median $/sq ft to make that claim. Just showing the cost isn't enough. If the apartments are larger then people are just willing to spend more of their income on housing than previous generations."

We can quibble about details here Ben, but the overall point is that the data shows that renters today are far more cost burdened than they were 30 years ago.

If you have evidence to support the claim that apartments are suddenly larger now than before I would be happy to take that into consideration.

However it seems unlikely that all of the apartments from the 80s have been demolished or renovated since then to increase their square footage.

Those buildings still exist in roughly the same form.

Yes those building exist but there are lots of apartments that have been built since then too. Your data didn't show what you claimed it showed.

I haven't found data either way for apartments. For houses the price per sq ft has dropped but the median total sq ft has increased. In the end the median price for homes has increased. I suspect you will see the exact same trend with apartments but I have no evidence either way. A quick google search didn't turn anything up one way or the other.

Other favorite T.G. tips of mine, in chronological order, pretty much (all from the 1990s):

Investment purchases and disposable purchases. (While some long-term purchases may seem like luxuries to some, at least they are not short-term luxuries. Also, if you find it shocking to hear that someone spent more than $2,000 last year on movies and meals out, why are you already spending $40 every week on those items when it comes to the same thing?)

On page 83 (of vol. 1), she talks about choosing categories of books to own.

On page 113, she talks about a temporary postal scale made from a ruler, a pencil and some coins - and how the parts have multiple uses, not just one, and so the space they take up is worth it.

Price books for groceries - about learning how much to buy or not buy when things go on sale.

Dating - learning how to find frugal people without appearing ungenerous.

Baking substitutes - such as soy flour for eggs in muffins, which makes them less likely to fall apart when done.

Supermarket scales - how to use them to compare bags of produce, fresh or bruised, that are not sold per pound.

Egg price chart, page 236. If 12 large eggs cost $1.69, jumbo eggs are ONLY a bargain if they cost under $2 or so.

(end of vol. 1?)

"Calculating Pay-Back Time" (is doing it yourself cost efficient, and how much do you enjoy a certain task?)

"Calculating Your Cost-Per-Muffin" (a chart of how much flour costs per cup, vanilla costs per teaspoon, etc - since prices change, this is best for comparing the RELATIVE cost of one type of breakfast vs. another)

"Creative Deprivation" (she said she restricts treats not to save money, primarily, but because "I just think there's nothing sadder than a jaded 8-year-old." She then describes how her kids will devour the rare ice cream treat "in absolute silence, savoring every drip. I was very proud of my brood for being able to appreciate this simple treat....")

"The Fine Art of Negotiation"

On using freezers efficiently in your cooking - and feminine hygiene products that are much cheaper overall (The Keeper)

Turning off the pilot light on the boiler at the end of winter

"Wealth, Poverty and Frugality" (on learning and teaching that frugality is smart, not shameful, and how to stop saying "we can't afford it" to kids instead of giving other explanations)

"Money Saving Hobbies" (and Depression-era stories)

Reader tip: Always accept things friends are trying to get rid of, even if you have to take it directly to the dump. Otherwise, they may stop offering things you might need!

"Three Steps to a Frito-Free Child"

(end of vol. 2 or so)

On vegetarianism: One reader (in 1994) says to read "Laurel's Kitchen" and not "Diet for a Small Planet" - unless you want to be turned off

Cheap courier travel (not sure how this has changed since 9/11)

"War and Peas" (about getting kids to eat what they're served and still have happy, laughter-filled mealtimes - her own words)

"Focus Before You Feast" (about curbing one's general appetites - sort of like the advice "don't shop when you're hungry")

Overripe banana recipes - my improvised favorite is frozen chunks of banana with milk, cocoa powder, and vanilla or raspberry syrup

"The Fall (and Rise?) of Thrift" (about the 1990 book "The Decline of Thrift in America: Our Cultural Shift from Saving to Spending" by history professor David M. Tucker)

"The Unmagical Time-Management Method" (about how managing one's life is often about what you AVOID doing, to save time)

"A New Way to Look at Used Things" (e.g., you can't tell a used Lego from a new one, so why not spend, say, a handful of change for a bucket of used Legos at a yard sale rather than spend those few coins on a tiny new breakable toy?)

"Wow Know-How" (about calculating how much is something worth to you - if, say, you like to eat out at cheap places but it costs 10 times what it would cost you to make it at home - with on-sale groceries - can you REALLY say the food tastes 10 times better at the diner? Not likely.)

"Power Yard-Saling" (how to shop efficiently at those sales)

College and whether it's always worth it or not

"Mutual Mooching" (about returning the spirit of cooperation between neighbors - the Vietnamese refugee experience in America gets mentioned)

"Literary Legacy" (on reading aloud to kids)

"Taming the Tube" (why TV isn't all bad)

I just got my oldest and his wife to move out after living in our basement for 3 of the 4 years they've been married. They are unbearable slobs - we've had to replace the carpet in the room they were using, we repossessed a dozen or more plates, spoons, and bowls they had buried in crap, and my family room is finally free of accumulated junk. They are now living in some other unsuspecting guy's nice basement apartment. Good luck to him and them.