What an odd and self-defeating notion: "clean" versions of American-Chinese fast food. Why not just go to a Chinese restaurant that has a "Chinese menu" and take a chance on what may be more healthy and delicious than General Tso?

I regularly get pan-fried dumplings off the Chinese menu that take half an hour to be served because the dumpling skins are fresh, the fillings are custom-made and it takes like a grandma made it. Same with eggplant, green beans, bok choy and other sides. It's filling, nutritious, delicious and doesn't make me feel salt-bombed or "icky" the next day.

Why would anyone want to replicate a "clean" version of the Burger King hamburger? It's not my jam but if that's what you want, who wouldn't prefer that to the ersatz version?

(And what kind of restaurant — Chinese or otherwise — fucks up rice to the point of inedibility? I have a $20 rice cooker that turns out perfect rice in 45 seconds of "prep" [measuring] and 40 minutes of cooking.)

I sometimes make vegan faux chinese meals, better lock me up

Something about the way they diss the food tells me this writer already had his mind set on shitting on the restaurant.

I know food critics love to tear a restaurant apart but this reads more like a Gawker-like hit piece to me.

And as someone who knows damn well how to fuck up rice, the pictures of it doesn't match his description.

And how bad can rice be?

The only places in the world that worry about "cultural appropriation" is the west.

Everywhere else is fine with it. In fact, they find it flattering.

Perhaps you remember an American college student, Chinese by descent, named Jeremy Lam who instigated a campaign of harassment on Twitter against an 18-year-old high school senior for wearing a cheongsam to her senior prom, tweeting, "My culture is not your goddamned prom dress!"

Couple of problems. First, Jeremy Lam is no part of Chinese culture. He was born in the States and has lived here his entire life.

Culture is about art, religion, use of technology, style of dress, language and customs, none of which Jeremy Lam is a part of. His ancestry is Chinese, but his culture is not.

Second, and most importantly, the Chinese themselves were not at all in sympathy with Lam. On the contrary, they were delighted that this student chose to wear a cheongsam to her prom. And an outpouring of goodwill came to her from not just China, but from nearby nations, too.

A woman from India even offered to make her a sari to wear to her senior cotillion.

In a related incident, a woman who claimed to be Japanese and living in Japan shut down a Tumblr-user who was calling out a white woman who threw a Japanese-themed tea party for her little girl's birthday.

Cultural appropriation is simply about trying to tell white people what to do.

Jeremy Lam, for instance, doesn't seem to think there's anything wrong with Chinese businessmen who wear European-style business suits. Only high school girls who wear cheongsams.

The quest to untangle all the ethnic groups and restore "purity" is one that makes Don Quixote's quest look doable. Culture is a mish-mash and always has been. With travel, immigration, movies, TV and the internet, the genie is thoroughly out of the bottle.
There is also a strange idea, that copying another culture's X is to steal X, but that culture still has X. Did the girl who wore the chinese dress to prom steal such that chinese can no longer wear it? No. Was she making fun? no. (not that I object to making fun of chinese people).
I know of a Persian restaurant that used to have Persian cooks, but they kept quitting and opening their own restaurants, so he now has Mexican cooks. Quality went down but I can understand his concerns.
I also find it hilarious when people defend fake cultural stuff like General Tso's chicken or fortune cookies or Cinco de mayo (not a real mexican holiday). The sombrero is not a sacred symbol of mexico. St Patty's day is actually insulting to real Irish since it is all about getting drunk (a stereotype of the Irish) but the Irish embrace it anyway because they aren't dicks.

Jeremy Lam, for instance, doesn't seem to think there's anything wrong with Chinese businessmen who wear European-style business suits. ~ Patrick at April 14, 2019 10:43 AM

When Nelson Mandela emerged from 27 years of captivity, he wore a Western style suit. Not a dashiki or any sort of tribal dress, but a suit and tie, the global uniform of men who mean to be taken seriously in the world.

I watched his emergence with friends from South Africa who were overjoyed at his release and not one of them commented on his choice of attire.

And how bad can rice be?

Rice can end up mushy, or dry, it can be burnt at the bottom of the pot and the stench of carbonized carbs spreads all over it.

One thing rice can't be is undercooked and mushy at the same time. Such miracle would meant the food critic taking a picture of the messy rice but he did not, and food critics love to take picture of shitty meals.

Remember: The offendatrons couldn't shut it down via Twitter mob, so the natural route for them is to do trash talk reviews.

Important new coinage: "Offendatrons" ✔

We know the starting conclusion was that they were bad because they were the wrong race, and therefore, they have to be destroyed.

Who believes that the judgment on the rice was fair? It's probably a lie, too. The food's probably pretty good.

There's no reason to believe this is any more truthful than the woke reviews of movies by professional critics.

Who is this General Tso and why are you serving me his chicken?

What this conveniently leaves out is that immigrants come here, try cooking their own food from the old country and doing the best they can with the ingredients available. Some go on to open restaurants, and tune their recipes to the palate of a wider audience.

Authentic? Not a chance. Fusion? Oh yeah.

I thought “Wok In, Take Out” was pretty clever. I guess I am insufficiently woke. Does the “work” surgery where they remove your sense of humor hurt?

“Work” surgery should have been “woke” surgery. Damn you, autocorrect!

Just to be clear - what these people are complaining about is that Lucky Lee's is offering a lighter version of the typical casual Chinese Food you find in American cities and suburban strip malls.

This is like complaining that Chuck E Cheese isn't run by a real mouse.

American Chinese Food is almost nothing like food served in China. It's actually an American creation with a slight resemblance to Cantonese food.

The funny thing is that Lucky Lee's preparation is actually closer to what the Chinese prefer, which is without all the salt, weird candying and heavy oil cooking.

"Who is this General Tso and why are you serving me his chicken?"

The truth is no one knows. Yes there is a famous Chinese general named Tso. But he never ate this chicken. General Tso's Chicken wasn't even served in China until a few years ago. It is a wholly American product.

My wife's stepmother was from Italy. I remember her telling us about pizza in Italy: "If you ever go to Italy, don't order pizza. You'll be disappointed. Pizza as we know it is entirely an American creation. And it's much better."

As for the rice: It can be bad if you really overcook it. My maternal grandmother was notorious in the family for seriously overcooking rice and pasta, to the point that it turned into a jelly-like mass in the pot. For some reason, she liked it that way. Everyone else thought it was disgusting. If we were eating Thanksgiving dinner at her house, my mom always volunteered to make the mac and cheese.

And as for cultural appropriation: Pretty much all of modernity is a product of Anglo culture. People who are concerned about "cultural appropriation" need to live in a 19th-century house with no electricity or plumbing, cook all their meals over a fire, use tallow for light, and treat all their medical conditions with leeches.

"One thing rice can't be is undercooked and mushy at the same time."

To which I say, hold my beer and learn. Yes it can be both over and under cooked at the same time. Mush on the outside and hard on the inside. It isn't easy to do and usually requires cheap crappy rice but I've done it and given the distractions my kids give me while cooking I will probably do it again.

You will never find northern chinese food here in America. Most of the chinese who came here came from coastal cities simply because they could. N china food is very spicy, serves more noodles, and serves doughy rolls. If you go to Chinatown and go eat where the restaurant is full of chinese people you will find more authentic food, but it can be very weird, with lots of seafood that we don't eat elsewhere. Chinese food has had to adapt to what Americans will buy.

Chinese food has had to adapt to what Americans will buy. ~ cc at April 15, 2019 11:36 AM

It also has had to adapt to what Americans will sell. If the chef can't get the ingredients, he'll hafta make a substitution or two. Luckily for that chef, our capitalist system encourages people to sell what people will buy. Asian markets are sprouting up all over the place with Asian-specific foodstuffs.

Speaking of cultural appropriation, isn't that what it is when all these people call in after the Notre Dame Cathedral fire and claim that even though they're atheists the feel a special connection to it?