The Coffee House
Welcome to caffeinated hell. You're either a barrista or somebody who patronizes Starbucks or other coffeehouses, and I want to hear about all the jerks you've encountered while coffeeing up.
Here's my most recent:
They're so nice at the Starbucks I go to on Sundays, taking super care of my friend Tom, who's in a motorized wheelchair, and being really friendly and kind to all the customers.If they aren't busy, and you order some kind of heated sandwich, they'll pop over and give it to you. But, a couple days ago, this man snarled, "Where's my bagel?!" to one of the employees (not the one who took his order, apparently, either).
She told him it was probably on the counter by the oven, and then went and got it for him. He barely looked up when he took it from her.
"I was under the impression you don't have table service here," I said, wink-wink.
"We don't," she said.
You've got to love a guy who buys a $2.95 breakfast sandwich and expects snap-snap table service, too, like he's at Alain Ducasse.
Comments
Note to the utter buttwad sitting all the way across a big Starbucks from me and talking in a tone of voice appropriate for delivering a monologue to a huge auditorium when the mic is out:
NO NEED TO SHOUT.
Unless you’re a comedian with a couple of Comedy Central specials under your belt (and we know from your dull and uninteresting conversation that you are most certainly not), chances are, YOUR CONVERSATION IS NOT AMUSING THE REST OF US, just irritating us down to our atoms.
Lucky for you, I am not violent, just HOSTILE.
Posted by: Amy Alkon at September 2, 2010 12:55 AM
I was a barista at Starbucks a few years ago in my mid-twentys in a small New England city. I generally really enjoyed the job, but there was this one regular customer who would come in and order a triple grande soy 3 splenda cappuccino with EXTRA VELVETY foam. She would specify this every time. It is hard as hell to make extra velvety foam with soy milk and we would end up having to steam up a ton of soy milk to get the desired quantity of foam. She would often bring her drink back and request it be remade. Then she would take a giant stack of napkins, use one or two, and leave the rest unused on the table. Drove me nuts. Also once she was trying to get my attention while I was helping another customer and said "hello!" For crying out loud lady! Can I at least get an "excuse me?"
Also, one time this guy came in I didn't recognize. He said something like "dont you remember me?"
Me: I'm sorry, I don't
Him: well we've met before!
Me: really?
Him: remember? It was a moonlit night? You were on top?
Pretty sure I turned bright red and walked backstage.
Another time a customer had ordered a drink and was eyeing the pastry case.
Me: anything of interest to you?
Him: well, let me see
And he turned his attention to me, raised his hand and twirled his finger like if you were asking someone to spin around. Basically he wanted to look at my ass. It was about 6am and this guy was about 45 and a regular customer. Quickly got a reputation as being a major creep with the girls there.
Basically, some men think that the friendliness mandated by the job of barista (or waitress, or golf cart beer girl--I've got many more stories like this from different jobs) is an invitation for a sexual comment or advance, when it almost never is.
Posted by: Lindsayloo at November 22, 2011 3:48 AM
Amy, I thought of you yesterday. I confronted a young lady at a Starbucks who was yammering on her Skype (laptop and all) in a voice that the whole restaurant could hear. What I *wanted* to do was ridicule her and point out just HOW VERY WRONG SHE WAS in chasing half the customers out of there. Well, that's their problem if they'd rather leave than grow a pair (of whichever). I waited for her to finish her call, then asked if she had a moment.
I was polite, but I didn't take any crap. Your apology while no doubt sincere, is misplaced. The problem is not that you don't realize your voice carries; it's that you're not behaving as if you are in a room full of real people--or you would have "realized" that your voice does indeed carry. These people (I gestured, and saw that "we" had an audience by this time) don't cease to exist because you're wearing headphones. I hope little Haylee gets her gifts straightened out, and say Hello to Aunt Carrie and Uncle Kenny; and yes I agree that modern technology is amazing. Anyway, I waited for you to finish before I spoke, and I hope your holidays go really well.
You know what happened then? Absolutely nothing. I went back to my reading and note-taking ("A Data Architecture for IT Service Management", White Paper by Betz, 2005), and she got on with her web surfing, and the remaining folks in the restaurant did not clap, did not raise a chorus of Hell Yeah!, and if they all cocked their heads while smiling warmly in assent, well, I was reading. Missed it.
Which was great, because I saw her again today at Taco Bell, and at that moment I realized why I was so glad I was polite about it. I wasn't angry or indignant about it anymore, and you *really* need that to justify acting poorly in response to being treated poorly. I was happy to have found that seemingly narrow zone of effective but polite where I was proud of my conduct not only in the moment, but going forward as well. How would I have felt if I had been beastly the day before? Like a beast.
Thanks for the inspiration!
Posted by: Haakon Dahl at November 27, 2011 4:52 PM
I have a few stories about the time I worked at Starbucks [and what's amazing to me is that now that I work at a local 'legit' coffeeshop, I have virtually no rude people come in, even in a rude location]!
I was having somewhat of a normal blah day, and then got a phone call explaining that my grandmother had died [this was Thanksgiving, by the way]. I walked to the back and started crying pretty hard, but had to compose myself as I was still working and there for another hour. After I'd calmed down, I was sniffling a bit, blew my nose and walked out of the back room behind the counter.
I had not even SPOKEN or MOVED from my position when a customer in line said to me, "I really hope you wash your hands before making my drink." I lost it again. This woman was so rude. I was lucky to be working with such an amazing team as my coworker spoke directly to the woman and said, "Excuse me, ma'am, my coworker has just learned that her grandmother has died and is on break, but I can help you over here." [as she was next to the register]. I really hope that lady thinks before she says something like that to another human being who is obviously upset.
______________
Another minor one. One thing that really boiled me was when a customer would SLAM or DROP their money on the countertop even when I was holding out my hand to accept it. For some reason it struck me as very rude...
There are, of course, many more, but that's another gripe. Haha.
[By the way, loved you on Professor Blastoff! I really hope you come on the show again.
Posted by: Bonnie at June 8, 2012 6:31 PM
Aww, thank you! So sorry about your grandma.
And I think it's really important to consider that when you think something is not going well in a restaurant, that the service person may be having a really bad day or may be stuck with somebody else's tables and his or her own and no busboy. They could just be a jerk, but maybe they aren't.
Posted by: Amy Alkon 
at June 9, 2012 12:01 AM
