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Mystery Call


I got a nasty attempt at an anonymous phone call this afternoon from some genius who forgot to block his number. It was a man -- sounded between 25-55, I'd guess -- probably in his mid-forties. The guy said, "Amy?" "Yes," I responded. Then he said, "You are a vicious..." ("bitch," or something like that -- I've already forgotten). Anyway, my caller ID read:

Zane Greene, 310-573-4309

Thinking to check my Caller ID, I quickly got in a friendly "Zane!" before the guy hung up. I called the number, and it's a fax machine. Maybe I'll try later. Google comes up with some phone company business under this name, and the Reverse Directory says it's a Verizon number, in Santa Monica, CA, but may have moved due to number portability. I just tried to fax the person the following, but they stopped the fax:

310-573-4309, Zane Greene

If you have some problem with me, you might avoid the fourth-grade approach of playing hangup, and instead write me at

Now, this person seems to know me, but if they really did, wouldn't they know how irritating I get around a mystery?! Anybody out there heard of this Zane Greene? Anybody try the number -- now, or, perhaps...later! -- and have any luck getting anybody on the other end to pick up?

Posted by aalkon at January 4, 2005 1:48 PM


Lets everyone around the world call him at all hours!

Posted by: eric at January 5, 2005 12:19 AM

As Faye Dunaway as Joan Crawford said, "Don't fuck with me boys!" (I'm just trying to return the poor man's call!)

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 5, 2005 12:21 AM

I don't know any Zane Greene, but I do know a married couple who've seriously fucked up their son's life by naming him "Zane." I mean, really -- when did strange words like "zane" become acceptable names for human beings? No wonder he's angry. It's like that old Johnny Cash song, "A boy named Sue." Poor thing. Have mercy on him! He's damaged goods!

Posted by: Lena Cuisina! -- not just another dumbfounded whore anymore! at January 5, 2005 3:01 AM

If you do a google search on keywords "zane greene payphone" you come up with an interesting list of various court cases in California relating to payphone services. I wonder if this guy is now vested in cell phone use (or rather misuse) and is freaking out over your opinions on idiotic cell phone user behavior...

Posted by: Doug at January 5, 2005 4:43 AM

Doug, you're like a boy version of Amy Alkon, Bitch -- I mean, Girl -- Detective. Listen to you and your stealthy little google searches! The two of you should go into business together.

Posted by: Lena at January 5, 2005 5:44 AM

This might be a nice number to use whenever some registration on a website asks for your phone number. In fact, more and more stores are asking for phone numbers when you make purchases. That would be the gift that keeps on giving.


Posted by: Chris Wilson at January 5, 2005 8:21 AM

Hmmm, now there's no answer. I think I'll keep calling. Sooner or later, the person will probably need to pick up their phone or will answer by accident.

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 5, 2005 10:40 PM

If you haven't made the image deliberately blurry, all I can say is: Use the macro button on your camera to make that number crystal clear! If it's all part of your masterplan, ignore me.

Posted by: Jackie at January 6, 2005 5:36 PM

Thanks, Jackie. I actually did...and usually it works, but I was in a hurry and had problems making the number read through the little glass over the caller ID. PS I appreciate all technical help!

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 6, 2005 5:41 PM