And That's Snot All
Along with the hundreds of requests for love advice I get every week, I get a few requests for information on becoming an advice columnist:
Hi Amy my name is Kizzy, and I am interested in information on becoming a advice columnist, something like Ask Kizzy, what do I do to get started, is it a entrprneur thing or a small business thing and how do you go about getting paid for it, I need and information possible, thanks in advance.
My response:
You need wisdom first. Sorry, but other than that, I don't give advice on becoming an advice columnist. My priority is answering letters requesting love advice. Hope you understand.
Naturally, she doesn't:
first off you didnt have to be so rude, i know you dont want the fear of competition, and that was not my intent, i just wanted some basic advice, but looks like youre not good at that either...
Sigh. Bad idea:
Clearly, I was right that you lack the requisite wisdom, as your response to my polite reply that I devote myself to answering letters for love advice was to make a crack that I'm "not good" at what I do. You should read Krishnamurti's Freedom From The Known, so you learn a little more about what it means to behave with such hostility.Again, I repeat my suggestion that gaining wisdom should be tops on your list. Also, you might watch the unsupported allegations, such as my being afraid of competition, as this reflects irrationality and immaturity on your part. I don't want to help the competition -- why should I? -- but let's just say as a snotty, hostile, ungrateful teenager, you're not it.
PS The correct response to my response would have been "thanks anyway." And maybe even a "best wishes." Moreover, your letter was lazily written and lacks attention to proper spelling and grammar, which further reflects the lack of generosity of spirit, sense of entitlement, and lack of etiquette I see in both your emails.
Yes, like Kizzy, I'm also somewhat lacking in maturity, wisdom, and restraint, but, occasionally, I do like to revel in that.
Elmore Leonard is always asked:
"How Do I Get An Agent?
He says:
"Learn how to write and agent will find you."
Gregg Sutter at June 8, 2005 8:14 AM
I think you're missing a golden opportunity here: there must be a market for how-to books for aspiring advice columnists.
That way, when you get a letter like the one above, you can just say, "Thanks for the question! I wrote a whole book on the subject, and you can find it on Amazon."
Shivering Timbers at June 8, 2005 1:02 PM
Somewhat lacking in immaturity, wisdom, and restraint? What an under-statement. Don't forget to add that you're also hypocritical, preaching about self-esteem but yet you have this superiority complex which only shows deep insecurity. To better ways and feelings to you!
yawn at June 8, 2005 8:53 PM
Luckily, I'm not so insecure that I feel compelled to erase your comment or any other nasty remarks about me. You should check out the whole nasty little site about me -- which I just love:
http://sew-beautiful.us/concreep
I think I'll go write myself post-it notes about how wonderful I am and what big white teeth I have to stick on my mirror. Anything to pluck that flagging self-esteem out of the drain trap!
Amy Alkon at June 8, 2005 9:09 PM
PS Shiv, there's a book on How To Become An Advice Columnist or something like that. They quoted me. Personally, I can't think of a duller topic.
Amy Alkon at June 8, 2005 9:10 PM
Ah, yawn. Apparently not bored enough to step off the site without first making a comment. Goddess got your attention, did she not? Nuff said.
Goddyss at June 9, 2005 1:44 PM
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