Sisterhood? Sister-Hah!
Barbara Ellen writes in the Observer about the new "sisterhood" -- in which Rod Stewart's daughter Kimberly, says she likes Jennifer Aniston because she's "homely," and obviously must have something else besides looks going for her:
Of course there are those out there who would argue that 'sisterhood' per se is a myth. One man I know observed: 'Sisterhood only happens when a man walks into a room.' This, he believes, is when we all gang up against the common enemy - men - flouncing around calling each 'girlfriend!' and dispensing high fives like some long-lost episode of Sex and the City. However, when men aren't around, women hover around each other like vultures at the last carcass in town: competitive, sneaky, ready for the kill. What rubbish, you scoff - and rubbish it is. Most of the time. Then you notice how in magazine culture 'too-fat watch' has been joined by 'too-skinny watch': ostensibly a stab at social responsibility but really just another excuse to tear other women's bodies apart. You realise that women mainly buy these magazines. You notice yourself rifling through them unable to resist another shot of Tara Palmer-Toastrack. Then we get comments like Stewart's on Aniston. 'Homely'? 'Not exactly beautiful'? And finally you have to admit to yourself: men just don't do this.Let's face it, it's not all down to our gender simply 'enjoying a bit of gossip'. Men don't have entire magazines devoted to famous men looking awful. You wouldn't get Josh Hartnett sighing faux-sympathetically over Colin Farrell's beer gut. In fact, men rarely criticise each other on those terms.
Note to Barbara: That's because men are hard-wired to want beautiful women. We girls are hard-wired to want men who are "providers," and to care a bit about tallness and symmetry, but, to not be so laser-focused on men's looks as they are on ours. And now, after this tiny anthropological correction, back to Barbara's words on girls knocking girls:
Moreover, where women are concerned, a man will think it 's punishment enough that he doesn't find you attractive and leave it at that. By contrast, when women think other women are looking unattractive they will analyse the reasons endlessly, either with a forensic brutality or, worse,with the kind of cod-empathy ('But she is such a nice person') displayed by Stewart. A sentiment coming from the same place that once made it law that everyone had to compliment fat girls on their 'pretty faces'.It's like 'sisterhood' is alive and well, but in a bad way. In the New Sisterhood, the sisters are more like some real-life adolescent sisters - digging at each other, criticising and relishing each other's downfall. And you can't help wondering - why does this happen so often, why does it happen at all, when women are the more nurturing, supportive gender? Maybe it's simply the case that female empathy and celebrity cancel each other out (after all, we might snicker at Tara in a tank top but we wouldn't really enjoy seeing our own friends publicly humiliated). Ergo: what happens on the pages of Heat magazine might not be happening in our true feminist hearts. Whatever, all this certainly undermines the notion that Aniston somehow has 'women on her side 'over the Brad-Angelina business. With friends like this, who needs publicists?
Lord knows the media loves a catfight. It plays into the "women in competition for men" angle, and it sells magazines/gets ratings. Sadly, I don't think this is anything new. I've always known women who pick over other women's appearance with a fine toothed comb. When I was in high school, my mom used to go through my yearbook and critique every girl's appearance and provide a running scorecard of who was "fairest of them all." What I gleaned from this was that life was one big beauty contest in which I'd never measure up, and it took me years to overcome that and build up some self-confidence. I'd like to say that things have changed, but on a broad cultural basis, I think it's taken a turn for the worse.
deja pseu at August 22, 2005 8:40 AM
To my delight (back when she could be delightful), Rosie O'Donnell observed something of this sort in a monologue, which went approximately thus: "Why is it that when a really attractive woman enters a room, all the other women start hissing about her? You can be at a barful of pig-ugly men, and if Tome Selleck walks in, it's all thumbs-up, 'Heyyy, Magnummm!' They're on his side!"
Is complaining about the cards you were dealt a genetic trait? Sometimes it seems like it - although guys generally tell each other to "walk it off", to just deal with any situation.
Radwaste at August 22, 2005 2:12 PM
I concur with Rad, and challenge you to find three heterosexual men who think Jennifer Anniston is anything but hot. I think it is because men have a sense of humor and are more intelligent...
eric at August 22, 2005 4:31 PM
I kid! I kid! I just wanted someone to play with before I left the office...
eric at August 22, 2005 7:59 PM
I don't think Jennifer Aniston's especially hot, but I'd still hit it.
LYT at August 23, 2005 1:10 AM
Nice LYT, lol. But I'm a girl and even I agree. I read the article where Jennifer Anniston read what Rob S. kid said and she was pissed. Who could blame her? Being called 'homely' is like being called 'the girl with the great personality'. Even if it's true, you don't want to hear it, and in Jenn's case it's sooooooo far from the truth. I even saw some article that said Brad was 'trading in'- hello, these are women, not Mitsubishi's!
Lia at August 25, 2005 11:28 PM
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