Take The "Dress Like A Girl!" Challenge
Yet another woman popped by my table at my favorite So Cal breakfast café to lament how hard it is to meet a man. Well, yes it is, and it's especially hard for women who look like they're a little underdressed to be on call to repair people's septic tanks, as she's typically attired. (In case you're wondering, she doesn't read my blog.)
Today was not a special occasion for me; just an ordinary day, where I went off to my café for a little breakfast, newspaper reading, and a few hours of work on next week's column. Then again, not to be to queer about this, but I see every day as a special occasion, and I dress accordingly. This is how I dressed today to go to breakfast. I put the same outfit back on to go to dinner with Gregg, who took this photo in my kitchen after we came back.

Now, piece for piece, this outfit takes no more effort to throw on than a pair of sweatpants, a smelly old shirt and sweatshirt, and a pair of grimy sneakers.
In fact, it's kind of an easy uniform: black skirt, nice jacket, little pair of heels, matching earrings and hair torture device. I do have to admit, the red lipstick takes a bit of management. But then, you don't need socks with the shoes, so that's a step saved right there! (And yes, I know the shawl jammed in the purse looks messy, but I was in a hurry, and thought it might be cold in the restaurant.)
And in case you think it's expensive to look girly, cost of my outfit:
*skirt, discounted, from DNA in Venice, $35
*Carlos Falchi kitten heel pumps, Loehmann's clearance, $25
*black Ralph Lauren stretchy tank, Marshall's, $8
*jacket, Benetton, Third Street Promenade, half-off at summer clearance sale, $79
Here's a challenge to all of you women out there who wonder why men don't pay attention to you. You really don't have to look like Angelina Jolie. Just put a bit of effort into looking feminine. It's a really important quality men look for in women. If you dress just like the guys they throw one back with at the corner bar, maybe minus the 5 o'clock shadow...well, why should they give you a second look? You can have the most beautiful personality in the whole world, but nobody will ever know.
So, really, try it: Dress up like you're going someplace special, where you'd want to look really feminine. Then go walk the dog, go to the grocery store, pick up the your package at the post office...and report what happens in the comments section below.
NOTE: The unshy are welcome to submit "before" and "after" photos, or just "after" photos to post, or send links to photos.







Cute outfit! I can't wear shoes without hose, though. My feet either sweat or get blisters.
deja pseu at August 20, 2005 7:21 AM
Oh, and one other thing I've noticed among the more affluent women in West LA is that is seems to be de rigeuer that no matter what one is doing that one dresses like one is either coming from or going to a yoga class. That and the velour track suits. I'll be glad when those pass into fashion oblivion again.
deja pseu at August 20, 2005 10:01 AM
I always like how happy men are when you take a moment to look nice.
I discovered how easy it was to just be grand last Christmas-- I wore grand holiday outfits every day the last week before Christmas. Going shopping was fun.
Now I have the same "ease" Amy talks about except I wear Gothic Rock stuff from Hot Topic. As long as I hang everything up neatly, it's super easy to wear the next time.
Deirdre B. at August 20, 2005 4:02 PM
Pic at http://www.db-cooper.com/Extras/remoteAgain.jpg
Deirdre B. at August 20, 2005 4:05 PM
I don't know. At my age, post-menopause, boots and jeans are more comfortable. And dogs vs men? That one is a no brainer.
Sheryl at August 20, 2005 6:07 PM
Sheryl in Santa Fe? Hambone Sheryl? Where ya been?
eric at August 20, 2005 8:04 PM
So, the boys can't be in on this contest?
Charlie at August 21, 2005 12:40 AM
My life isn't as large without trannies. I miss them. Used to walk home through the West Village every day. Bring it on, boys! Boys who dress like girls do it so much better tan so many girls. I always wanted to live with a drag queen so I could really learn how to put on false eyelashes -- from a master. As it is, I have the makeup people put them on when I'm on TV. I don't normaly wear them, no, but if I did try to put them on, chances are, they'd end up false eyebrows.
Amy Alkon at August 21, 2005 7:21 AM
Very cute outfit (and model)! Your discussion reminds me of my Aunt in Palm Desert. She is a polio survivor and has suffered post-polio syndrome, many back problems over the years, and now is fighting breast cancer. She is one of the most elegant, attractive women I know in that she always looks nice. She wears pretty dresses even while her spine is bent and she relies on a walker. She is my inspiration for days when I'm just depressed or "feeling fat."
Imagine what she has to overcome both physically and emotionally, yet she presents herself to the world so beautifully.
By the way, while I love the look, I avoid pretty shoes like that except for special ocasions. I don't feel (actually never felt) very comfortable walking around in shoes tighter in the toe area (most fancy women shoes). I also don't seem to be suffering from some of the foot problems that other friends are. How do your feet handle walking around in those shoes everyday? In this manner, I envy men!
Claire at August 21, 2005 10:01 AM
Go for it Charlie! Can't wait to see the pictures.
Yes eric, that Sheryl. Hammie's biggest fan. I've been reading but haven't posted much. Missed you all.
Sheryl at August 21, 2005 12:17 PM
Aint it funny Sheryl? I never talk politics with people I actually know. Hope you're doing well.
eric at August 21, 2005 8:51 PM
A friend of mine was invited to a party. The dress code?
Athleisure.
Ack.
Of course, I can't pull off the cute yoga pant look, either. When I work out, I actually work out. With the sweating and the running and such.
I'm one of those chicks who has an easier time finding skirts to fit than I do jeans, but it never ceases to amaze me that people think I'm "dressing up."
slackmistress at August 22, 2005 3:00 PM
I agree, throwing on a cute top, doing something with your hair, and wielding a mascara brush will get you checked out if not hit on. Which is why, to avoid all that, I wear huge sweaters and bandannas on the long public transportation commute to my job. But keep in mind, I'm doing this to AVOID being picked up. So if you dress like this and expect a Brad/Denzel look-a-like to hit on you...lets just say, good luck with that.
A lot of women act like its not 'feminist' to try to look hot. That's just stupid. I'm not saying you need to throw on a booty hoe top and low riders, the goal isn't to feel uncomfortable, its to feel confident in your appearence. To feel pretty. And there is nothing wrong with that.
On a side note, Amy, that's a really cute jacket but $78?! Oi
Lia at August 25, 2005 11:40 PM
Life is 'ok' eric. And you? No, I seldom talk politics with people I know in real life.
Sheryl at August 28, 2005 7:08 PM
Love dressing up. Love it.
The problem is, it is not always such an easy thing to find clothing that fits and flatters you. I'm quite tall. Finding shoes that are large enough and shirts with sleeves that are long enough is neither an easy nor an inexpensive task. Yet the department store sales racks are full of pastel-colored polyester crap in sizes XS and S. I wonder why that is?
alissa at August 30, 2005 10:36 PM
Holland is filled with tall people. Also, if you go to Loehmann's and Daffy's and other stores with Euro clothes at a discount, you can find pants that are left long and meant to be tailored. And then some stuff you buy will just have to be taken in to fit. I bought a skirt in a 2 recently -- because they didn't have a 0. Now, I am 5'9", and thin, but no bonesack. Size inflation! Everywhere. Took it to the tailor. A good tailor is the answer. And shoes for drag queens if you have really huge feet. Luckily, I'm still within the realm of reason.
Amy Alkon at August 30, 2005 10:56 PM
Finding pants has become easier for me lately. I'm a fan of H&M, they've got nice longer dress pants for cheap. Shoes, too, are easier to find thanks to size inflation. Dresses, jackets, and tailored long sleeve tops are still a near-impossibility. Such is the problem with mass-marketed clothing, I suppose. Makes you want to go back to the days of more easily attainable custom clothing and dressmakers (very common before the 1950's actually).
alissa at August 31, 2005 9:15 AM
Not too many H&Ms in the USA. They have great prices!
Amy Alkon at August 31, 2005 10:28 AM
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