1-800-How's-My-Driving?
Well, 1-800-Pretty-Damn-Sucky. (They were practically licking my back bumper with their armored car, when I was in the far right lane on the freeway and there was no traffic in the lane next to me. Trucks, a cop told me, can drive in the two right lanes. And, I believe there were four, total, on this freeway.)
You know, boys, if you're going to menace a girl in a 1900 lb. hybrid hatchback, it's best that you first try to recall whether you have a phone number on the back of your vehicle for said girl to report what buttwads you are. Didn't think I'd follow your ass through downtown, now did you? I may be a friend to the environment, but I'm hell on wheels to creepazoids like you.
Speaking of which, I just tormented my car thief into finally starting to pay me restitution. I asked the City Attorney to give me his phone number when he didn't commence payment after his July court date. Nope, she couldn't do that. Okay, well, then there's Google! Found his name and cell phone number...called, it was him.
I left the little weasel a long message, suggesting that he start forking over immediately, lest I write a letter to the DA in January asking them to keep him in jail, running on a little hamster wheel until he pays me back for the damages and costs (such as the approximately $45 worth of tables and chairs I'd rented for a party that I had to pay hundreds of dollars for after they disappeared with my car).
And no, I'm not vengeful. I simply ask people to be accountable. And when they aren't accountable, I try to annoy the living crap out of them until they are.
UPDATE: Sometimes people confuse petty vengeance with accountability. This guy had every right to the money to fix his bumper, whether the highly-paid TV writers thought the "crease" was minor or not. And I find the auto-think that all lawyers are assholes is moronic. Does that mean all TV writers are not assholes? Clearly, these two are driving, blogging proof disproving any such thinking.
My email to the TV writer asshole:
You confuse accountability with petty vengeance (yours). You also have a dimwitted bias about lawyers. You also have no sense of the value of other people's time -- calling up professors from around the country to weigh in on this, absent values of your own. -Amy Alkon
Amy Alkon at October 14, 2005 8:57 AM
REGIS PHILBIN's DAUGHTER can't afford to pay for a bumper she messed up?
Arin at October 14, 2005 1:01 PM
Some people always want to get out free. Icky.
Amy Alkon at October 14, 2005 1:10 PM
Driving is not a right, it's a privilege. And 800 bucks is in line with what bodywork costs, in my experience. Did she not have insurance? I'm sorry I am not more eloquent. I am always surprised by people and their self centeredness.
John O at October 14, 2005 1:33 PM
Amy, is there ever a point at which you realize that pressing the issue adds, rather than relieves your stress?
Radwaste at October 14, 2005 3:59 PM
Rad--you're not a red-head, are you? I find that pressing the issue and making someone else stress out relieves my tension. And money in the bank makes my stress disappear immediately.
Regis's SIL must be a real piece of work. If I was his wife, I'd take a hard look at that behavior and pray it never gets directed towards me.
KateCoe at October 14, 2005 4:49 PM
No...especially when I'm getting money back. Making crime pay is how I think of it. Demanding accountability is actually extremely relaxing!
Amy Alkon at October 14, 2005 6:08 PM
Dude, she *chased down a car thief.* It's the story of the Pink Rambler that roped many of us in. If more Angelinos were so aggressive with troublemakers, LA would be paradise.
Crid at October 14, 2005 10:42 PM
Having been rear ended recently almost literally as I drove off the showroom floor with my first new car, I can attest that fixing a cosmetic dent in a bumper costs $800. My rear-ender (you can indeed construe that term to mean ass) pleaded that I not call his insurance but allow him to pay privately--then got pissy when I sent him the estimate. Suddenly he was the victim, and I his persecutor. It just goes to show that a victocrat can make anything someone else's fault. I'm sure Ms. Philbin thinks the O.C. isn't her fault, either.
Hillary at October 15, 2005 8:28 AM
Excuse me, but I'm looking at the armored car. I don't think negotiating downtown traffic, with the possibility of being called-in to the police as a robbery suspect for following an armored car, yields much more than calling the 800 number. So the guy was a butt in traffic? I am certain that one of these tailgaters, should you make it a habit of chasing them, will be violent with you. In such a case, your cell phone will be far too slow to defend you from a provoked nut!
Radwaste at October 15, 2005 4:12 PM
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