"Link Exchanges"
Kindly refrain from writing me to ask if I'll join you in the Internet version of "you show me yours and I'll show you mine," ye old link exchange. Here's my position on it, from an email to some chick with an advice site who wrote me:

Thanks for your nice words about my site. I don't do link exchanges, which I consider a form of Internet prostitution (while not meaning to cast aspersions on actual prostitution, an honest exchange of goods and services, the law notwithstanding). If people like my work, they should link to me. If they don't, they shouldn't. PS I even link to people who think I'm an idiot. Best,-Amy

For the record, I think most people out there giving relationship advice suck, and write terribly to boot -- aside from Dan Savage, Playboy's Chip Rowe (who may or may not be an actual human being), and Dear Prudence (aka Ann Landers' daughter Margo Howard). (Yes, there may be some brilliant advice columnists I have yet to discover, or have forgotten, especially since my mind compares unfavorably with a steel sieve much of the time.)

Dan Savage once said "analingus" a number of times -- slowly, methodically, and with great ennunciation -- while speaking on a panel to a bunch of daily newspaper features editors panting to get younger readers (but generally unwilling to do anything other than what they've been doing all along). While I'm a fan of his column and of the occasional op-ed pieces he writes for The New York Times, for this, I will love him forever.