Does My Ass Look Fat In This Marble?
Hillary Johnson, don't say I never did anything for you! (Or rather, for her new site, doesmyasslookfatinthesepants.com.) Marble statue from the sublimely renovated and newly opened Le Petit Palais, Paris.
More from Le Petit Palais:
This fresco is of a poet in the Jardin du Luxembourg, meeting his muses. We should all be so lucky, every day, on all counts: Being in Paris, being in Le Jardin, and getting a call from one's muses instead of having them out with a head cold or some other mundane excuse.
This lady with her petit singe (and yes, I love monkeys, at least in concept -- in person, they tend to toss feces and do other less than socially pleasing things) reminds me of another famous singe in Paris, Kiki Le Petit Singe, who is buried at the Cimetière des Animaux on the outskirts of Paris.
I loved this Courbet. Sadly, these days, if it were in an American museum, they'd probably cover it up with a sheet, like in when John Ashcroft put curtains in front of the boobie-baring statues in the Justice Department.
It gets better (or worse), depending on your mindset:
This woman's been having a "wardrobe malfunction" for centuries, and aren't we all thrilled for that?
I love the circus, and I was in love with the paintings of street circuses by Ferdinand Emmanuel Pelez de Cordova. Here's a panel from one of them that made me chant the line from the movie, Freaks, which is, approximately, "One of us! One of us! We accept him, one of us!":
And finally...
While I miss my petit chien (my two and a half pound Yorkshire terrier), who is home because I'm only here for a little over a week, I was rather charmed by this Grenouille aux oreilles de lapin, by Jean Carriès, who also did some wild-ass tiles that reminded me of the kiln-fired people stuck in jars I made in high school that my mother is still begging me to get out of my parents' garage.
The ass on the statue is not attractive, but the ass that is about the same size in the Courbet looks good to me!
Quentin Tarantino wrote a great line in Pulp Fiction about "what we find attractive to the sight and attractive to the touch are often entirely different", or something like that.
Great photos Amy... don't the museums over there care about you taking photos? Over here they act like you are stealing national secrets.
eric at February 11, 2006 8:28 AM
They were fine with people taking photos, providng you don't use the flash. It's nice, too. Because I want to look at those again for inspiration, and my memory is not my strongest feature.
Amy Alkon at February 11, 2006 8:36 AM
> providng you don't use the flash
Same at the Art Institute in Chicago. In LA, the blazers get angry if you even MENTION photography.
I would so do that marble girl.
Please tell me it's a girl.
Crid at February 11, 2006 9:22 AM
I would sooner impale myself on an emaciated Giacometti than go near that marbled blubber ass in the top photo.
I think Tarantino was describing how surprising it is to touch a big muscular ass. They always look like they're going to be much more resistant and hard. Still, they are hard to resist.
Lena at February 11, 2006 9:41 AM
Crid- I saw Deliverance last week, and the marble woman brings up bad memories of Ned Beatty.
eric at February 11, 2006 9:43 AM
Christ, you guys are harsh.
Femininity is an inherently rounded enterprise....
Crid at February 11, 2006 11:24 AM
Don't get me wrong: I like the tits on that scupture a lot.
Lena at February 12, 2006 12:29 PM
You forgot “L’origine du Monde” (“The Origin of the World”) that Super Frenchie (http://superfrenchie.com/) mentioned today which I doubt will ever be displayed in an American Museum.
Samara Morgan at February 12, 2006 8:10 PM
I didn't forget it at all. The problem is, it's not at Le Petit Palais; it's at Musée D'Orsay, and I've posted it before!
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2004/08/spano_in_pariss.html
(Unfortunately, that was before I learned how to use my camera without blurring all my photos)
We're very pussy-positive here at AdviceGoddess.com!
Amy Alkon at February 12, 2006 10:42 PM
This reminded me of something that happened to my late husband about eight years ago. At the time he worked at a VA hospital. His reserve unit was sent to Europe, and while there he took advantage of the museums. He sent postcards from the museums back to the office, about a half dozen of them.
When he got back, all but one had been put on the bulletin board. The sixth was of the Poseidon of Artemision, featuring a nude frontal view of the God. The boss told him it was too offensive to post and gave the postcard back to him. Interestingly, two of the other postcards featured nude female statues.
I wonder why so many Americans are afraid of penises?
Kimberly at February 13, 2006 4:04 PM
P.S. I love the monkey.
Kimberly at February 13, 2006 4:06 PM
Americans are often troubled by genitalia of any kind. Not me! Penis! Penis! Penis! I'm also very penis-positive! I am, however, very uncomfortable with photos or video of people having body parts of any kind shot or macheted off. I never understand why it's wrong to show a bit of titty on prime-time TV, but you can always show people being blown away.
Amy Alkon at February 13, 2006 8:22 PM
" ... the idea of beauty is a defensive swerve from the ugliness of sex and nature. Female genitals are literally grotesque. That is, they are of the grotto, earth fissures leading to the chthonian cavern of the womb." - Paglia, 1991
My oldest friend on Earth married a clever and perceptive woman who spent her early twenties becoming an MD, and missed learning the disco cynicism that the rest of picked up while partying. She asked him "Honey, do you suppose gay men think women's genitals are ugly?" He answered right back: "Darling, STRAIGHT men think women's genitals are ugly."
Adam Carolla, paraphrased: "All men are ugly at the level of the nutsack. Brad Pitt's got nothing on a salty old sea captain."
Crid at February 13, 2006 9:32 PM
"All men are ugly at the level of the nutsack. Brad Pitt's got nothing on a salty old sea captain."
THAT, my dear Crid, is 100% bullshit. I've licked a lot of nutsacks, and the variation in the pleasures they've afforded me has been enormous. The nutsacks of salty old sea captains are usually banging around their knees. Even through Brad Pitt is over 40 years old now, I'm sure his teabag is a lot tighter than that.
PS: By the way, some -- certainly not all -- men also have lovely anuses. Let me know if you want to hear more about that.
Lena likes 'em tight! at February 15, 2006 7:36 PM
deciso giovane masturbate @x@ deciso giovane orale fotti @x@ deciso giovane prostituta @x@ deciso giovane sesso @x@ deciso giovane spogliarello
Black Dragon at February 16, 2006 1:13 AM
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