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Is That A Bomb In Your Stool?
An online gamer accidentally loses his iPod in the toilet, at first, unbeknownst to him, and the stews call the Canadian version of the TSA and the nimwits there make the pilot land the plane -- even after the guy explained to the stews that the device was just his iPod. Amazing story. Here he is getting interrogated, but go to the link and read the whole dumbass thing:

They took me to a discreet corner. They brought out a tape recorder. I was told to put my hands up on the wall and spread my legs, and I was frisked from head to toe. They removed my wallet, disassembled it completely, and placed each of its contents in its own plastic evidence bag.

"Now Tim, for the sake of the tape recorder, I want you to state your full name and address." I did. "Now, each of us will state our name and position into the tape recorder." There were two detectives from the police department, a detective from Customs, and two members of the bomb squad.

Then started the questions. They were easy at first. They asked me where I lived. What do I do for a living? Why am I unemployed? How come it's taken me 4 months to find a job?

They asked me why I was visiting Canada. I was to visit a friend I met on World of Warcraft, Cara. They took down her name and what I could remember of her address. They asked me how we met.

"In an online game."
"What online game?"
"Umm ... World of Warcraft," I responded meekly.
"What kind of game is this?"
"It's a fantasy game ... it takes place online."
"Fantasy ... like it's got wizards and warlocks?"
"Well, it's got warlocks." (And they need to be nerfed.)

They asked me to describe my relation to Cara. I told them that people meet up in the game and go on adventures together, and that Cara and I were in a guild together that I was the leader of. They confused the concept of a guild with the game, however, and I had them believing that I was the Lord and Leader of all of WoW until I was able to correct them, and explain to them what a guild was.

So, when they put the pieces together; namely, that I was visiting a female person that I had met over a computer game, their next line of questioning went down an obvious path.

"So you and Cara are friends?"
"Yes."
"How long have you known her?"
"About 5 months I think? Maybe less."
"Do you have a romantic relationship with Cara?"
"No."
"Do you want a romantic relationship with Cara?"
"No."
"OK, so ... if you and Cara were drunk together, and she turned to you and said, 'Tim, let's go--'"

I interrupted him. "Excuse me ... what's the point of these questions?" The detective hardened. "Let me make things clear. I ask questions. You answer them. Do we have an understanding?"

"Yes." I paused. "I just don't see how this is relevant."

He spoke right in my face. "I've got 5 good men going into that airplane right now. Five of my best bomb squad guys. If there is any reason that I should be concerned for their life, then I need to know now. So just answer the questions, and do as I say."

via Consumerist

Posted by aalkon at August 30, 2006 10:59 AM

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Comments

Funny....sounds like something right out of the movie "Airplane".

Posted by: Rob at August 30, 2006 6:13 AM

Funny....sounds like something right out of the movie "Airplane"


Rob, I was thinking these guys should stop picking up interrogation dialogue tips from spy thrillers..


Because my surname and nationality are different from my husband's and kids' I am long accustomed to extra checking at UK immigration: the suspicion generally being that I've made up a cover story.

The "spy thriller" trick officials have used on me when they get me to "step to one side for some questions" is casually changing a detail about where I said I was educated when they regurgitate the verbal interview. I'm supposed to hastily agree with the "mistake" - I guess - instead of meekly correcting it.

I absolutely know not to giggle or roll my eyes. Or, god forbid, get sarcastic.

(It's sort of like the end of "The Great Escape" when the guy is cunningly fooled into answering in English at the German railway station. Well, sort of!).

Posted by: Jody Tresidder at August 30, 2006 8:20 AM

Well personally, I can totally understand how the remote possibility that this man might get drunk and have sex at some unkown time after being realsed from police custody would be vital information for the bom squad. They shoud have asked him when he planed on getting his next haircut as well.

Posted by: lujlp at August 30, 2006 3:31 PM

As a player of world of warcraft, thank you for linking that. That gave me a good laugh. I kind only wonder how awkward everything in that room must have been. He must've been concerned though; us online gaming freaks are obviously first candidates for bombing planes.

Posted by: Scott at August 30, 2006 11:08 PM

Jody,

i've always found UK customs to be quite a pleasant experience. Only had one screw up with the paperwork that was my fault. Almost found myself back on the plane.

Posted by: Rob at August 31, 2006 5:52 AM

Jody,i've always found UK customs to be quite a pleasant experience...

Rob,
Bottom line, same here really.

Some years ago I quietly accepted my different passport/different surname to my family can (just) provoke legitimately raised eyebrows with UK immigration - also because I appear to have permanent resident status in two countries while being a national of a third. Fair enough if they want to know why.

As long as I can muster Zen-like patience at the sillier "trick" questions or delays, it's fine.

Posted by: Jody Tresidder at August 31, 2006 1:02 PM

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