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Did You Pray To Your Demon God Today?
Pat Robertson should like us atheists because we don't pray to any god, demon or otherwise. Unless you're a Christian, however, Pat doesn't have such a high opinion of your particular dude in the sky. A viewer of his cash cow, The 700 Club, asked:

Why [do] evangelical Christians tell non-Christians that Jesus (God) is the only way to Heaven? Those who are Hindu, Buddhist, Islamic, etc. already know and have a relationship with God. Why is this? It seems disrespectful.

Robertson explained that the other guys' gods are "demonic powers":

No. They don’t have a relationship. There is the god of the Bible, who is Jehovah. When you see L-O-R-D in caps, that is the name. It’s not Allah, it’s not Brahma, it’s not Shiva, it’s not Vishnu, it’s not Buddha. It is Jehovah God. They don’t have a relationship with him. He is the God of all Gods. These others are mostly demonic powers. Sure they’re demons. There are many demons in the world.

In other words: "My god's cooler than your god. Nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah-nyah!"

Posted by aalkon at November 25, 2006 10:15 AM

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Actually, the name "Jehovah" is an error from the middle ages. God's "name" is "Yahweh." I was actually reading Robertson's remarks, and I thought you were quoting one of Jehovah's Witnesses. That stuff is straight out of their literature.

But perhaps the subtleties of the Christian faith should be a less pressing concern than, say, calling for the assassination of a foreign head of state, then denying he ever said it. Or less pressing than concurring with a colleague who just blamed the terrorist attacks on 9/11 on gays, the ACLU, pro-abortionists, feminists and others, then maintaining that you didn't actually hear what you just rubber-stamped. It must have been by the grace of God that you actually managed to add comments that were actually in context of what you couldn't hear.

Apparently, face-saving lies aren't prohibited in the buy-bull, as in did, "Did you buy that bull Robertson just spouted today?"

Posted by: Patrick at November 25, 2006 4:44 AM

That's hilarious. And I believe you're right, as god is spelled, in Hebrew:

Yud Hey Vuv Hey

(Mom's a part-time biblical scholar, and I do remember a few things from back in the day.)

PS I was once brought to a dinner party at SuperJew Barbra Streisand's, who is a nasty person, and was quite rude to me, as I was the only non-movie star there...and managed to show her up with the above knowledge, which I shouted from the end of the dinner table (social Siberia, where she'd banished me, away from my friend, which we both found hilarious).

"I don't remember how to spell god in Hebrew," she said to the group.

Me, piping up from the other end: "I believe it's 'yud hey vuv hey'!"

Her from the other end: Look of death.

What a bitch.

Posted by: Amy Alkon at November 25, 2006 6:03 AM

Well, that's Babs for you. "How dare you speak after I went to all that trouble to shun you! Do you not understand what it is to be shunned by me?"

Posted by: Patrick at November 25, 2006 6:19 AM

We thought it was hilarious.

Posted by: Amy Alkon at November 25, 2006 6:24 AM

Well, these Ptolemaic belief systems wouldn't exist if they didn't know how to defend themselves: Discredit analysis, demonize competition, designate seating.

Posted by: Paul Hrissikopoulos at November 25, 2006 8:38 AM

You, I first heard Woman in Love when I was in fifth grade and it scared the Hell out of me. I think it permanently damaged my ability to form romantic attachments.

Posted by: Paul Hrissikopoulos at November 25, 2006 8:44 AM

I suppose it would just confuse Pat if someone pointed out that Buddhists don't think Buddha is God?

Posted by: Charlie (Colorado) at November 25, 2006 12:15 PM

That's right, Charlie. Do not confuse Pat with the facts.

Posted by: Kitt at November 26, 2006 3:26 PM

Since no one knows the original pronunciation of YHWH, the name of God, all modern pronunciations are incorrect by some degree. However, the English form "Jehovah" is the most widely used and recognized name of the Judeo-Christian God of the Bible-- the Creator of the OT, and the Father of Jesus Christ. In fact, "Jehovah" is far and away the choice of scholars who use it as the basis for translating the name of God consistently into other languages than any other modern pronunciation.

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