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How To Chase People Away From Your Gallery


Birmingham, Michigan, Robert Kidd Gallery. Gregg and I are here for a wedding. (We certainly aren't here for the weather.)



The best parts of the wedding were before the wedding, when we hung out with Elmore and Christine at their place...


...and hanging out with Elmore's kids who are Michigan-real like Gregg and me, and a lot of fun, at the wedding.

Here's my outfit. I had some lowcut thingamashirtie to wear, but it's arctic here, so I wore my librarian turtleneck with my little Ralph Kemp shrug. (Ralph Kemp's my favorite young Parisian designer -- and everything he designs, even pants that look like leather, and fancy sequinned jackets, can be thrown in the washing machine.)


I generally loathe weddings. This particular wedding was quite strange. These people did go all out. The wedding was at The Roostertail, on the Detroit River. But, they didn't allow dancing until midnight. (Elmore's daughters and I, and Ann and Ken Calvert, danced in our seats to rebel.) And you had to wait in line to forage your food from guys serving at buffet tables, which I call "hunter-gatherer dining." I prefer "waiters in dinner jackets deliver your filet mignon dining."

And here we are under mortar attack:


Posted by aalkon at January 21, 2007 3:54 PM


You certainly are a silly girl.

Posted by: Anonymous at January 21, 2007 7:52 AM

I don't know when that weather picture was taken, but we had a lovely winter day on the east side Saturday -- lines down the street at the car wash, sun pouring in through the south-facing windows, the whole bit.

It was great seeing you Friday, and thanks for picking up the check, which wasn't necessary. Call sometime when it's not so cold, and we'll go sailing.

Posted by: Nance at January 21, 2007 7:53 AM

Life is too short not to be a silly girl.

And Nance, that photo was taken Thursday when we were driving to my grandma's. And thanks for the offer, but you won't like me when I'm sailing. (I get seasick at the sight of a dock.)

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 21, 2007 8:04 AM

Ooh, I'll have to check out Robert Kemp's designs when we go to Paris. Machine washable good! Dry cleaner bad! (Well, not bad, but expensive and inconvenient.)

I also prefer sit-down-and-be-served meals to buffets, but at weddings have only experienced one sit-down meal where the lettuce wasn't wilted from being drenched in mayonaise-y dressing and the main entree cold and rubbery by the time it was served. (The exception was my BIL's very small wedding held at Café Del Rey.) I've been to a couple of weddings that were more reminiscent of the Queen opening a session of Parliament than a personal celebration, but for the most part my friends are of the school of thought that weddings should be fun and comfortable, with lots of booze and food and dancing.

Posted by: deja pseu at January 21, 2007 8:33 AM

rue de Seine, 6th arrondisement, next to Champion grocery store, and down the block from Bar du Marché. Tell Yael, Ralph's sister, who's usually minding the store, that I sent you.

The best wedding I've been to is my friend David Wallis'. He had it outdoors, in the backyard of their house in the Poconos, with a tent, spare ribs, corn on the cob, and a New Orleans band.

The best wedding I didn't go to was my old assistant Lydia's. She and her husband Sam spent about $300, if I remember correctly, including her Betsy Johnson dress, his tux, and a case of Prosecco. They got married on the beach in Santa Monica, and a friend threw a potluck dinner at her beach house. And Lydia and Sam have probably been married about five or six years, and they seem very, very happy!

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 21, 2007 8:41 AM

P.S. "anonymous" above is the annoying troll, "rainnn" or "rain."

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 21, 2007 9:02 AM

Buffets are typically a lot more financially sensible when it comes to wedding receptions, because fewer servers have to be hired. I approve of sane cost control at weddings, which isn't usually much in evidence.

Posted by: Jackie Danicki at January 21, 2007 9:07 AM

Well, the problem with the buffets at this one was the long lines. Same with getting drinks. And even then, the thing apparently cost $100K. And nobody even passed out canapés!

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 21, 2007 9:17 AM

What the hell is that awful sculpture? Some kind of diabolical cookie jar?
Fuckin' yecch!!

Too many people use their wedding as an excuse to produce a play with themselves as the stars.

Posted by: Deirdre B. at January 21, 2007 9:25 AM

In re: trolls--

IP address identifiers are teh aw3s0m3.

Posted by: deirdre B. at January 21, 2007 9:27 AM

apparently cost $100K

Crikey, that's just insane.

Thanks for the directions to Robert Kemp. On my "must do" list for sure!

Posted by: deja pseu at January 21, 2007 9:33 AM

Buffets are a really bad idea for people who have no sense of portion control (ie, they're a bad idea for 98% of the U.S. population).

Posted by: Lena at January 21, 2007 9:39 AM

"Elmore"? "Michigan"?
That photo looks familiar...
Or is is just an uncanny resemblance?

Posted by: TE at January 21, 2007 12:15 PM

Yes, it's The Hot Kid, himself.

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 21, 2007 12:52 PM

Lena, if people at a wedding have portion control as their primary worry, it's probably a very dull celebration indeed. (I'm not having a buffet at mine, but not because I think it's my job to play health practitioner for my friends and family.)

Posted by: Jackie Danicki at January 21, 2007 1:27 PM

How to chase people out of your gallery -- my husband and I are gleefully laughing over that one.
You're evil but gorgeous -- what a dress! What hair! Like a Toulouse Lautrec poster but of course the Hollywoodized version.

Posted by: Nan at January 21, 2007 4:25 PM

Aww, thanks...quite a compliment!

Posted by: Amy Alkon at January 21, 2007 10:45 PM

I imagine the families of the bride and groom will be happy to read such a gracious review of their wedding.

Posted by: Maureen Francis at January 24, 2007 3:36 AM

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