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Divine Comedy
From The Atheist's Bible, which Lena gave me:

"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way. So I stole one and asked Him to forgive me." -Emo Phillips

"It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning." -Bill Watterson

"I do not believe in God. I believe in cashmere." -Fran Lebowitz

"The difference between religion and cults is determined by how much real estate is owned." -Frank Zappa.

"If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses." -Lenny Bruce

Posted by aalkon at November 7, 2007 11:13 AM

Comments

Isn't The Atheist's Bible fun? It's sitting right here beside my computer as I write.

My favorite aphorism from it:

"If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?
George Daacon

Posted by: Axman at November 7, 2007 7:26 AM

"If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses." -Lenny Bruce

Seriously, if jebus were ever to "return" do think he'd ever want to see another cross again?

In some of the cathedrals I've toured I've seen life-sized depictions of jebus nailed to a cross, writhing in sad agony, that could only be described as horrific.

Just imagine if "The holy mother Mary" was taken on a tour of a church and encountered one of these tributes to man's inhumanity:

Mary: "Gee....all this for ME? What a nice place you have he..*GASP* OH MY GOD!!! MY SON!! I NEVER THOUGHT I'D HAVE TO SEE THAT AGAIN!!! *Insert Lamentations*

Posted by: RedPretzel in LA at November 7, 2007 9:50 AM

> nailed to a cross, writhing
> in sad agony, that could only
> be described as horrific.

Read Paglia, she's all over that. Americans don't like guts, it's the same reason we don't have sides of beef dripping in the butcher's window.

Posted by: Crid at November 7, 2007 11:36 AM

Remember, there is a big difference between bending over and knelling down. Tax the churches.
Another Zappa quote.
Don’t confuse glorifying religious organizations with believing in God.
A quote by me, just now.

Posted by: rusty wilson at November 7, 2007 11:41 AM

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