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Huckanut Thinks An Egg Is A Person
Electra Draper writes for The Denver Post:

Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee on Monday endorsed a proposed Colorado Human Life Amendment that would define personhood as a fertilized egg.

The former Arkansas governor and Baptist minister also supports a human-life amendment to the U.S. Constitution.

Huckabee spoke favorably about the Colorado ballot initiative, sponsored by 20-year-old Kristi Burton and her Colorado for Equal Rights group, during his Friday visit to Colorado Springs.
On Monday, Huckabee lent official support to the measure.

"This proposed constitutional amendment will define a person as a human being from the moment life begins at conception," Huckabee said in a statement.

"With this amendment, Colorado has an opportunity to send a clear message that every human life has value," Huckabee said. "Passing this amendment will mean the people of Colorado will protect the sanctity of life from conception until natural death occurs."

Burton's initiative, if approved by voters in November, would extend state constitutional protections to every fertilized egg, guaranteeing the right to life, liberty, equality of justice and due process of law.

Approval would lay the foundation for making abortion illegal in the state.

Posted by aalkon at February 26, 2008 5:26 AM


"Approval would lay the foundation for making abortion illegal in the state."

Actually, it lays the groundwork for government intrusion in shocking, unintended ways. These mouth-breathing idiots are making it possible for you to be arrested for miscarrying.

I'm beginning to think the amount of intelligence in the world is a constant, and as the number of people rises, the allotment per person goes down. This is what you get when you give other people the power to meddle in your affairs, because you can't be bothered.

Posted by: Radwaste at February 26, 2008 2:08 AM

Of course the next logical step is to rule that unfertilised eggs and semen are proto-humans and have full right under the law too.
All women will have to be constantly pregnant from puberty onwards or be found guilty of removing a proto-persons right to life.
And woe betide the man who is caught spilling his seed upon the soil!

Posted by: Simon Proctor Author Profile Page at February 26, 2008 3:02 AM

think about the law of unintended consequences? Radwaste, you jest! Bleagh, don't bet on this one passing, I am surely going to vote against it. There is a difference between private philosophy and public policy, and it drives me up a frelling wall that crusaders of all camps just. don't. get. it. I don't know if we will ever be able to tackle the very special case of life within life, but I also don't ever see that anyone has tried. I think that at least is Roe's strength in ambiguity... skirting the 'when is life started, and what is it" argument seems the best when nobody agrees on exactly what it is...

I'm sure focus on the family will jump on the bandwagon, and the republic of boulder will oppose, and it'll come down to a dash of common sense, and not be voted in...

Posted by: SwissArmyD at February 26, 2008 3:11 AM

"And woe betide the man who is caught spilling his seed upon the soil!" SimonP

woah... flashback to Python's Meaning of Life.
Father: [singing] Every sperm is sacred/Every sperm is great/If a sperm is wasted/God gets quite irate.

Posted by: SwissArmyD at February 26, 2008 3:17 AM

Well of course. Us Brits having the superior humour (makes up for the weather... and dentisty... and so on and so forth).

Of course once the reproductive cells have been declared proto-people the defenders of rights (that is what they are right? Not just nut jobs but concerned defenders of human rights) will realise that any human cell can be used to create a clone (maybe not now but one day) and will declare all cells proto-people.

Biting your fingernails will be punishable by death.

Posted by: Simon Proctor Author Profile Page at February 26, 2008 3:56 AM

I don't think your fingernails have cells. Aren't they like hair, just extruded protein? No need for alarm, then.

Posted by: Norman at February 26, 2008 4:10 AM

So, Simon, you're saying (in your first post above) that the step beyond nanny government is Onany government?

Posted by: BlogDog Author Profile Page at February 26, 2008 5:06 AM

The thing is, as I wrote in a piece for Pajamas Media, there's no definitive answer on when life begins. Personally, I don't believe a person is a person until they're out out of the mother and breathing on their own. Your opinion may vary. But based on the fact that you believe, without evidence, that there's a big man in the sky moving you around like a chess piece, who actually gives a shit about you and your life (I mean, how second grade), and based on your belief that the extraordinarily silly and contradictory book of fairy tales called The BIble is handed down from said big man in the sky...don't fucking legislate what I can and cannot do with stuff inside my body.

Posted by: Amy Alkon Author Profile Page at February 26, 2008 5:37 AM

Hyperbolic "unintended consequences" run through my mind...

Doctor preparing for In Vitro: "Bad news, we successfully fertilized 5 eggs. As they all have human rights, we cannot freeze any of them without their written consent. So we'll have to either implant all of them, or we'll have to put some up for adoption."

Posted by: Jamie Author Profile Page at February 26, 2008 7:16 AM

So, is Mike Huckabee going to carry all of these unwanted fertilized eggs - excuse me, I mean incubating "souls" - to term? Or perhaps adopt them when they physically emerge? Or maybe donate a large percentage of his salary to setting up an orphanage?

Oh, no, of course not. It's only "Christian" to make sure they come into this world. Once something might infringe upon your individual life as an irritant or problem, suddenly this fantasy called religion goes out the window. What a self-righteous, short-sighted asshole.

Posted by: Jessica at February 26, 2008 8:00 AM

Oo I'll tell my friend who just had a miscarriage and an ectopic pregnancy. She'll be so excited to serve 2 prison sentences for failure to be an adequate baby maker on top of her already deep depression.

Thanks Hucktard.

Posted by: Shinobi at February 26, 2008 8:02 AM

A fertilized egg IS a person. Which is why we must lobby and establish laws against those individuals that seek to imprison fertilized eggs in a dank, dark, hot, confined chamber for 9 months (or MORE!)


Posted by: jerry at February 26, 2008 8:11 AM

So, is Mike Huckabee going to carry all of these unwanted fertilized eggs - excuse me, I mean incubating "souls" - to term? Or perhaps adopt them when they physically emerge? Or maybe donate a large percentage of his salary to setting up an orphanage?

My solution for people who are anti-abortion was something along those lines: Pay pregnant women to have babies, then pay to raise the kids, including sending them to college.

You aren't free to meddle with what's inside my body, but there's a free market in fetusland waiting to be opened!

Posted by: Amy Alkon Author Profile Page at February 26, 2008 8:22 AM

Appears to be religious or political types that want this amendment. Any examples otherwise? Both having the strong desire for as many humans as possible to get that almighty tithe or more taxpayers.

This human life amendment has been ongoing in many forms since Roe v. Wade. I can only see the greed behind their intentions. It seems that the person attached to the fetus will have her right to life aborted. Women are the gateway into this world. She determines the outcome. If we were not such a controlling, misogynistic society still, a woman would actually be making the decision instead of "high and mighty" hypocrites. The love of women has more precedence above our beliefs about when life starts.

Posted by: kbling at February 26, 2008 8:30 AM

:::earworm alert:::

Habitual offenders
scumbag lawyers with agendas
Now, people I don't know which one is worse.
Natural disasters
Wolf-in-sheep's-clothing pastors
Godammit I'm afraid to send my kids to church

Posted by: Flynne at February 26, 2008 9:00 AM

For the record, I am NOT a fan of the artist whose song I quoted above, but I do believe this particular song has a message that needs some attention paid to it. YMMV

Posted by: Flynne at February 26, 2008 9:02 AM

Ironically, having courts parse the "human-ness" of an "at-risk" or sadly departed bit of protoplasm will lead to the furious application of tools provided by that Great Satan, molecular biology, which the Hucksters would otherwise gladly abolish. In their righteous zeal to define, with infinite granularity, exactly what humans are, they will be forced to acknowledge their kinship to apes.

Posted by: DaveG at February 26, 2008 9:23 AM


Google yields no clues. Who is the artist?

Posted by: DaveG at February 26, 2008 9:25 AM

DaveG, it's Kid Rock, off his latest (released in Oct '07) album Rock and Roll Jesus (ick). The song is called 'Amen' and it actually does rock. Well, it's got a good beat and you can dance to it, but the words are what got me. Give it a listen if you get a chance.

Posted by: Flynne at February 26, 2008 10:03 AM

Posted by: Flynne at February 26, 2008 10:06 AM

i hope the they don't drop one of those slippery little bastards out of their petree dish ... it would be murder!

Posted by: dena at February 26, 2008 10:06 AM

Good Tune!

Posted by: DaveG at February 26, 2008 10:25 AM

Does that mean a miscarriage is involuntary manslaughter?

Posted by: CK at February 26, 2008 10:43 AM

Does that mean a miscarriage is involuntary manslaughter?

It could be interpreted that way.

Posted by: Flynne at February 26, 2008 11:32 AM


I was going to bring up ectopic pregnancy. Ectopic pregnancy is a fertilized egg outside of the uterus, usually in the fallopian tubes. It is almost always never viable, while being medically harmful to the woman. Under the proposed statute, would saving a woman's life from an ectopic pregnancy be considered murder? What about women who have a tubal miscarriage? The anti-abortion people always seem to put the fetus, or in this case, the fertilized egg, over the life of the living, breathing woman who is the carrier for it.

Also, speaking of Mike Huckabee, I thought he was really funny on SNL this week.

Posted by: Amy K. at February 26, 2008 12:20 PM

Hyperbolic "unintended consequences" run through my mind...
Statutory rapist: "Well, yeah she did say she wasn't quite 18, your honor, but the constitution says life begins at conception so I figure that extra 9 months puts me in the clear."

Posted by: SeanH at February 26, 2008 1:53 PM

What version of the Bible does this guy read?

When I was a teen (and was told that I had to go to church), I asked my pastor what the Bible said about when life began. This was a couple of days after an anti-abortion group showed up outside my high school with huge pictures of aborted fetuses telling us all that we would "burn for all eternity" if we had an abortion. My pastor sat down with me and a King James Bible and found a number of passages that state that life does not begin until the first breath (Gen. 2:7, Job 33:4, Ecc. 11:5). He also showed me one that states that if a man causes a miscarriage, he must pay a fine to the husband; but if a man causes a miscarriage and it kills the mother, he will be killed (Ex. 21:22-25). If a fetus is a person, and the "death" of a fetus is murder, why isn't the sentence death as for any other murder?

And honestly, who wants to go back to a time when any woman who had a miscarriage was punished? Does this mean that it could be illegal to drink caffeine when pregnant because it has been shown in some studies to increase the risk of miscarriage in some women?

Some days I just feel like I need to bang my head against the wall. On those days I have debates with fundamentalists.

Posted by: Kristen at February 26, 2008 4:51 PM

Welcome to the United States of Abstinence.
Step over here to receive your tracking chip implant, bible, and banjo.

Posted by: Gog_Magog_Carpet_Reclaimers at February 26, 2008 8:05 PM

If a fertilized egg is considered having rights I have just a few questions

1. Who will be held responsible for miscarages?
2. Will women be reqired to turn in their tampons to some government agency to check for the occasional fertilized egg which did not implant inthe unterine wall?
3. If fertilized eggs have a right to life liberty and equality under the law - wouldnt implanting them without first figuring out if they want to be born be a violation of their rights?

Posted by: lujlp at February 26, 2008 10:24 PM

Ooo... just when I thought I had exhausted my interest in this debate - new information!

In my Molecular Cell Biology class, we're learning about stem cells, and cloning, etc. My text "Biology Today", Minkoff & Baker, 2004 says that some people (always pc) hold the view that an embryo is not yet a human, at least for the first 2 weeks in utero, because it could split to become two, or, two embryos could fuse to become one.

If you (as an embryo) incorporated another embryo into yourself in utero, could you then be charged with murder and/or cannibalism once you're born?

Posted by: Christina at February 27, 2008 12:09 AM

PS God was bigtime into abortion. Posting an entry about that now for Wednesday.

Posted by: Amy Alkon Author Profile Page at February 27, 2008 12:33 AM

Well, in the case of the ex-cop who killed his pregnant lover, he's going away for a long time:

Posted by: Flynne at February 27, 2008 1:01 PM

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