Wow. This chick's got way bigger problems than a misdirected text. If she flips out over stuff like this I can't imagine what she's like when something really happens.

Like I say all the time: she needs to dump his ass... so he can meet someone who won't be so insecure, and controlling.

We don't know, based on this letter, she's controlling. I get that she loses her temper, not that she makes her boyfriend shower her with candy, flowers, cars, yachts and fur coats when she does.

I don't believe this relationship is unsalvagable. If he had written Amy about his girlfriend's explosive temper, perhaps it would be.

But she wrote him. She recognized that her responses to innocent mistakes are unreasonable and is asking for help.

I think if she works on this, as Amy advised, this can be overcome.

But seriously, the relationship must end over this? Is there no hope of correcting her behavior? Because if there isn't, then she's basically doomed (or should be) to spending the rest of her life alone.

Well, if you don't trust your partner, you have bigger fish to fry.

May I suggest counting to 10, 100, or 1,000 before delivering the nastygram?

I live this. Pretty sure she has an underlying anxiety issue. Could be genetic or as in my case done to her by someone/circumstance. It's what happens when you spend too much time on high alert (high stress environment). You get oversensitised to some or all stimuli and you brain/body over react. The worst part is that (unlike some cognitive problems) you know damn well your reaction was way out of proportion. The worst type of mental health issue is when you are a nut and you know it. Those a fixable but excruciating. You have to own the really stupid paranoid thoughts and be on guard (initially 24/7). When you wake up genuinely mad at him/her over your own dreams and stay mad at them all day (or for days) it sucks.

For instance some guy you don't know likes your GF, wife etc. facebook post (one she uses for WORK). Normal reaction: Ok probably friend or coworker. Anxiety laden reaction: OMG she has a boyfriend (and off you go investigating him/her). Logical Response: If she did she'd have told him to stay off her FB. Your brain will adjust their level of both stupidity and connivance to fit what ever idiot story it generated today.

LW: If you want to wallow in this misery by all means enjoy, and yeah leave him so he can find someone not wallowing in self pity. How ever if you want to fix this seek professional help. As you climb out of this you will on more than one occasion look in the mirror and be absolutely certain you need an I Love Me jacket. Heads up as this ride is really really gonna hurt.

Wow. BPD, anyone? Yikes!

"And despite knowing that he really loves me, I blow up like this a lot."

As LW points out, it's not him.

Hard to say if she'll grow out of it or get worse (SHE gave him a BUSINESS CARD so I'll have a revenge affair!) Ha Ha Ha (Maybe?)

After seeing what I've seen, I suggest thinking twice before giving her the keys to your place or signing on the dotted line.

There are some issues you just don't want to live with up close and personal.

On the flip side, I have a friend who is crazy. She knows she is crazy. But through all of that she really trusts her husband. So every so often she will flip out and he will tell her 'You are going nutty'. At which point she resets and they move on. Of course this is why she can't hold down a job. She is kind of like what Bob described. 'Didn't say hi back to me this morning. You must be out to get me. Obviously the only solution is to strike back now before it is too late.' And then you have a pile of industrial sabotage on your hands. All because you were busy and didn't hear someone in a noisy environment.

It is up to the boyfriend to decide if he wants to deal with whatever kind of crazy she is packing.

One thing I'll mention: There's a cultural notion that a lot of people these days seem to have bought into (or had drummed into their heads as children). It's the one that says that if you aren't highly emotional and you don't get instant emotional reactions to everything, your fundamental humanity is lacking in some fashion. It holds that people who are even-tempered and rational are either party poopers, uncool strict parents, or robots not to be trusted. I don't know if this is the LW, but it's something I encounter a lot.

I don't understand why she's upset at all. I know three Bobs. If I go to text one and start typing in the name, my phone offers me three matches, and it's super easy to pick the wrong one. I have received texts meant for other people with my first or last name.

I don't understand why she's upset at all.

Shes a level 42 drama queen with all the bonus abilities activated

I don't understand why she's upset at all. I know three Bobs. If I go to text one and start typing in the name, my phone offers me three matches, and it's super easy to pick the wrong one. I have received texts meant for other people with my first or last name.

Well if the message was "Comfort Suites next time?" I can understand her distress.