Wow, how many are there? A frakkin' boatload of 'em:

1) Party invites. RSVP, dammit, so I know how many to plan for!! If you don't, I'm assuming you're not coming. Don't show up at the door, because I may not let you in.

2) Party invites. Don't RSVP, say you're coming, and then don't show, dammit!! If you do this, I'm crossing you off my list for next year. Too bad for you.

3) If you come to my party, do NOT wear a sprig of mistle toe, anywhere, especially you guys who think it's funny to wear one on your belt buckle (yes, I had a friend who did this. ACK.). I'll have a piece hanging in the archway between the dining room and the living room. Use that one, please, and LEAVE it where it is. Also, do NOT use it as an excuse to grope my hot cousin. She'll slap you silly.

4) When you see me reaching for an item in the store, and it's the last one, DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH ME. ASK the salespeople if there are any more. If not, too bad, I SAW IT FIRST.

5) DO NOT CUT IN LINE IN FRONT OF ME. I will slap you silly.

Egads, there are so many more but those are the ones that came to me off the top of my head.

K, going to set up the grill now. Hot dogs, hamburgeres, venison steaks, some corn on the cob, a nice broccoli, tomato and cucumber salad (with home-grown garlic, basil, oregano and a nice raspberry vinagrette, yum!), and we're good to go for the Labor Day festivities. The wine's on ice, got some nice Sam Adams Octoberfest beer in the fridge, a little blackberry brandy in the freezer. Dinner's at 5. Love and a Happy Labor Day to all!

o.O

Party invites are a big one, Flynne. Nice.

What about when you are standing in line at the check stand and someone is just inches away. This is especially uncomfortable when you are punching your ATM pin into the machine. I notice this happens more during the holidays.

OR when parking gets filled up at the malls during the holidays, and you see that some asswipe thinks their car is so much better than everyone else’s so they take up TWO spots to park(I am assuming its because they don't want to get little dings in there doors).

Also, one I was just discussing with my grandmother this weekend. Nice restaurants (not the pizza parlor or family type ones) but really nice restaurants. People take young children there who start screaming and crying - and one of the parents doesn't get up and walk out of the restaurant to calm them down.

And I think we can all respect the fact that kids are gonna cry - and that can't be helped. But if you are at a nice restaurant you should either expect to get up and take your kid outside - or wait until they are older. That shouldn't become everyone else’s problem.

There may be people there who can't afford to go out, or got a babysitter for their own kids - and this is a once a year deal for them. Not okay to disrupt everyone else’s dinner- they are paying for the ambiance too. I see more of this around the holidays because people during that time seem to eat out more...but this is a year round deal too.

How about annoying or rude questions during holiday family gatherings?

Last year my bf's grandma asked him why he hasn't married me yet, and whether he loved me. In front of the whole table.

I am sure there is more, just can't remember now...

Oh. Or asking someone how much they paid for a gift (either you paid too much, or not enough).

Dammit, do not --I REPEAT NOT--say "Have a nice day." I would rather you rip my dick off, than hear somebody say "Have a nice day."

Hey, i-holier:

Have a nice day!

People who have overly high expectations of the perfect holiday gathering strike me as shallow and well, just stupid.

Regarding the perfect party, gathering, wedding, or whatever, why, why, why does everything have to be perfect? At the end of the day if everyone had a good time except the host, what was accomplished? Did the bride and groom leave the wedding together as a married couple? Then it was a success! All of the rest doesn't really matter.

On another gripe: I know the restaurant host/hostess don't mean anything harmful by it, but it is very sloppy to say to a couple who arrive to get a table, "Just two?" What, should we ask the couple behind us if we can join them? Aren't two people allowed to dine alone? The host doesn't ask, "Just eight?" Well, how many more of us are needed to constitute the correct number to be seated? Heaven forbid if you are dining alone!

And please, do you have to yammer on the phone in front of me if we are supposed to be visiting? How hard is to tell the caller that you are visiting with friends and will call them later? If your call lasts more than a couple of minutes, I'm ready to do something else. You know, sometimes it's ok to just turn the phone off for a while.

whew...

Maybe I should clarify- I'm not talking about holiday parties being perfect, there is a certain amount of planning required to pull them off. I'm talking about small family get- togethers of 10 or fewer people. It really doesn't have to look like the holiday version of a Cool Whip commercial. Last year, a standing invitation became an un-invitation on Christmas day (for dinner). The missus couldn't figure out how to cut the homemade pumpkin pie 8 ways instead of 6. A card table and a couple of folding chairs would have ruined the "look" of her holiday table. "Well, you know how she is..." we were told. So we ate canned soup at home, just the two of us. And to think we came back into town a day early to attend this dinner. It sucked.

What do you do if your husband does something rude at a family function? I don't feel like it's my place to apologize for him, on the one hand, or to "correct" him, on the other.

People who bump your backside with their shopping cart while you're using your debit card or getting your change back.

Strangers who start to tell you their life stories or medical horror stories in checkout lines. Or talk about them loudly in line with a friend. I am about to go home and cook the food I'm purchasing right now, I don't want to hear about your infection or your fibroids.

People who drive the wrong way in the parking lot or garage to snag a newly-opened spot as soon as they get in, in front of me, who's obeyed the rules and circled the lot twice waiting for a space to open.

'So, how much did you pay for that?'

Keeping the TV on while you're with guests. If I wanted to watch TV I'd have stayed home, and why did you invite me if YOU wanted to watch TV? Extra go-to-hell points if the TV is tuned to Lifetime, Dr. Phil or Oprah.

Kids! Gods know, I love 'em, but parents need to be aware of when it's time pay attention to them, to wit:

1) When you see your little one sitting in the middle of the floor wailing, it's TIME TO GO. I don't care how GOOD a time YOU'RE having, and whether or not there are others there who will "see to him/her" that's YOUR child, YOU are responsbile, take them home NOW. Do NOT let your child disturb/disrupt my guests/party. (My daughters ARE old enough to take care of your child, yes, but it's THEIR party too.) Please take your kid home. Or ask me, and I'll find a nice quiet room to put them to bed for a while. But PLEASE be aware of and take care of YOUR child/ren. The rest of us will truly appreciate you for it.

2) Do NOT let your underaged child have an alcoholic beverage WITHOUT your supervision. My girls have had a sip of wine here and there, they don't like it, they won't want it. DON'T offer them any behind my back, and don't give YOURS any behind my back either. I make a big pot of wassail but I put the rum on the side. Please see to it that it stays there unless and until YOU want some. I see your kid with it, I'm gonna smack them, and then YOU for allowing it. (Also, smoke 'em if ya got 'em OUTSIDE. And don't let me see your kids with a cigarette either.)

3) Please teach your children some MANNERS. If they don't like what I'm serving, tell me and I'll make them a PB&J or something, but allowing them to sit there and say "eeeewwww, gross" is pretty damn rude. And you know what else? WIPE THEIR LITTLE FACES once in a while, would you please? I can't stand to see little kids with food-smeared faces and hands. Keep 'em clean ferpetesakes.

4) Do NOT get my children a LIVE pet of any kind for a Xmas present. I will kill you. Seriously. It is up to ME when/if they get a pet, not YOU. You can make a suggestion; fine. Show up at my door with a kitten or a puppy, and you will be asked to leave. Firmly. With a boot to your backside.

People who get pissed when you wish them Merry Christmas in good faith. What, I'm supposed to ask your holiday flavor first? if I know you're jewish, I'll say Happy Hannakuh. Otherwise, take it with the good intentions it was meant for.

Time To Vent!!!

Since I don't frequent womens' restrooms this one is for the guys.

I work in public office building and I'M SICK AND TIRED of guys who can't hit the BIG TARGET called THE TOILET!

GUESS WHAT!!! Someone else besides YOU!!! Is going to use the toilet after YOU! Clean up after yourself!

I'm so sick of going into a restroom where apparently some moron thinks if I get the majority of the urine in the toilet, I can call it a success!

It's a big target. If you can't hit the target, have mommy or daddy retrain you.

There is not a public restroom attendant like they sometimes have in Europe, to go right behind you and clean up.

I don't want to hear about prostate/medical problems! If your cabable of getting yourself to the toilet, you're cabale of checking to make sure its clean when you leave!

I'm sorry that some of you assholes didn't learn this from your parents.

See those other people milling around the office? Those are other humans and guess what? They also have to use the big boy potty.

Please remember that the retail sales staff and servers are people too. Yes they are here to serve you but please treat them like human beings.

Do not talk on your cell phone during the transaction.

Please believe me when I say we are out of X-item, I'm not trying to trick you.

Everyone is in the mall and I'm trying to help them all. You aren't that special of a snowflake.

I really want to go home. Please don't come in three minutes before closing just to browse.

I'm not asking you make my life sunshine and roses, just don't be heinous.

And for the love of god, hang up your cell phone.

****
And on the family side

I have a Grandad who believes everything Fox news says and is in the sewage processing business. If you've got a way to keep him from spouting off about how Obama drinks kitten blood and the latest readings of the oxygen creating bacteria in raw sludge - well I am all ears.

People who lean over the food platters as they eat, and talk with their mouths full.

And last Christmas Eve, one of our guests informed the neighborhood we were having an open house, when in fact we had only invited 3 other couples. We ended up with close to 30 people, almost half under the age 14.

And along Flynne's line, don't change your baby in the middle of the living room where everyone is relaxing.

And monitor how much your kids are filling their plates with. A few teenage boys cleaned out the turkey last Christmas Eve before the adults were even served.

Learn to say THANK YOU. You went to a nice party. Say thank when you leave and even send a email or a phone call later saying thank you again. Heck if you are classy you can Emily Post their ass with a THANK YOU CARD/NOTE. Thank everybody and smile it will really make the world a better place.

Acknowledge good work. Show gratitude. Your waitress or salesclerk does well tell them! Do not treat them like an invisible person or hired help.

Learn to be quick when shopping. God when I was a popcorn slinger at a movie theater years ago it so amazing how incompetent people are ordering or buying something simple. How can some people take a 30 second process (at a good time) to a five minute ordeal. Know what you want and what you need to do before you order or ring up something. Be quick, be clear, and for fuck sakes do not change your mind at the counter. Credit Cards and point cards are neat and useful but they fuck up the flow of shopping. USE CASH if possible. IF you need something special - THINK BEFORE - not at the counter with you humming and hawing. Have what you need in your hand -cards, cash, stuff you want to buy, coupons.

Hell I can take half the time to order a big Mac meal at McDonalds in the middle of Korea with my mash up pidgin Korean then it takes fluent Koreans to order a bloody 50 cent (400 won) ice cream cone. Bloody credit cards, cards membership and points, digging thru purse, remembering you have a friends along, whoops friend is going to pay seperate, whoops again they forgot their wallet, god let it end.

Oh taking my own advice. Thank You I-Holier for opinions even thru I usually disagree and also HAVE NICE DAY!.

Had this one happen yesterday. I went grocery shopping and the store was crowded. A mother thought it was cute that her three young children were helping her shop. I didn't find it so cute when all three spread out across every aisle and blocked traffic both ways while the mother explained the differences between 2% and skim milk. I tried to go the other way, but between them and the cart blocking the entance to the aisle they cause a huge back up. Finally I went another way only to discover them in the bread aisle crushing the bread while they fought over which loaf to pick and who got to put it in the cart.
I am all for teaching kids to help and being patient with them in stores, but I never let my three kids interfere with others trying to get their shopping done especially on a crowded day. I asked the mother several times to please let me pass in a very nice way. The last time I had to ask I was not as sweet. I ignored her glare, but when she whispered to her children about some people being so rude, I had to turn around and explain to her that its rude to constantly be in people's way, knock things off shelves, crush bread, and allow your kids to push the cart into some poor old lady not just once, but several times. Something tells me though that she just didn't get what I was saying.

Can't add too much to what's already been said, but augmenting what David M. just said above: I don't want to hear cell phone conversations coming from bathroom stalls. If your phone rings while you're busy in there, don't answer it. And unless you're undergoing a medical emergency, don't initiate any calls while otherwise occupied. That's just gross. And don't ask me about the dude I saw brushing his teeth while standing at the urinal. That really happened.

Also, if it's morning rush hour, there's always one car doing 39 mph on the spur while everyone else is doing 60. I will be caught behind it, unable to pass. Try not to be the driver of that car, 'cause I'm getting tired of it.

@John Paulson: "Acknowledge good work. Show gratitude. Your waitress or salesclerk does well tell them! Do not treat them like an invisible person or hired help."

Even better, tell their bosses. As many complaints as managers get to hear, they'll be really happy to hear someone praising their people.

Aw, Ms. Alkon just stole my thunder. Nuts!

Speaking of Black Friday, how about the people who got trampled to death in that Wal-Mart last year? That's pretty much the ultimate example of the consequences of rudeness.

Also, when somebody's done something nice for you, it's nice to recognize it.
Posted by: Amy Alkon at September 8, 2009 8:36 AM
-------------------------
Doing something nice or saying something nice. Just started reading How Full Is Your Bucket- by Donald O. Clifton and Tom Rath.

The gist of the book is, by saying something nice to someone, it not only fills their bucket, but yours as well.

What is really nice, is when a person hears something nice about themselves, that another person said.

Another one during family discussions this weekend along the lines of thanking people when they do something nice.

A friend of my Aunt's was on a boat this summer on a popular lake up here. They noticed a small orange "thingy" floating on the lake about 100 yards away and (thank God) decided to go investigate. There was a (not sure the age, but old enough to crawl) baby floating in a life jacket.

They grabbed the baby, and went from boat to boat on the lake looking for the parents. This took some time. Finally, they approached one boat where everyone was hysterical. Turns out, this baby was left asleep (thankfully with a life jacket) on the boat near the edge and when he was believed to have woken up and crawled off the side of the boat when no one was looking.

After giving the baby back, obviously, emotions were pretty high at the time, however, no one bothered to get my Aunt's friend's information down - to send a thank you card, letter - squat.

According to my Aunt's story, her friend of course didn't expect anything in return for returning the child safely to his parents. But the fact that she didn't get so much as boo from these people for this monumental act of kindness- well, I found it rude.

Also, returning an item (purse, cell phone, day planner) to someone who left it somewhere and not so much as getting a Thank You (I always offer to give people a reward if this happens to me - it's always refused, but a nice gesture).

Young people on public transit who do give their seats up for seniors, the disabled or pregnant women. ESPECIALLY when they are sitting in the "Reserved for seniors, pregnant women, or persons with disabilities" section.

People who let doors slam in your face, or don't hold it open when you are only a foot behind them especially when you are carrying an armload of something.

Oh, and when I am walking with my grandmother (who uses a cane) in a parking lot, or while crossing the street and someone decides we are moving too slowly and peels out around us. That one get's me rip-shit quick. I mean, it's not like she is doing it on purpose!!! You can wait a few moments - THIS MIGHT BE YOU ONE DAY.

Should have read: "who do NOT give their seats up for seniors..."

I'd like to see people less eager to take things personally.

Letter to the world at large: If I skipped ahead of you in in line or accidentally bumped you with my cart, please don't assume I'm a thoughtless oaf. This store is insane and I probably didn't see you in my effort not to run over the child sprawled out in the middle of the aisle. Or maybe I was just distracted by all the stuff I had to do.

I swear, it was not an attack on your honor. If you simply point out my transgression instead of screaming at me about what an asshole I am, I will apologize. Promise.

Holiday rudeness? People who don't like the gift you gave them and let it slip by way of verbal diarrhea or unstoppable facial expression. Or worse, who deliberately inform you that they don't like the gift. I can understand small children doing this, but anyone over the age of ten that does this needs a swift kick in the ass.

Also, people who insult your food offerings for a holiday buffet because they don't like it or it's not their way their mother makes it. Piss off and go to your mother's, then. I like my green beans with bacon and my sweet potatoes with marshmallows on top. No, it's not low-fat, and no, holiday calories won't kill you.

@Juliana: "I like my green beans with bacon and my sweet potatoes with marshmallows on top."

Okay, I can live with that. But please, not the cold, vinegar-based three-bean salad. Anything but that!

ooooooooo, dat's NASTY!!!!

OK. This happened back in the 90's when my husband and I and out two young children were 800 miles from home visiting my husband's dad and his new second wife(not my husband's mother who probably could not find the vacuum cleaner) The wife is German, born in Germany, the daughter of a Nazi officer. This was a second marriage for both of them. My husband, his brother, his dad, and I were sitting around the dining room table late in the evening having a pleasant chat, and drinking a few beers, and the second wife gets out the vacuum cleaner, turns it on and starts vacuuming around the table and under our feet.

>> vacuum cleaner, turns it on and starts >> vacuuming around the table and under our feet.

WOW.

Or people who get up and start clearing off the table when you are still eating (I hate it went servers in restaurants do this too).

Jeez, is there a limit? There seems to be no end! Especially appetizer etiquette.

- People picking appetizers up sniffing them and putting them back onto the tray.

- People dipping eating and then dipping again.

- People sticking their faces to the tray to smell to see if they are vegetarian. "Does this have beef?" SNIFFFFFFF

- Picking food off of other people's plates without asking.

- Spitting food out you don't like (not in a napkin)

- Eating something like prawns or something on a toothpick and tossing the tails or toothpicks back onto the serving plate.

- Licking fingers and going back in for more...

- Trying to be sly about a burp - but then blowing it in someones face.

- talking with your mouth full

- dropping an appetizer or beverage and walk away from it whistling without even attempting to pick it up. (This is something particularly annoying when children drop drinks on the floor and the parent looks around for someone ELSE to pick it up - without even so much as a motion to do it themselves).

- Showing up sick to a mixer or holiday party, and announcing your sick and shaking peoples hands.

- Punchbowls or Eggnog - scooping out a cup, tasting it and then pouring it back in.

- Brushing your hair at the table.

- Kicking your shoes off under the table.

And yes, I've seen all of these things happen with adults, mostly at holiday/work parties.

ICK!!!!

Oh, and last Thanksgiving, we had some friends who brought over a bachelor friend who was alone for the holidays. He spent the entire dinner texting his new girlfriend, and when he did speak he would lament how much he missed her. They had known each other a few weeks, apparantly.

Of course he didn't bring wine or a thank you gift either.

(PS- This man is a high school principal.)

People dipping eating and then dipping again.

I know this doesn't make you feel any better, but I remember a MythBusters that explored whether double-dipping really introduced more bacteria into the food. The answer was that double-dipping didn't do much. The food had plenty of bacteria on it just because it was out on the table.

That said, people shouldn't double dip. Even if it's harmless, it grosses people out and it's a tad greedy.

Hey, Amy, perhaps you need to do some serious counseling work with one of your regular commentors.

Flynne repeated threatened violence against other people. Slap; slap; kick.

Flynne, grown up people do not threaten others with violence over trivia. I am saying Grow Up. In my experience, people who are constantly threatening violence in fact do a lot of slapping and kicking and hitting, usually against children or SO.

Do not bother to use shaming language against me. You are out of order to talk that way.

The good news, Amy, is you have another example of unacceptable behavior for your list. Sarcasm intended.

My in-laws have pulled this one on a regular basis for years: Informing us, without a discussion, what our holiday plans will entail, regardless of whether we had already made plans of our own. The highlight was a few years ago when we received a call on Dec. 23rd informing us that they'd be arriving the next day. Keep in mind this was not an RSVP--there was no discussion, no arrangements, not even a question to determine whether or not this was okay with us or whether we were already busy. Just an assumption that we'd be in town and prepared to host overnight guests at a moment's notice. They time this sort of thing so that anyone who objects is setting themselves up to be the asshole who ruins what could have been a nice family holiday, and who has turned them out in the cold on Christmas Day. This is normal behavior for my MIL, even during the rest of the year, and I can only see it getting worse once the grandchild is born...

"...so they take up TWO spots to park..."

Did this once at NTC Orlando when Nuclear Power School was there: an officer decided his 300Z was important enough for two spaces. Hmm. I have a pickup truck and a chain - there's the hook point under his car. Pulllllll into alignment with the left space. Wave the officer coming in late to the spot on the right. Continue on down the row to park my truck.

If you're the officer who did that, that's the magic that moved your car!

-----

I just got back from DragonCon, where about 40 thousand people, in street clothes or anything else you could see on TV, in the movies, in comics or cartoons, behaved rather nicely at damn near all times. Sorry I don't have a nasty story for you.

I do pass people on the inside of corners when they cannot seem to see the thousand-foot gap in traffic arrive.

...people shouldn't double dip. Even if it's harmless, it grosses people out and it's a tad greedy.

And it could get you thrown out of the funeral without the airfare-reducing death certificate.

Well, somebody doesn't recognize that speech sometimes simply isn't enough to communicate anything with urgency.

irlandes, what boundary do you recommend before a truly harmless, but attention-getting slap is in order?

Flynne has a .30-06 and knows how to use it, despite being a self-described hippie.

Anyone who's ever been in a schoolyard fight knows that order can be established or restored in the process. Do you want to call others, like the police, to do everything for you?

Okay, here's a few more holiday things:

-People who shop while on the phone, deadstop in the aisle and block whatever you need. You're trying to get past them, and they just look annoyed that you're in their vicinity. There's got to be a way to point out their rudeness without just being all "EXCUSE ME!" on 'em.

-Suggestion: If you're shopping with your iPod on, leave one earphone out. That way if anyone needs to speak to you, you are accessible and have a hope of hearing them. I do all my Christmas shopping with headphones to help calm me down when I'm waiting in the twenty minute checkout line, but I always keep one hanging to make sure that if someone needs to speak with me, they can. Common courtesy.

-Christmas shopping is hell. Expect it. Don't complain about the lines because you knew it was going to happen. Go in prepared to deal with the crowds and be prepared to not find what you're looking for. Don't be the whiny bitch who pitches a hissy fit in the store over "Why didn't you have enough blahblahblahs?". If you can't handle being in public at the busiest time of the year, do everyone a favor and use the Internet. But I, for one, don't need your attitude and I certainly don't wanna see you harranguing the poor salesclerks. Take a chill pill when you head out for holiday shopping.

-Here's one for my hubby. He frames pictures for a living at a craft store. His is the one of the few that will take new orders after Thanksgiving. But after a certain date, he can't take new orders, not even "quick pop-ins". Is there a way to explain that to particularly hard-headed folks without landing him in the boss's crosshairs for "bad customer service"?

-Finally, I, too, would like a way to gently rebuke people who state openly that they a)don't like, b) don't need or c)already have the present you got them. I find it terribly rude for someone to say "Man, I already have that!" at gift-giving time and I'd like a way to say "Couldn't you at least fake it, asshole" without resorting to snide remarks of my own.

Radwaste said: "I just got back from DragonCon, where about 40 thousand people, in street clothes or anything else you could see on TV, in the movies, in comics or cartoons, behaved rather nicely at damn near all times. Sorry I don't have a nasty story for you."

I am constantly amazed that people are so consistently polite at most of the massive geek conventions. The only people I ever have a problem with are the ones still in high school, who are just a liiiiiitttle too high on themselves to behave like humans. For all the costumes and props, bags and poster tubes people carry around, I'm hardly ever whacked with them, and people are really friendly and willing to help someone who's lost or (in my case) having a teeny attack of agoraphobia. I think geeks are just an awesome class of people.

Threadjack: Missed out on Dragoncon this year, very sad. It is the *best* Con for costumes, and this years list of celebs was wicked. Rad, don't you live in FL? Where do you stay when you go?

"A few teenage boys cleaned out the turkey last Christmas Eve before the adults were even served."

Oh, that's awful.

irlandes, I believe it was a figure of speech. I doubt Flynne actually goes around slapping and kicking strangers.

A bit of a hijack as I think mse needs to hear this-----

mse, yes...if you don't do something about it now, yes,yes,yes, it will get 100x worse when you have children. Not right at the holiday, but afterwards, a nice sit down talk is in order. Or get caller ID, don't pick up a couple days before a holiday? Or right there on the phone 'I'm sorry, we're going to be out of town, I wish I'd known sooner that you were planning to come'.You have no obligation to accept guests on short notice. I assume that this means canceling your own plans to entertain them?

We did not have 'the talk' and it did escalate, and we've had a hard 29-some years with MIL's intrusiveness. Showing up unannounced with 6-8 friends for tea, hovering on our street(!) to grab our son's report card before he got in the door(!), booking him for piano lessons we had no intention of starting,calling the school to tell them to check up on me, what I was feeding him etc (and I make everything from scratch), showing up and staying for five days while our he was traveling to Kyushu and Tokyo for university entrance exams and I was a wreck, so she could be here when the results came......at first I wanted her to like me, but the pent-up stress of canceling all my plans and being trapped taking her around shopping for days on end every time she showed up for 5-7 days out of the blue really built up over the years(and this type comes more often and stays longer once that first 3 day trip goes by without objection).

Let her get away with it now and you'll get 'But I've always just given you one day's notice' when you try to do something down the line. Save your own life, now.

hijack over, apologies to other posters.

If you want to see rude, look at all of the insults posted by fat people in response to MeMe Roth's television appearance where she cited scientific studies about the health effects of excess fat:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5gpSwiMWds

At least, more women are finally getting excited about science.

About those meddling mothers-in-law...

Years ago, the wife of a family friend was making a nuisance of herself by constantly showing up uninvited at the worst possible times, and never taking a hint, or no for an answer. One fall day when she appeared on our doorstep, my dad said "Hello Edith, we're going boating today. Welcome aboard!" It was very choppy on Lake Huron that day, so much so that she began turning green just a few minutes after we left the dock. And then she puked in her hat! This wasn't just any hat, mind you, but one of those great big wide lacy numbers covered with flowers & fruits. My parents somehow managed to keep their composure, but my sister & I could not contain ourselves. We laughed so hard you could have heard us on shore. After we all apologized for her distress, we headed back to the dock, then drove her home.

It worked! She never showed up at our door uninvited again.

No personal Christmas rudeness stories for you, Amy, but you might recall the Tickle-Me Elmo riots of 1996. Several store clerks & shoppers had to take an ambulance ride from the mall to the emergency room. It's a miracle there were no fatalities.

That's priceless, too bad we sold our boat!

"Rad, don't you live in FL? Where do you stay when you go?"

cornerdemon has been paying attention.
FL is where I'm from, but I live in SC now, having a job at Savannah River Site. I save about $300 over the Labor Day weekend by staying out by I-285 when Dragoncon is in town.

Rude people occasionally insist that what they "know" is right, Amy. I suppose you can't forget the Sadly, No! attitude attack.

And there are paparazzi...

How about another traffic one? The southbound spur is busy at rush hour, of course. I merge onto the freeway (people are generally very nice at this point), but then would like to work my way over to a left-hand exit to get on the express lane. Why is it, when you want to change lanes, see a gap you can safely merge into, and signal ahead of time what you're going to do, that somebody decides it's his moral imperative to close the gap and cut you off?

Raddy, crella, thank you, it was a figure of speech more or less, but in irlandes' case I can make an exception! o.O

That's another rudeness that I don't appreciate: casting aspersions on someone you don't even know. I'm about the mellowest hippie in the commune, but when something (or someone) gets my goat, I can get pretty damn vocal about it. Doesn't happen too often, mind you. I have even been known to tolerate strangers' children coming up to me and tugging on my exceptionally long hair, earrings, jacket fringe, whatever, and bearing it with a grin and gently removing the little hand from wherever it shouldn't be. I have much less tolerance for anyone older than the age of 5 who decides to pull that crap with me. Also, people with a holier-than-thou attitude really piss me off, and I will let them know that in no uncertain terms. Since I can't give irlandes the hairy eyeball over the Internet (which usually works wonders in meat space) I will just say that you, sir, can take your self-righteous, misguided opinion of me and stuff it. And I say this with a smile on my face. You'll just have to trust me on this one.

Is the book coming out in the UK? Are British media at all helpful? I'm sure you could get some great coverage over there. Brits are very hot on manners - don't, as they say, 'queue barge. Cutting in line will get you cut!

Not sure if this is helpful - just a thought that occurred to me.

Good luck with the final push!

Littering- My friend and I took our 2 girls aged 7 and 9 to Rocky Mountain National Park in Colorado over the Memorial Day weekend.

We got up and hiked on three different days and not until the 3rd day did we find litter in the park. They keep the park pristine and I was amazed and appreciative of being able to look saround and see nature with out any trash, garbage etc...

The third day we were hiking up boulders near a stream. We had hiked up probably 3/4 of a mile when we found two foil drink pouches you buy at the store. Some selfish assholes decided it was just two hard to fold them up and put them in their pocket. It was disappointing but a lesson in how selfish human beings can be. Of course we picked them up and disposed of properly when we got back. The girls asked why someone would leave trash there, so we got to explain how selfish people don't care about anything but themselves (I'm not sure they really understood).

Also- Our local neighborhood has a park with plenty of trash receptacles. However, inevitably, when my daughter and I go to the park, people have thrown their trash on the ground, sometimes within two feet of a trash receptacle that is not overflowing and has plenty of room in it. My daughter asks "Daddy, Why do people throw their trash on the ground?" I get to explain again how some people are lazy and or selfish and don't care about anybody but themselves. At age 7 she looks at me puzzled, helps me pick up the trash and then goes off to play.

People who don't control their dogs.
In the last 2-3 years I have been chased across the street once by a big dog while walking in my subdivision.
I was circled in my front yard by a good sized Chinese Shar Pei dog. Contrary to popular belief, they are just not cute but were bred to fight in China. I had to circle a tree in my front yard and race to my front door to get inside.
Also while walking down by the lake, 1/2 mile from my house, a guy was exercising his weimereiners one nipped at my sleeve and I didn't say anything. The next time I saw him I told him he better call his dog.
I now typically take my early morning walk with a pair of nunchuks. One of these days I probably will end up cracking a dog in the skull, because some owner lets their aggressive dog roam the neighborhood.

Ten years ago, my law school friends and I got up a reunion, in part so we could meet each other's children. There were probably 12 or 14 kids there that weekend. One of our extremely generous friends brought wonderful, well-thought-out gifts for every one of our children. However, as these things go, not every gift was exactly each child's heart's desire. All but 2 brothers were exceedingly grateful and polite, but the brothers had complete meltdowns, screaming that they "hated" their gift, they wanted to leave "right now" and go to the toy store to get "something good". This went on at length, with the dual tantrum taking over the whole event. Their parents seemed pretty embarrassed, but they didn't DO anything to stop it, and the gift giver was just devastated.

Fast forward 10 years. Same people, similar party. Our lovely friend, after much phone consultation and shopping, settles on the perfect gift for each family, a Wii. (Did I say he's extremely generous?) Again, the now-much-older children were just as thoughtful and appreciative as they could be, with the exception of the brothers, now 3 in number. They ripped open the package, looked at it, and tossed it on the floor. One said something like: "this is a piece of crap." Another whined: "I thought it was going to be something goooood!" Their parents, instead of smacking them like redheaded stepchildren (sorry Amy!), assured the gift-giver that it would come in handy at the lake house, and then scurried to tell the kids that they'd stop and get something fun on the way home!

It doesn't take much to train your children to be polite about the receipt of a gift. "Smile and say thank you, sweetie", and if you see a hint of rudeness, give them THE LOOK. Works every time. Someone above said he could understand kids younger than 10 being rude, but I don't agree. I'd say younger than 3 is understandable IF the parents whisk them away before they destroy everyone else's pleasure.

Oh, and I know there isn't much religion on this site, but I sure wish people wouldn't were Crocs or flip flops to Mass. I've pretty much resigned myself to everything else, even shiny strapless gowns with sparkly stuff. But swish, swish, flop, flop, up and down the aisle really bugs me.

WEAR crocs. Not "were crocs".

My ex-inlaws (amen) used to commandeer every holiday to the point that not spending the required 4-6 hours there was NOT an option.

They didn't like me (or anyone) for reasons that they never shared. We would arrive, sit on the sofa, no conversation or TV or music or anything and just stare at each other since they wouldn't talk to anyone. I would go into the kitchen quite a few times, to offer help (seeing that I was not allowed to bring a dish or anything, learned my lesson when I did anyway once). Once dinner was over, hours after we arrived, I would again offer to help cleanup, but she, being the martyr she was, would not allow it. Even attempts at putting things in the refrigerator after were met with a scowl, followed by taking the items out and rearranging them! I would then take my place back on the couch to sit for another hour while she signed and groaned while cleaning up.

The FIL would then retire to the basement to play video games while we all watched him do so.

Holidays were awful, but since I don't have to endure that anymore (good ol' divorce), I just give my kids a hug and say have a good time!

Too bad I didn't ask for advice on how to handle it back then!

If my father-in-law doesn't like his Christmas gift, he'll tell us so and just hand it back to us right then and there. "I don't want this. Here."

I know it's a late response, but thanks, Crella! We've actually been actively working to get a handle on it for almost a year now, and progress has been made (incrementally, but still). I've made it quite clear to my husband that if he doesn't want the responsibility of telling his mother no, then I will gladly do it--and I will. It's upsetting to think it has to come to bluntness or rudeness on my part to counteract her own rudeness, but the last thing I want is 30-odd years of what you described.

And Martin, that's priceless.

I have another few and this is with the SO's family. This has happened 3 times this summer alone, so its getting pretty old.

1. SO's uncle was marrying his longtime girlfriend on a Saturday, potluck, at their home up north. She didn't feel it was necessary to send us an invite since SO's mom would just let us know. Well, she did let us know, Saturday morning (of the wedding). Obviously, we had already had plans for the day with our 6 kids, but were able to stop by for a little bit.

2. SO's cousin is visiting from FL and family decides to have a potluck, plans 2 months before the trip. Again, on a Saturday. Yet again, SO's mom is in charge of letting everyone know. We get a call Friday at 5:00 asking if we want help driving the kids all over there. Our answer, to what? SO had bachelor party and so I made appearance with 6 kids and a borrowed 7 passenger car. Seriously?

3. SO's brother is having a 4th of July party, apparently planned for quite some time. We are invited to a party that my family is hosting, using the wonderful evite invitation system. I've told his family about this modern marvel by the way. We get a call on Saturday asking if we can bring a few cases of pop when we arrive. Again, to what? Oh - you are having a party? Well we'll just make that work!

Honestly. And he doesn't understand why I write everything on the calendar for him and remind him days ahead of time! With our blended family, we need to plan WELL ahead of time!

Hmmm. Holiday travel. DON'T get on a plane dressed like you have just rolled out of bed. Shower, get dressed... I don't want to sit next to morning funk.

Example of how to act:

Friend and I were enjoying sitting outside at a cafe when I noticed a wallet on a seat near our table. It had inside a business card, so connecting to the owner was easy. It was a typical woman's wallet with her life in it.

She picked it up from me that evening with profuse thanks. Two days later a thank-you card arrived in the post with a Starbucks giftcard.

I wasn't looking for anything, but thought what she did was good, classy manners. It was well thought-out. She didn't give me some cash on the spot, which would have been somewhat uncomfortable, but sent me a nice note. She included a well considered giftcard to a place just about anyone could find something to like.

Very nice indeed.

Packages. Packages everywhere. Surrounding restaurant tables and tripping up the wait staff. Stuffed in plane and train overhead bins and bumping against your feet because they don't quite fit underneath the seat. Taking up coveted space on public buses -- as if someone's gift is so precious it deserves its own seat. I don't care how brightly packaged or beautiful the ribbon, they're in the way. What happened to the holiday spirit being about kindness and consideration?

People digging through clothes (or whatever) looking for the right size and leaving a huge mess of the table, so that the next person has to take even more time trying to find what they want, or a clerk has to reorganize everything every ten minutes.

People who use the self check-out with a FULL cart of crap, and half the time have no idea how to use it, so they take forever, when the self check-outs are meant to be a time saver for people with a few items to get in and out in a hurry.

I'm not sure if this is an example of rudeness, so maybe someone can help me out. Isn't it rude to ask someone if they had returned, sold or otherwise discarded a gift that was given to them? This happened to me recently. My parents asked about a gift that they gave me for Christmas, which I sold immediately afterwards on ebay because I needed the money more than the item. They know that I sell on ebay a lot, so they actually asked me if I sold the gift. I looked them right in the face and lied, and I really resented that they put me in that spot. Were they rude to do this?

The rude behavior that irritates me the most has to do with people who change their child's dirty diaper in the car and put it under the car in the parking spot next to them for me to step in and run over once it's become good and ripe. I wish I could say this has only happened once, but it has happened multiple times.

I also detest people who change their child's diaper on a restaurant table.

As far as holiday rudeness, I HATE office gift exchanges. Last year there was a gift exchange here that had a MINIMUM spending limit of $40. I questioned the people who were running it, asking why they felt that it was appropriate to set a minimum amount, and they said that they wanted everyone to get a 'nice' gift to take home. $40 (minimum) is alot of money just so that you can participate in the holiday box lunch and gift exchange game. I didn't realize that the reason for the season was to rob me at gun point after I pulled my cash out of the ATM.

-Julie

Nothing irks me quite as much as people who think they are entitled to (fill in the blank--anything) and can't be bothered to say thank you. For example, a few weeks ago, I was leaving a certain fast food establishment and I held the door open for a worker (manager?) as I left. She strode through without so much as a polite murmur in my direction, let alone a "thank you". On occasions such as this, I say a little too enthusiastically, "You're welcome!" which I'm sure garners me a sneer of contempt aimed at my back as I walk away...(who the hell does SHE think SHE is?)
But, regardless, because I hate rudeness so much, I myself refuse to be rude. I will open doors, offer assistance when I see a need, give up my seat, wait my turn in line, say "excuse me" when I bump into someone, and send thank you cards when appropriate. I won't let 'em get to me!!

One Christmas, I had a guest arrive and proceed to "redecorate" my tree that I'd spent hours painstakingly decorating. She had a toddler, and rather than keep him away from the tree, she decided just to take all the bulbs off the bottom and redistribute them. I thought that was unbelievably rude.

Also, relatives who just go and ramble about in my kitchen, pulling out trays, dishes, and so forth, without asking. I know they mean well, trying to set up the holiday dinner, but you should always ask first.

mse on the in-laws from hell:
It's upsetting to think it has to come to bluntness or rudeness on my part to counteract her own rudeness
- - - - - - - - - -
You don't have to be rude.
You just have to be persistent - and repetitive.

Apologies to our resident Goddess - but Miss Manners gets this right:

1) come up with a simple, declarative statement that includes the appropriate standard emotional prefix/suffix (whether you mean it or not). Make this faultlessly conventional in wording and tone.

"I'm so sorry - but we've made other plans for the holiday. I wish you'd have called earlier."

2) avoid explaining, do not let yourself be dragged into interrogation. You do not need to justify, explain, or provide details.

(to the question "what could be more important that holidays with family?")

"Yes, that would be wonderful - but we've made other plans."

Notice - no details, no explaining.

3) repeat, repeat, repeat like a parrot with minor variations.

"I wish you'd called before, but we've made other plans. Would you like me to call a local hotel/restaurant that we know?"

(if your "other plans" involve eating out, suggest ANOTHER restaurant, obviously.)

Yes that's right - you must end this nonsense even if they show up on the doorstep, by continuing with your "other plans". It's best to have such a showdown before there are little ears around.

That's not rudeness - in fact, it's very important not to remain anodyne and polite in your statements. People like this are fishing for reaction - any reaction - and they feed off it.

It must be perfectly clear that you have no intention of changing your plans.

But since that is a perfectly reasonable position - there is no need for you to be rude.

I'll have to remember the location, Rad - Thanks.

Julie: Maybe in the office Suggestion Box, you could suggest that instead of doing a gift exchange, they could do a gift card exchange, with a set spending limit (ours is $15, but it sounds like that would be sneered at by your office, maybe $20 or $25). It's worked much nicer than the last couple of years, and it's better for when you get someone you don't know very well. Saves face for when you buy chocolate for someone allergic and etc.

Amy said: PS Your parents would've been nice to give you money if they had any idea you were in need, but a lot of people like to give gifts that suit them in some way more than the giver.

That's me! I'd much rather give a gift than money or a gift card. If you're in need, than I'll likely try to get you something you need (like handy kitchen stuff or a nice sweater). But for a holiday, I'd much rather give you something fun that you've been wanting for a while, and indulge you. Any other time during the year, I'll treat you to a grocery trip or pick up the tab on clothes. Sometimes I'll pay a bill for you. But at the holidays, I want to get you something fun and special.

And I HATE people that tell you "don't get me a gift, buy one for my girlfriend's kid instead" or "I'd really rather have money". I don't know your girlfriend or her kid, YOU are the one I'm friends with. And please don't tell me to give you money; that's just tacky. That's another one for you, Amy. How do you respond to "gift demands" while still remaining civil (and hopefully still remaining friends!)?

I have problems with people who bring their kid over and, as soon as he/she sees my cat, screams "kitty," and begins chasing the now-beleagured feline around the house, even into places where no guest should EVER poke their noses. Stay out from under my bed!

No matter the reason you chose not to get your kid a pet, teach him/her how to behave around animals. It might save a life.

I've watched kids come straight at a strange dog and the parents blame the dog when he snapped at what he perceived to be an attacker.

This was a real zinger.

I was driving out of a parking lot and someone in an oncoming car was getting quite worked up. Her face was all contorted and she she was gesticulating wildly at me to roll down the window.

This I did, when I drew up beside her. I wondered what on earth I'd done to evoke such a strong reaction.

She practically shot spittle at me as she rage filled her voice "You should use your indicator".

I started to apologize, saying she was right.

My friend in the passenger seat smiled at her and said in a calm and friendly voice "but it would be so much better with a smile".

Ding, Ding, Ding.

Often, it's all in the delivery.

Amy - thanks for your kind words, glad to help out. I'm always looking for good behavior to model. Mind you, my parakeet's bad behavior is so funny I can barely keep a straight face. I swear he taunts me.

Re: office gift exchange.

There's been a lot of chatter lately about how office birthdays/showers/etc have got out of hand and how people are expected to shell out continuously serious money for various people they barely know.

How does this keep a head of steam? People shouldn't be put under this pressure. They feel that if they don't contribute it will reflect badly on them at work and they end up spending money they can't afford. It's an utterly ridiculous situation.

Not bothering with deoderant before venturing onto a bus, an elevator, etc.

Wearing so much perfume that people who get near you can't breathe, but can TASTE your "fragrance."

Not minding that your dog barks ALL DAY LONG while he waits in the backyard for you to get home from work.

Tailgaters.

Tailgaters with their HIGHBEAMS on!

Talking in movie theatres.

Noisily eating / unwrapping in movie theatres.

Oh, God. Now you've got me started! I'd better quit before I get all pissed off!

Tailgaters is my pet peeve too, Jay R.

I just slow down so that I am doing EXACTLY the speed limit. Then I set the cruise control.

If you are in that much of a hurry, leave earlier.

One of the worst though, are people who flip thier cigarette butts out the window when driving. I have been know to get out of my car, walk up and grab it, and hand it back to them, saying, "you dropped something.". They are usually too shocked to do anything but take it back.

"Oh, and I know there isn't much religion on this site, but I sure wish people wouldn't wear Crocs or flip flops to Mass."

Heh. Ages ago I was in a small band, volunteering to play for a 4th of July presentation at the local ChristMart (you may have seen one - this was a Baptist gathering in a huge building).

In the front row was an amazing assortment of miniskirts and stilettoes...

I don't think that minister was after altar boys, no sirree!

As for the holiday gift exchange at the office:

We use what is referred to as a Chinese gift exchange. You pick numbers for your exchange and you pick generic gifts. You have a ckoice of taking someone else's gift, or random choice of remaining gifts. No problem with this in general. But at the the same time make sure that you have at leastthe minimum on the gift. Last XMas, we had some joker put a pair of those gift binoculars (they were the side gift from a "buy this on TV" type thing).

General pet peeve:

Self checkout aisles:

If you run into someone you know on a self-checkout aisle, either checkout and talk later or hold back and let usgo. Don't talk back and forth while slowing both of you down.

This isn't holidays, but I HATE assholes who see me with my kids and say something along the lines of "better you than me" (response being "you got that right" with a nice smile) or asking who the "evil" one is (about my twins). Yeah, you think you're witty, but you're really just an asshole. My kids are well behaved, I don't take them places inappropriate for kids, and if we ARE on our way out of somewhere due to a meltdown, i REALLY don't need to deal with a smart-ass!

And for the love of God do NOT make comments about the size of one's family! It's none of your damn business if I "know what causes that" (yes and DH and I LOVE it!) or planned them all!

Momof4, I love your response to, "Do you know what causes that?" lol I'd be tempted to add, "and I have pictures too, wanna see?"

It's terrible that anyone would ask, "who's the evil one?" regarding twins. That's not only rude, it's cruel.

I love to smoke Cigars. I am lucky where I am that I can smoke inside most bars and clubs. I love being able to relax, drink a whiskey, and smoke a good Cuban. Now me being Canadian, I am quitee polite so if some of the bars I am at serve food. If I see somebody eating - I learn to ask "if they mind my smoking". Heck if somebody is a little close I will ask if they mind. Most of the time they don't but I try to be considerate.

Now one thing that gets to me is rudeness at annoyances. I have been in a bar and some loud woman started complaining and swearing that the cigar was smelly and blah and blah and so on. Know this stupid woman never learned you can get more flies with honey then vinegar. All she would have had to do is ask me and I would have moved (maybe with a little bit of groaning). But she really got my ire with her rudeness and I so wanted to just blow smoke in her face. I have had similar experiences like that a few times.

So if you have a problem - somebody is being annoying, rude or purpose or not. Why not ask first nicely if they can stop or move or whatever. Do not roll your eyes, give the dirty look, yell or swear at the person that can be done LATER if the person does not take the polite asking.

As it is somethings go better if you say it with a smile.

"I know it's a late response, but thanks, Crella! We've actually been actively working to get a handle on it for almost a year now, and progress has been made (incrementally, but still)."

Good for you! Part of our problem is that her parents and then her husband let her just do whatever she wanted all her life. No one had ever said "No" to her. I'm glad you're making progress.

The suggestions for dealing with it were wonderful, just keep repeating them, and word it so it leaves no room for back-talk.

momof4, that's just awful! How dare people say those things!

For work I have to get on part of the interstate that converges to a connecting part of another interstate, before my exit, which is only 1/2 mile from where the interstates converge.

Due to work it is rush hour. I signal to get over and I can't tell you how many times peope have sped up so I can't get over.

What's the deal? Will this person get to work 5 milliseconds later if they let me in?

If I see someone signal that they are trying to get over, I back off and let them merge in. It helps traffic flow better and why risk an accident?

Non-Holiday rudeness:

Double parking at the school dropoff zone.

How can they be so oblivious and inconsiderate to the honking horns and traffic tie-ups? How difficult can it be to park your car in a normal parking spot and walk your offspring to the school entrance?

Blocking the entrance to the parking lot while dropping off children at school (see previous).

Not using turn signals at intersections. The incidence of 'broken' turn-signals seems to be proportional to the value of the automobile.

If I am at a red light, waiting to drive through, it would be nice to know that the car in front is waiting to turn and hasn't died at the wheel.

All good stuff - here's mine, many traffic-related:
- Pet peeve: If you're changing lanes & pulling in front of me on the highway, PLEASE SIGNAL - as the law in most states requires. I've had too many close calls, esp. idiots who've done this within a carlength or two as I was about to accelerate; they barely missed being rear-ended.
- Turn your lights on if it's raining (as many state laws ALSO require - esp. those where I drive); or foggy, or gray. Maybe you can see me; but I can't easily see your gray car in the fog and mist. DRL's (daytime running lights) do not count; w/o taillights I can - again! - come dangerously close to rear-ending you before I see you.
- Drive right, pass left. Guess what? Law in many states; good common sense. If we have 3+ lanes to share, feel free to go slow - but not in the passing lane.
- If s/o flashes their lights from behind, MOVE OVER - please? See prior comment.
- If there's a string of traffic passing you on the right, think about moving over! Here's a quarter, buy a clue.
- I like the cigarette butt story above ... a friend once got hit by a butt flicked into his car window, and fortuitously had a full ashtray in his car, which he dumped into the offender's convertible at the next stop. Nice? No. Effective? Yes. Justice? You decide.
- Let's leave the highway now. If we're visitng together, at home or teh local cafe, please put away the texting on the cell / emailing in the PDA. I am a Zen kinda guy - when you are with someone, be present with them - not on another conversation. teach your teens that this is rude (I hope my nieces read this!).
- When the flight crew tells you the plane is full, and asks that everybody put their computer bags under the seat to make room for others' roll-aboards, they mean you too! I always see at least one yutz on a flight who seems to think they're exempt ... including the guy on a recent flight who grudgingly let a young lady hand him his sportcoat from the overhead, but made no move to grab his slim laptop case to make room for her suitcase.
Thanks, Amy!

Ok, just one more.

People need to learn how to leave a voice message. If you are leaving a message for someone and it is a first call, leave the following:

Name
Relationship (Patient, client, IRS Agent)
Reason for call
Preferred contact method and information.

If you are returning someone's call give all of the information above, but ANSWER THEIR QUESTION!!! Few things drive me more nuts than playing phone tag with someone who refuses to answer a simple question in a voice mail message:

I say, "It's Julie, your sister. I'm calling to find out where you decided to have the anniversary party tomorrow. If I go into a dead zone, go ahead and leave the info on my voice-mail"

I get back "Julie, it's your sister, call me!"

AAAarrrrgggg!

-Julie

Take down your damn Christmas lights, it's February for Chrissakes.

Reading DVD titles on your cell phone in a DVD rental store so somebody can help you choose. Asking which of two titles might be acceptable but I have seen people reading row after row into their cell phone. Sheesh. Decide and if it isn't what you want, bring it back!!!

"- Turn your lights on if it's raining (as many state laws ALSO require - esp. those where I drive); or foggy, or gray. Maybe you can see me; but I can't easily see your gray car in the fog and mist. DRL's (daytime running lights) do not count; w/o taillights I can - again! - come dangerously close to rear-ending you before I see you. " Mr. Teflon at September 10, 2009 12:28 PM

I hate when people don't turn on the lights in a dizzle or fog. When I see this and I can, I'll pulled up to them and make the "Turn on your lights" gesture and some get it and some stare at me like I'm crazy. It comes down to a lack of consideration for the other people on the road.

And to add to Julie's comment about VoiceMail. My boyfriend expressed to me how much he dislikes checking VM. We worked it out that if I call and can't reach him but need to tell him something, I should hang up and send a text, which will pop right up on his screen without requiring him to call VM. It's easy for me and saves him lots of time and frustration.

He has tried to get his parents to do it too. No luck, he still will have to dial VM and check a message just to hear, "Hey, it's your Dad." All cell phones these days(at least to my knowledge)have caller ID. He can see that it's Dad without dialing and listening to VM.

I don't necessarily agree however I can understand where you are coming from with that. At least it was well thought out.