The Face Of Gay Marriage
Maybe fundamentalist heterosexuals are just jealous. Their marriages are falling apart, while a lot of really old gay guys have been happily, well, happily together, for decades. Hereís one example: Elmer Lokkins, 84, and Gustavo Archillo, 88, who have been a couple for six decades. After hiding their relationship with each other for 58 years, they were just married in Canada. Andrea Elliot tells their tale in todayís New York Times:
Mr. Archilla and Mr. Lokkins did not marry for political reasons, financial reasons or legal reasons. Through their 58 years together, they mostly stood by as others fought for rights like civil unions or domestic partnerships.Marriage meant more to them. It was something sacred, they said, an institution they cherished even as it shunned them.
The couple capture what some in the gay rights movement say is an essential but unappreciated point in the argument for same-sex marriage: it offers something more basic and profound than survivor rights or shared health care. For many gays and lesbians, the power of marriage lies in the sanctity of its tradition, its social legitimacy ó the very thing opponents of gay marriage are mobilizing at the highest levels to protect.
For Mr. Archilla and Mr. Lokkins, the need for an official blessing was so basic that until they married, they could not make their relationship public. It was only on the evening of Nov. 12, after they wed, that they embraced in front of others for the first time.
"What we did was finally cap it all up ó make it seem complete," said Mr. Archilla, the son of a Puerto Rican Presbyterian minister. "It was about fulfilling this desire people have to dignify what you have done all your life ó to qualify it by going through the ceremony so that it has the same seriousness, the same objective that anybody getting married would be entitled to."
Take another look at the photo of these two guys. How many heteros do you see who look that much in love after six decades together? You can probably count them on one finger. My suggestion: The middle one, pointed in the direction of The White House.
"Take another look at the photo of these two guys."
Ugh, why? They're kind of old.
"How many heteros do you see who look that much in love after six decades together?"
What do you see in their faces, besides lots of wrinkles? A nice Berkeley-esque bumper sticker that declares GAY LOVE = TRUE LOVE? Don't be such a hippy! Smart people marry for money, not love. And smart people make better conversation over dinner and drinks than do sappy married people (especially if they have tie-dyed babies in tow).
Cunt-a-Lena at December 17, 2003 11:29 PM
I think getting married is utterly dumb vis a vis the times we live in, how long people live, the facts that there are no goats that will go unfed if the marriage breaks up, etc. That said, if heterosexuals are allowed to be dumb, I think homosexuals should be allowed the same right.
Amy Alkon at December 18, 2003 8:53 AM
I'm impressed, actually. My uncle and his lover had been together for fifty-two years before Bill, my uncle's lover, passed on due to complications from Type II diabetes.
Patrick at December 20, 2003 8:07 PM