Can We Talk About Persistent Public Nose-Blowing?
Okay, if you have to sneak a little booger clearance and it’s impossible to leave your table for some reason (like, when you weren’t looking, somebody chained you to your chair), we’ll deal. Once.
As I'm writing this (to be published later), I’m sitting in a café at a table adjacent to that of a rather pretty girl with about three three-ton truckloads of snot up her nose, who thinks nothing of snorting it out, loudly and repeatedly, into a series of napkins -- while I’m eating lunch. (Or, rather, while I was eating lunch. The combo of her big honking snot blows and my egg salad platter just wasn't working for me.)
How does it not occur to…curs…like her, that it might be a tad…UNAPPEALING!…for others in earshot to be forced to participate in the details of their congestion?! Stay. The Fuck. Home. You disgusting walking secretion.
If only I could find out this girl’s name, and…hmmm, here’s a thought…I’ve always fantasized about calling the mother of some undermannered cretin I encounter in public and asking who’s responsible for the inconsiderate oaf-ette her daughter has become. One of these days...one of these days!
In case you're unaware, it's allergy season for millions of people in the US. Being an allergy sufferer myself, if I stayed home every time my nose was runny, I wouldn't leave the house for about 4 months per year. Now, there is a much more discreet way to blow your nose, so I see your point there. However, cut the girl some slack and consider yourself lucky that you aren't blessed wth the same health problems she's having to deal with. After all, you may not consider it polite to blow your nose in public, but it's not exactly a constitutional right not to be grossed out by snot in a public place.
Gigi at May 3, 2007 5:57 AM
We're not talking about Constitutional rights here. Incidentally, it seems part of the reason many people have allergies is the fact that our society is too clean. By that, I mean, we've gotten rid of (on purpose or by accident) the parasites we co-evolved with. I've blogged about this before -- Marlene Zuk is a behavioral ecologist whose session I covered at the last evolution society conference. She now has a book out -- been meaning to blog it -- it's called Riddled with Life: Friendly Worms, Ladybug Sex, and the Parasites That Make Us Who We Are. According to her book, kids who grow up with pets, run in the dirt, and have big brothers and sisters are less likely to have allergies. Also, it seems Jews make a big mistake in not eating pork -- apparently making themselves much more prone to come down with Crohn's disease, which researcher JV Weinstock has had luck sending into remission using a solution of pig whipworm in Gatorade.
Amy Alkon at May 3, 2007 6:12 AM
Stay. The Fuck. Home. You disgusting walking secretion.
My sentiments exactly! I am an allergy sufferer (ugh - Sacramento in the spring), and I have a simple remedy: take antihistamines and/or claritin or the like. 1) it makes the allergy sufferer a lot more comfortable and 2) minimizes the sharing of misery with those around you.
This chiquita could have easily gone to the restroom and hawked up all manner of loogies and blown out a pound of snot and not bothered anybody, yet instead she showed no consideration for those around her. In a polite society, this is normal - but then I suppose we are no longer in a polite society...
André-Tascha at May 3, 2007 7:05 AM
Exactly my point!
Amy Alkon at May 3, 2007 7:10 AM
I do wish we could all be civil enough to manage our snot in private. Maybe those rude individuals who honk their snout or eat their snot sickles in public should be told to blow it out their ass.
Roger at May 3, 2007 7:28 AM
Aha, Amy!
Finally, finally - I can declare the purpose of extruding brats.
When - just as you describe - some stranger in a public eaterie is Doing the Disgusting With Their Snot - you turn to one of your handy teenage sons, and you hiss at your teenager in a fake-whisper-of-outrage-that-effortlessly-carries to the stranger: did you just hoik something up your nose? That is revolting! Just think of all the people trying to eat here. Go to the bathroom, now!!
Then you slip your teenager (who has an excellent sense of humor) a five spot for being a good sport.
Jody Tresidder at May 3, 2007 8:13 AM
Maybe she wasn't from around these parts? In Germany, it seems more acceptable to blow your nose in public...maybe if she'd be on a cellphone, too, you'd have heard if she had a different accent!
I hate nose-blowing. My allergies have been bad because of the absurd pollen counts in the DC area, but I can't do it. I'm more of a dabber...
Brenda at May 3, 2007 8:16 AM
I lifeguarded in college. The college was about 10 minutes outside Cambridge and open to the public for a small fee. Every single Tuesday and Thursday night a group of Asian people (two men, two women) would come swim laps.
One woman had this habit of hawking up HUGE loogies (spelling?) and SPITTING them into the pool. Let me just say that, if she were to be in danger of drowning, I would have hesitated in my jumping into the pool for fear of ME drowning in the thick mucous slime now floating around her in the pool. I know there's chlorine and filters - but I was beyond disgusted - not to mention the fact that it was a huge space and her hawking sounds echoed around me as I attempted to do my accounting homework.
One night I nearly snapped and turned to the other lifeguard and said "Can I go say something to her about spitting her throat mucous into the pool?" and her response was "No, you can do that..." (!!!!) Ok, well since there's chlorine in the pool why don't I take a big dump in it?
I'm not sure if if perhaps there are different standards in different parts of the world concerning excreting your mucous into a public pool.
Gretchen at May 3, 2007 8:33 AM
I was in Tokyo recently and I was suffering with a sinus infection. Guess what? It is considered very rude to blow your nose anywhere outside of your home.
I'm in agreement on not blowing where people are eating.
miche at May 3, 2007 8:38 AM
I recommend using a neti pot to flush out your nasal passages at least once a day. Warm water a little non iodide or sea salt will do wonders. Yes, its disgusting, but you are doing it in the privacy of your own bathroom. It will reduce the frequency of head colds and allergy related symptoms. Except for people with serious sinus problems.
Joe at May 3, 2007 9:13 AM
I too have snot continually running down my face about 10 months of each year, even after taking a cocktail of allergy medicines. If I need to snort up something disgusting I make sure to excuse myself and do it somewhere private.
Darry at May 3, 2007 9:24 AM
Gretchen
I've seen someone take a dump in the pool. I dont swim cuz I'm too lazy to shave my legs, this is the one time my laziness has saved me from a horrible horrible experience.
PurplePen at May 3, 2007 9:51 AM
I'm sorry I should be more clear. I didnt actually SEE the person doing it. I just saw the evidence. Happened more than once too.
PurplePen at May 3, 2007 9:56 AM
I had a girlfriend from Japan some years ago who told me that when Charles and Diana visited Japan soon after their royal wedding, it was a big front page scandal that she blew her nose in public. That's a big no-no for a woman over there.
Now, here's the weird part. I was in college at the time and in my early twenties. My Japanese girlfriend, as we were sitting together in a bar, leaned over and tried to pop a zit for me. When I pulled back and protested her action, her response was, "Why? You don't need it!"
For the record, I'm with you on the nose blowing -- and I'm going to guess you're with me on the public zit popping.
Mario at May 3, 2007 9:57 AM
A floating Baby Ruth can cut the swim population drastically in minutes.
Roger at May 3, 2007 9:58 AM
Maybe she wasn't from around these parts?
She's American. Valley Girl, I think, from the annoying way she spoke, and I think she attends UCLA.
Public zit popping? Eek. And public nail clipping. DISGUSTING!
Amy Alkon at May 3, 2007 10:00 AM
Let the War on Lower Class Values continue or as seen through the eyes of the vulgarians, the Revolution of Lowered Expectations.
Joe at May 3, 2007 10:27 AM
I am now thoroughly grossed out...
André-Tascha at May 3, 2007 10:54 AM
It's a shame there isn't an equally rude educational response....
Someday, Amy will be the first person to perfect the fart as an editorial!
;)
RedPretzel in LA at May 3, 2007 11:25 AM
I once had to blow my nose at a table, snot emergency! I felt SO embarassed and tried to be discrete and ran to the bathroom to finish taking care of myself. I can't imagine doing it a lot, and with no cares. Plus, what you just leave your snot rags there for the server to pick up? Ick.
My old boss would cut his toe nails...in the office...while I was there for a meeting.
Stacy at May 3, 2007 11:45 AM
"A floating Baby Ruth can cut the swim population drastically in minutes."
... fade into the soundtrack from "Jaws"...
Lena at May 3, 2007 9:33 PM
this is too funny, I can imagine just how you feel Amy! But in response to what some people said about Japan...
I've been living here in Japan for a few too many cold and allergy seasons, and one thing I can tell you is - no one blows their nose here. It's a big no-no, not just for the ladies. (though you do get the occasional "freak" - usually someone who's clearly not too conscious of where he/she is anyway - who will do it)
The thing is...as disgusting as it may be to listen to someone blow several gallons of snot while you are trying to eat, imagine just for a second being in a restaurant, train (or another place where you can't readily run from people around you) and having to listen to the combined chorus of 20 or 30 people sucking up snot over and over and over...
I'm sorry to say, but I would SO rather have them blow their nose even just once, than to have to hear another slurping sound of years of sinus congestion assault my ears and stomach!!! bleh...getting sick just thinking about it...
oh, and for the German thing - yeah we (I'm German) are a little more free in that department, but it's certainly not good manners even there to go on honking away at the eating table!
well...just my two cents...
nina at May 3, 2007 11:36 PM
When I was a grad student, there was a girl in several of my classes who used to clear her throat during exams about every 15 seconds. I learned very quickly to bring ear plugs and to sit as far away from her as possible. Unfortunately, other students responded to exam stress with various gastrointestinal rumblings, and I couldn't find an inconspicuous nose plug anywhere.
Lena at May 4, 2007 8:47 AM
These are the best earplugs I've found.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0002CZYRA?ie=UTF8&tag=advicegoddess-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=9325&creativeASIN=B0002CZYRA
Got them after I read a review of earplugs on Slate.
Amy Alkon at May 4, 2007 9:14 AM
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