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Mr. Always Right
I'm very proud. I helped a girl get away from a violent, controlling-asshole boyfriend. She wrote me a week or two after the column was published (I'd e-mailed back and forth with her quite a bit) and she told me that she'd finally gotten out. She seems to have seen the light, too. Pretty thrilling. Here's her question:

On New Year’s Eve I met the only man I ever wanted to marry. We have the same likes and dislikes, his family loves me, mine loves him, and he wants to marry me. Still, he finds ways to make me feel I may not be the perfect girl for him (like a knock-down drag-out fight where he smashed my phone and iPod against the wall because I’d kissed his best friend before he and I met). Also, he doesn't want me being some big career-minded woman (what he initially claimed to love about me). I just got my dream job, which requires overtime and travel. He’s pushing me to go for something less demanding so I can be home to cook him dinner and care for the kids (which I do want…someday). He reminds me that his mother quit being a lawyer to help his father run his restaurant and so they could have “a beautiful life together and two adorable kids.” How much is too much to sacrifice for love?

--Conflicted

The beginning of my reply:

How much is too much to sacrifice for love?” Well, when you actually have love in your life, write back and I’ll let you know. In the meantime, just wondering, when your boyfriend turned your iPod into a $400 doorstop, was it playing your song?

The entire thing is here.

Posted by aalkon at August 15, 2007 8:35 AM

Comments

I hope she really did leave him. And I suspect that there are other people in controlling relationships that just might see the light thanks to your excellent column.

It's only a shame that people need help with the obvious answers. He smashes your ipod and cell phone, and you need someone to tell you to break up with him? How long would she have stayed with this jerk otherwise? Until she could no longer afford to keep replacing them?

Posted by: Patrick at August 15, 2007 5:31 PM

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