A New Low In Baby Naming
Sunday night, Lena and I walked by a woman whose baby was trying to stand up in its stroller contraption, and I heard her say to the kid, "Be careful, Gremlin."
Here are the top 20 weird celebrity baby names, some of which aren't such a big deal. (Somehow, Moon Unit and Dweezil don't bother me. They are Frank Zappa's kids after all, and I think it would be weirder if they were named Stephanie and Jason.)
I likewise don't find Satchel bad (Satchel Paige, anyone?...and he can be called "Satch"). But, sorry, if you're a 45-year-old executive, does Daisy Boo really work for you?
1. Moon Unit (Frank and Gail Zappa)
2. Fifi Trixibelle (Paula Yates and Bob Geldof)
3. Satchel (Mia Farrow and Woody Allen)
4. Apple (Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin)
5. Daisy Boo (Julia and Jamie Oliver)
6. Rumer (Demi Moore and Bruce Willis)
7. Peaches (Paula Yates and Bob Geldof)
8. River (Arlyn and John Phoenix)
9. Rocco (Madonna and Guy Ritchie)
10. Nell Marmalade (Helen Baxendale and David Eliot)
11. Maddox (adopted by Angelina Jolie)
12. Tiger Lily Heavenly Hirani (Paula Yates and Michael Hutchence)
13. Dweezil (Frank/Gail Zappa)
14. Brooklyn (Victoria/David Beckham)
15. Eugenie (Sarah Ferguson/Prince Andrew)
16. Zowie (Angie and David Bowie)
17. Rolan (Gloria Jones and Marc Bolan)
18. Phoenix Chi (Mel C and Jimmy Gulzar)
19. Coco (Courtney Cox and David Arquette)
20. Romeo (Victoria and David Beckham)
As for Tiger Lily Heavenly Hirani and Fifi Trixibelle, Yates should smoke a whole lot less pot. And maybe be brought up on child abuse charges.
"... Yates should smoke a whole lot less pot. And maybe be brought up on child abuse charges."
Paula Yates died a few years back.(Drugs plus alcohol).
Jody Tresidder at October 23, 2007 7:54 AM
A pity you need only working ovaries to have children.
Amy Alkon at October 23, 2007 7:56 AM
"Eugénie" is a name that has been around for very long time. See, e.g., Eugénie de Montijo (the wife of Napoleon III), the title character in Balzac's "Eugénie Grandet," the Russian actress Eugénie Leontovich, etc., etc. The average kid in an American daycare might not be named Eugénie, but the name does not belong in a list with "Moon Unit" and "Fifi Trixibelle."
Gail at October 23, 2007 8:10 AM
Maybe Gremlin was just a rather funny pet name...my dad called one of my sisters Beetle for a while when she was little.
Meg at October 23, 2007 8:42 AM
It could be a nickname:
I used to call my son "chunky monkey" during his infant/toddler transition or "monkey" for short. Needless to say, that isn't his name.
tarran at October 23, 2007 8:45 AM
21. The little Jillette girl
Crid at October 23, 2007 9:14 AM
22. Pilot Inspector Riesgraf-Lee, son of Beth Riesgraf and Jason Lee (of "My Name is Earl" fame).
Flynne at October 23, 2007 9:16 AM
I have less of a problem when weird celebrities name their children with odd names, as they are probably going to end up weird as well.
Amy Alkon at October 23, 2007 9:21 AM
23. Jett Travolta, son of John Travolta and Kelly Preston. He can hang with Pilot Inspector, what fun! o_O
Flynne at October 23, 2007 9:22 AM
I suspect Gremlin is a nickname. I still call my 7 year old Monkey on occasion.
I'm surprised the list doesn't have Kal-el Coppola Cage, son of Nicholas Cage.
Zowie Bowie started calling himself Joey as a teenager, he now goes by the name Duncan Jones. Source Wikipedia.
I think I have you beat on the most weird/appalling name. At the SF Zoo a few years ago, I heard a mom admonish her daughter, Beethoven. As in "Beethoven, I told you not to do that!" What person, in their right mind, names their child Beethoven?
Janet C at October 23, 2007 9:27 AM
I still affectionately call my boy Dayton "Dago". That raises a few eyebrows.
eric at October 23, 2007 9:54 AM
Didn't Grace Slick call her kid "god"?
Karen at October 23, 2007 10:48 AM
No, Grace named her daughter "Amerika".
Flynne at October 23, 2007 11:27 AM
I call my son "Pumpkin" sometimes, but that's not his name...
deja pseu at October 23, 2007 12:33 PM
What's so weird about "Rocco"? Obviously the compiler of this list isn't of Italian ancestry, and he/she probably doesn't even know anyone of Italian ancestry. Probably never visited Brooklyn, either.
LMM at October 23, 2007 1:00 PM
Dweezil was actually going to be the name of Franks band. After he decided on Mothers of invention, he used Dweezil for his first (and last) son. Thought you would want to know.
Rusty
rusty wilson at October 23, 2007 1:47 PM
Actually, Dweezil is Frank's older son. The younger son is Ahmet. Moon Unit is the oldest child, and the youngest sister is Diva Muffin. Don't ask me, I'm only the piano player. o_O
Flynne at October 23, 2007 4:33 PM
Frank said his eldest son was named for one of his wife's toes. A parakeet was called Bird Reynolds, and the poodle, Frunobulax, was known as "Fruny".
Rundgren had a mutt named Furburger. We imagine him calling out to the pooch in the park....
Crid at October 23, 2007 5:31 PM
I'm imagining what came to his call...
eric at October 23, 2007 5:43 PM
Paula Yates is actually already dead and will never be called to account for her naming crimes. She committed suicide/died of an overdose several years ago. Peaches is a partygoing It Girl feted as the British celebrity culture's "voice of youth," and occasionally writes a colum for some of the London papers, although I haven't noticed anything particularly significant in what she says.
Foose at October 23, 2007 7:09 PM
Here, now, my best showbiz gossip, from a person of whom I know little about a person of whom I know zero: Kathy Griffin said Peaches Geldof is a self-made millionaire.
Crid at October 23, 2007 8:46 PM
I suspect Gremlin is a nickname
She used it like it was his name, ordering him to do something.
What did Peaches millionaire in?
Amy Alkon at October 23, 2007 8:57 PM
Dunno... Wikipedia says she's only 18, so I'm probably remembering this wrong.
Millionaire makes a fabulous verb, though.
Crid at October 23, 2007 9:58 PM
Thank you. I enjoyed verbing it.
Amy Alkon at October 23, 2007 10:14 PM
I agree with Gail : my grand-daughter does not belong to this list.
Alain Q. at October 23, 2007 11:30 PM
Je suis d'accord.
Amy Alkon at October 23, 2007 11:43 PM
Given what I named my daughter, I can't cast any stones. No, I'm not telling. Not only is it too unique to post on the internet, it embarrasses me though fortunately not her. She actually likes it. True story though: new on the job after returning to my home state half a dozen years ago I'm coming back from ladies' room and I hear one of my coworkers mention my daughters' first and middle name. Now apart maybe... But together, well, there's probably only one in the world but definitely can't be two in a medium sized city so I stopped short and said what about xxxx xxxx? Turns out we were in the maternity ward together a couple of decades ago and her son (born the day before my daughter) bitches about his common as dirt name. The birth announcements were on the same page of the paper and whenever he gripes, she whips it out (yes, she saves those sentimental things) and says your name could be this. When I told her what it would have been had my daughter been a boy (even worse I fear), the groans all around were probably heard in the next office. What was I thinking when I was pregnant? I swear I was insane the whole time.
Donna at October 24, 2007 7:41 AM
Crid,
Frank said his eldest son was named for one of his wife's toes
Well I don’t know Crid. I read this on a new surround sound release of old Zappa recordings. The release was put out by Dweezil. He said he found the box of tapes and it had his name on it. That was how, after a little investigation, that he found out his dad had intended to name the Mothers Dweezil.
Flynne,
Thanks for the correction. I don’t know much about the family. All I know is what is written on the albums, and DVD surround sounds. O plan to see Zappa doing Zappa next month here in Houston.
rusty wilson at October 24, 2007 2:48 PM
No problem, Rusty. I have an old libretto from Thingfish, that I got from Barfko Swill. When I went to the website, there was a link to Frank's biography, so I had a look at it. That's were all the kids were listed, along with their year of birth.
Flynne at October 25, 2007 6:27 AM
...years. sheesh. o_O
Flynne at October 25, 2007 6:27 AM
Concerning Bruce Willis and Demi's Moore'children, I must say that my french ears are totally cringing at the sound of "Scout Larue"... In French, a scout is a teenage boy in uniform, with a severe addiction to camping in the mud and Baden Powell. And Larue in one word means nothing, but with just a little space, it means "the street ".
That being a girl's name ?
Ok, I give up...
PrincessH at October 25, 2007 9:24 AM
Reminds me of a hippy cabal, the children of whom I am friends with. We have, Rosemary, Sage, Thyme, Lavender and Angelicka Ruth (for root). The only boy produced by this cabal was beaten severely by other kids in school, until he learned to fight back, because of the name Basil. Parents on acid, should not name their own kids.
DuWayne at October 25, 2007 2:32 PM
Johnny Depp - what else could you say? True celebrity; great acting professional; and great, genuinely credible communication & presentation skills. And also congatulations for your recent role. Awaiting your upcoming movie.
Communication Skills at March 14, 2010 4:01 PM
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