How To Speak Hollyweasel
A screenwriter told a friend of mine, "I'm traveling today, so I'd like to call you tomorrow."
"Like to" being the operative words.
He'd like to, but he won't, and didn't.
My favorite, though, is the woman -- a TV specialist at a Hollywood management firm -- who asked this same friend of mine, a really decent guy in his 50s who earns a good living, whether he owns a car. (No, lady, he gets around Los Angeles on a Razor scooter
It's the tiniest people who behave this way.
Meanwhile, I was out with another friend the other night. He's a member of The Foundation Room at The House Of Blues. It's a private club with the profits benefiting inner-city kids that has to be seriously pricey to join. He took me there for dinner -- really cool place, very old New Orleans meets "The Adams Family" decor.
Afterward, there was some metal'y band playing live, so we went over to the Mondrian Hotel lobby to have drinks and keep talking. Finally, we were about to leave, and he went to the john. Two guys approached me -- 40-something Wall Streeters from Boston -- and asked whether I had a boyfriend. I told them yes, but he was home reading about Stalin (my stock reason for why Gregg isn't with me at parties that would make him miserable), and I was waiting for a friend.
The guys told me they were looking for a bar that wasn't packed with 20-something gay guys. My friend came out, I intro'd him to the two guys, and we speculated for a moment about a bar for them. Then he had a thought -- and told them he'd get them into The Foundation Room as his guests. And he did -- walked them over and told the door dude they were his guests, and got them in. And he even walked them to the elevator so they'd know how to get up to the main room.
Now there's a class act. And he only told the guys his name when one of them asked before we left them to go get our cars.
Another great post Amy. The background music I have on right now is Johnny Cash "The Wanderer", which seems so fitting.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3YFmpSFJ40
Eric at June 13, 2009 8:49 AM
Wow...I've never heard of The Foundation Room. What a great idea. I'm glad that there are still classy guys like your friend out there.
belle de ville at June 13, 2009 10:23 AM
Amy,
What you've written has got me thinking about something which I'd like to turn into a quiz for you and your many readers.
In every community let's imagine there are 3 kinds of people:
1. Truly despicable, loathsome individuals.
2. Those who don't fit into #1 but are generally selfish, self-absorbed, and uncaring of strangers.
3. Everyone else.
My belief is that the percentage of people in Category #1 is probably fairly consistent in every community, perhaps 1 or 2% ?
I also tend to believe that the anonymous nature of urban areas allow more people to fall into Category #2 without any negative repercussions.
I can give you my estimates of the percentages here in Vancouver, BC where I live but would prefer to hear from others first.
Robert W. at June 13, 2009 11:16 AM
Robert, you're optimism is showing. In the real world, "everyone else" is group #2, if not group #1.
Crid [CommentCrid@gmail.com] at June 13, 2009 12:02 PM
As far as I'm concerned, there are only two kind of people. My kind of people and assholes. Amy, you're my kind of people. Those Hollyweasels are road kill to me.
Arvin at June 13, 2009 12:57 PM
my guestimate for Robert:
1.) 5%
2.) 45%
3.) 50%
but that can all change in a simple shuffle of the cards. Think anywhere there has been a genocide.
Eric at June 13, 2009 1:11 PM
PS- or anywhere that serves alcohol. Or little league games. About the only place everyone behaves themselves is at an orgy.
Eric at June 13, 2009 1:13 PM
Eric,
I'd like to hope that #1 would only be 1 - 2% but perhaps a research psychologist would know better.
As for #2 & #3, I do believe it varies depending on rural & urban and depending on which city one lives in.
I firmly believe that the more urban an area is, the greater push there is to move people from #3 into the #2 category. One of my favourite writers, Mark Steyn, has essentially asserted that the more socialist a society is, the less people you'll find in the #3 category.
For Vancouver, I would estimate the numbers as follows:
#1 - 2%
#2 - 73%
#3 - 25%
This is a VERY sad reflection on my community but I do believe it to be accurate.
Robert W. at June 13, 2009 4:20 PM
Amy Alkon
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2009/06/13/how_to_speak_ho.html#comment-1653440">comment from Robert W.I despise socialism and find it irrational, but Steyn is wrong about rudness being related to how socialist a society is. I lay out the reason in my book -- based in evidence from a number of sciences and disciplines. However, it's being published October 30, so I don't want to reveal this right now.
Amy Alkon
at June 13, 2009 4:27 PM
> About the only place everyone
> behaves themselves is at an orgy.
In my experience, scuba boats are second place. Very few assholes. If you're the sort of person who has boundary problems, no one's going to want to be hanging out with you at 70 feet when an O-ring let's go.
Crid [CommentCrid@gmail.com] at June 13, 2009 4:39 PM
"I lay out the reason in my book -- based in evidence from a number of sciences and disciplines. However, it's being published October 30, so I don't want to reveal this right now."
So, Amy COULD tell us ... but then she'd HAVE to kill us! Harsh, but fair.
Jay R at June 13, 2009 5:22 PM
Haven't heard you mention SCUBA in years Crid!
Eric at June 13, 2009 7:24 PM
Well, it's been awhile since you mentioned group sex!
Crid [CommentCrid@gmail.com] at June 13, 2009 9:36 PM
Human beings can only handle a tribe of about 100 people. This is why in urban living we must cut down the number of people we feel responsible for. It is a survival instinct.
Tell me - is anyone here brave enough to include themselves in the 73% of #2 that Robert has defined?
Karen at June 14, 2009 7:38 AM
Weel I'm not selfish or self absorbed, but I am uncaring of strangers.
Work a few weekends in a food bank, see how upset someone is that the bread they are getting for free has been squished and you'll stop caring real quick too
lujlp at June 14, 2009 9:49 PM
I don't think I'm selfish or self-absorbed either, but man! the absurd number of people I run into who are boggles the mind.
I think I'm rather uncaring of strangers, too, Loojy. I'm just disgusted by the greed and all the people running around with overinflated senses of entitlement. There's too damn many of them. And it seems like they're the ones who think that everything is "just fine"!
Flynne at June 15, 2009 10:58 AM
"> About the only place everyone
> behaves themselves is at an orgy.
In my experience, scuba boats are second place. Very few assholes. If you're the sort of person who has boundary problems, no one's going to want to be hanging out with you at 70 feet when an O-ring let's go."
The third place that everyone behaves themselves. NRA Pistol and Rifle matches. :-)
Isabel1130 at June 16, 2009 7:10 AM
Studies hav been done where they find 2.5% of the population are sociopaths that effect an additional 15-20% of the population.
Can't remember where I read that. Might be able to google sociopaths.
david M. at June 16, 2009 1:30 PM
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