Customer Service Is Becoming An Issue Everywhere
I hate those customer service lines that are clearly all about anything but serving the customer.
When the recorded voice comes on, I typically say "fuck you," "shit," "motherfucker" -- even if I'm not mad, which I usually am, when I have to call -- because that seems to trigger something in their software that puts you right through to an operator.
What really annoys me is when I have to punch in my number and other information only to be forced to re-give it to the person on the phone. Every time, at some companies (it's not like it's a glitch).
And then there are the record-a-lies, meant to placate me while I'm waiting on the phone for 20 minutes, about how much the company values my business, blah blah blah. If my call were "very important" to you, you'd have a goddamn human on the phone relatively pronto, and without making me go through sixteen forms of tele-acrobatics.
On a related note, I got an e-mail from a suicidal guy the other day. I ended up getting his number and calling him (as I will do with people who write me that they're suicidal), but he wrote in his e-mail that he couldn't get through on the suicide hotline. I'm imagining something along these lines:
Your call is very important to us. We're experiencing a heavy call volume. Please don't jump.
I got him the number of another suicide hotline, of course, just in case. And, things seem under control. Beyond the stuff I said, sometimes, I think it makes enough of a difference, knowing that there's a stranger out there who cares enough that you won't kill yourself that they'll pick up the phone and call you to ask you to stay alive.
"What really annoys me is when I have to punch in my number and other information only to be forced to re-give it to the person on the phone. Every time, at some companies (it's not like it's a glitch)."
YES! WTF is up with that?
I do tech support, and when I call a company it's usually a big tech provider (with names something like Dull and Hewlett-Whackerd). I can't count how many times I've had to repeat my information to multiple folks. You'd think a tech company would figure out how to manage this better.
And I really hate the phone tree system where you have to speak to the computer rather than push a button. "Go fuck yourself" is responded to with "I'm sorry, I didn't get that."
CS isn't a profit center, so I guess they just don't care.
Steve Daniels at March 13, 2010 7:59 AM
I second you comment about having to speak to the computer instead of pushing a button, Steve. I absolutely hate that with a purple passion.
Another one I hate is where their machine calls you and asks you to hold. I mean, WTF is up with that?
William (wbhicks@hotmail.com) at March 13, 2010 8:57 AM
If you are the President of the United States, or my boss, or my boss's boss, you can call me and ask me to hold. Other than that, I don't think so.
Steve Daniels at March 13, 2010 9:08 AM
I completely agree with the computerized "customer service" hate. I just keep hitting the 0 button until the computer gives up and puts a person on. If I didn't want to talk to a person, I'd just do everything on their web site.
Ora at March 13, 2010 9:44 AM
Yeah, the repeating-information thing drives me crazy too. Dirty little secret: Some customer service systems (not all of them, but a significant percentage) are designed to discourage callers so that they will hang up before getting through to a rep. Companies would much rather you email them so they can handle it at leisure, or (increasingly these days) go to some Web forum where users are expected to help each other.
So when you get a phone system where you have to keep repeating information, you can be sure it's one of these. The system doesn't actually do anything with the 16-digit string of numbers you laboriously entered; it only demands the info as a way of weeding out a percentage of callers. Similarly, such systems will also put you on hold for at least a few minutes even if there are reps available. Same goes for those "we are experiencing heavy call volume at the moment" messages; some systems *always* issue those, regardless of the actual number of calls in the system.
There are companies who do it better, though. Back in WordPerfect's heyday, they had a "hold jockey" who played music to the callers on hold, and in between songs he made announcements about wait times and how many calls they were handling at the moment.
Cousin Dave at March 13, 2010 9:48 AM
The only ones that call you and ask you to hold are fraudsters and salesmen. They do that to get around not having enough people to take the robocalls since it's illegal to dial your number and connect you with dead air.
Any time I get a call from a machine, I hang up on it, I don't care who it's from.
brian at March 13, 2010 10:36 AM
Try to imagine what the Department of Health and Human Services Universal Care Medical Services Help Line will be like.
Andrew_M_Garland at March 13, 2010 10:52 AM
Know this website; feel its power—
http://gethuman.com/
Crid at March 13, 2010 11:01 AM
> If you are the President of the
> United States, or my boss, or my boss's
> boss, you can call me and ask me to hold.
No; If you are my boss, or my boss's boss, you can call me and ask me to hold.
Never forget who's working for who.
Crid at March 13, 2010 11:08 AM
I had a company doing that robocall deal this last week. AGI, apparently a company in Michigan thats selling a credit watching program for BofA. Though supposedly its not actually from BofA, they just sold your number to AGI.
They were determined with three to four calls a DAY from them, usually with dead air when I'd bother to pick up the phone. Once I heard a bunch of folks talking in the background of a call center. Caller ID showed they called at 9am, then 11am then 3pm and finally at 7pm one day. No calls since they finally managed to talk to me yesterday offering their crud. Perhaps they finally connected after I'd called them various swear words in two languages. I was one call away from bothering to call Qwest and get their number banned.
Sio at March 13, 2010 12:31 PM
If you want to get their attention. After not too long give up. Then send them a written letter (on paper - not e-mail) and say you bought their product but found it too difficult to work and where unable to get satisifaction via the helpline so you returned the product to the store. Ask them to create better products in the future and have a good CS line.
This should work because a lot of companies - particularly tech product related ones - loose a lot of money to the early return and so are sensitive to it.
The Former Banker at March 13, 2010 2:09 PM
My post mindless verbal Taylorism addresses some of the bad thinking that is driving these problems.
david foster at March 13, 2010 2:14 PM
"> If you are the President of the
> United States, or my boss, or my boss's
> boss, you can call me and ask me to hold.
No; If you are my boss, or my boss's boss, you can call me and ask me to hold.
Never forget who's working for who."
Uh, yeah. I'm pretty sure that's what I said. Oh, you mean the President thing. I don't know, if PotUS rang me up, for reasons passing understanding, I could be persuaded to hold for a bit.
Oh, and I'm also pretty sure it who's working for whom.
Steve Daniels at March 13, 2010 3:02 PM
Might not be relevent in the USA, but we still get fax-spam here in New Zealand. Out of the blue automatic fax transmissions sending advertising. Not only are they wasting everybody's time, but I've had to replace about three rolls of fax paper (at a cost of $6 each)because of this ridiculous practise. I guess I should do an Amy and invoice these companies for the fax paper and my time shopping for it. Love the book Amy.
Chas at March 13, 2010 4:57 PM
The only thing that has stopped me is the feeling that my family and friends deserve better.
Funnily enough, in almost any other regard, I'm a fighter. I'll take on all comers and by Christ I'll keep on swinging until I'm where I want to be. But some of the knocks I've taken in the last few years have hit me so hard that the only thing that keeps me in the game is knowing that other people count on me carrying on. It's a team sport, after all.
It's a hard way to be, but it keeps the days ticking past.
I definitely agree, though, that there are those random acts of absolute kindness, caring and generosity that sometimes just break me up.
Life is a bitch. People make it worth the living.
donald at March 13, 2010 6:39 PM
No Chas send them a fax of a soild black page, over and over and over again
lujlp at March 13, 2010 6:47 PM
I, too, hate having to input info for the machine and then having to repeat it for the live person that eventually comes on. I used to have to call a credit center to open store credit cards, and for a while it was easy to do it the automated way. Unless there was a problem or I put in a wrong number, I could do the whole thing completely automated and get the customer out of there in a few minutes. Then, for whatever reason, I went through the whole automated section, was transfered to a person, and had to give everything again. Including the person's SSN, which I HATED doing over the phone (I always tried to whisper it). It started happening every time and our company finally sent them complaints from all seventy-something stores addressing the issue, because it took twice as long to complete the instant credit. Drove me nuts.
On a good note, I had to call someone at Sprint about my dad's AirCard, and I had the nicest lady ever. She did not treat me like an idiot (i.e., only told me something once unless I asked about it, and she let me skip ahead when I knew some of what I was doing), and she got my phone number to call me back to make sure everything was working correctly. I sent Sprint a glowing comment about her, just like I always do when I receive great customer service. I keep hoping if enough of us do this that it will eventually be more cost-effective to have real people on the phone, as they won't be losing sales do to frustration.
NumberSix at March 13, 2010 9:32 PM
On a semi-related note, Amy has turned me onto comedian Dara O'Briain, who has a bit about using the phonetic alphabet to customer service people over the phone. Apparently B is for Brazilian.
NumberSix at March 13, 2010 9:36 PM
@chas - yeah, they outlawed that in the US many years ago. If someone sends you a junk fax, and you tell them to stop and they don't the fines are pretty huge.
And it's precisely for the reason that they are using your paper/ink/ribbon without your permission, effectively making it petty larceny.
Same reason why they can't spam-call you on a cell phone here. Most plans are not unlimited, and you pay for (or consume from your pool) every minute of incoming and outgoing calls.
brian at March 13, 2010 10:36 PM
Amy Alkon
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2010/03/13/customer_servic.html#comment-1701560">comment from NumberSixI sent Sprint a glowing comment about her, just like I always do when I receive great customer service.
I do this, too. If you complain when it's bad, I think you should give props when it's good. I also tell the person how much I appreciate that they're good when they are.
Amy Alkon at March 14, 2010 12:04 AM
> I'm also pretty sure it who's working for whom.
A properly servile voter would hate to disappoint his Dear Leader with grammar, no?
We covered this once before: My suggestion is more practical than libertarian.
Crid [CridComment at gmail] at March 14, 2010 12:26 AM
I've worked retail since I was nineteen, and there are customers that I can call by name when I run into them in random places (there's also a known shoplifter I can call by name when I call security on her) because they made an impact on me. As many complaints as I've heard over the last eight years (some my fault, most not), I remember the commendations more. A few months into my job at a large department store, I had a customer come back specially to give me a mini Guerlain perfume set. A favorite customer of mine and my store's always emailed home office after she'd been in town shopping, and she would send us cookies and See's Candies truffles every so often. I've had enough nice things done for me when I was on the other side of the cash register, so I figure it's the least I can do to treat other people the same way. Selfish on my part, as it makes me feel good to compliment others on their service. I was out yesterday to my favorite cosmetics store, the liquor store, the grocery store, and for takeout. Every single person that helped me at those places was super nice and I felt so good when I got home.
NumberSix at March 14, 2010 12:32 AM
Crid, I think everyone of working age needs to know what it's like to be yelled at for no reason. It would go a long way to making people treat service industry workers better. I was once yelled at an hour before the store opened because a man had bought an item with a check and then returned the item the next day, and he was unhappy that he couldn't get cash back. He had apparently just been connecting to random extensions until he reached someone (I was there early to do stock) and wanted me to transfer him to the store manager or customer service, neither of whom were in yet. So he proceeded to scream at me because he couldn't have waited another six days to let a check clear and was forced to receive a refund check in the mail. I've been yelled at for something someone in another store did, for things way above my pay grade, and simply because I resembled the person who had screwed up and they thought I was her. Having to deal with that crap would cut down on the mistreatment of cashiers, as well as making more of the people in the service professions treat customers better.
NumberSix at March 14, 2010 12:47 AM
my favorite is when i'm shopping for car insurance and then the companies i DIDN'T pick call or email me incessantly. um, if your price was good enough, you'd ALREADY have my business, you wouldn't have to beg me for it.
FYI though, two companies that i've had EXCELLENT CS from - 21st auto insurance, where i've never spent more than 2 minutes on hold and that's only because i asked to speak with a specific individual (who called me back the next day when he said he would, and then called AGAIN because i was late getting home from work to make sure i was ok). the insurance is great too and the cheapest i could find. wells fargo is the second company, always get a real person and fairly quickly and they know what they're talking about. just fyi.
whatever at March 14, 2010 2:31 AM
"Same reason why they can't spam-call you on a cell phone here."
Gah- I've got one that keeps calling me even though I've told them to take me off their list. I've programmed the number into my phone so that it comes up Telemarketer, and can "ignore" it. My other favorite is the one "Prison Scam". Had to explain those to my daughter as she was fiddling with my phone.
Juliana at March 14, 2010 6:16 AM
> I think everyone of working age needs to know
> what it's like to be yelled at for no reason.
That's kind of a harsh way of putting it. I think there are a lot of kids who never get a foothold in the working world because they never understand that the people they meet in the marketplace aren't the enemy: The fact that your boss wants to pay you as little for your time as he can doesn't mean he's a bad guy. If you come from poverty and a family with unemployment, you might never understand that. You'll always think the whole point of your existence is to screw other people instead of letting them screw you first.
But if –on some morning in your early years– you arrive at work and hear someone phoning in with the same adversarial mentality that you had the day before, you might start to see how an economy isn't an entirely adversarial venture. It's not all about you. It's not all about making you rich and it's not all about keeping you poor.
Crid [CridComment at gmail] at March 14, 2010 7:06 AM
Had a very positive experience this AM with an AT&T customer service guy in the Philippines who was helping me diagnose a DSL problem.
*However*, AT&T would have been able to avoid this call in the first place, and probably save about $20 in the costs of the one call (multiplied by tens of thousands of calls, I am sure) had they done a better job of understanding potential problems & failure modes and provided better info/tools for their customers.
Telcos as a class fail to understand that they are selling a commodity service and that the most important way of differentiating themselves is simply by making it easier to do business with them.
david foster at March 14, 2010 9:04 AM
But if –on some morning in your early years– you arrive at work and hear someone phoning in with the same adversarial mentality that you had the day before, you might start to see how an economy isn't an entirely adversarial venture. It's not all about you. It's not all about making you rich and it's not all about keeping you poor.
That was actually my point, Crid. I think if more people experienced the other side of the service industry, they would be more judicious in their complaints. Complaining to the cashier about a store policy is no more effective than yelling at the telemarketer on the phone. They are not the ones who deserve it. Amy has the right idea in complaining to the company rather than taking it out on someone who is simply doing his job. I was management at my last job, and I was forever having to rescue one of the part-time workers from the clutches of an angry customer who wouldn't ask for the manager. It was my job to take the complaints, not Sally at the register who couldn't do a damn thing about it. You can only change policy you don't like by complaining to the right people.
NumberSix at March 14, 2010 1:08 PM
Yeah. And you gotta get 'em young.
Crid at March 14, 2010 1:15 PM
I would guess that just about everyone who has had a job for any amount of time of has been yield for something that was not really their fault or in their control.
I suspect being yelled at can do two things: 1. make the yellee less likely to yell. 2. make the yellee feel justifiied in yelling at another point.
It does seem like a lot of people view work (even life) as trying to screw someone before they screw you.
The Former Banker at March 14, 2010 2:15 PM
It does seem like a lot of people view work (even life) as trying to screw someone before they screw you.
Thus Crid's advice about getting them young. The younger ones would be more likely to change their behavior upon realizing it does not feel so good to be yelled at for something not your fault. Not so easy with people who have been exposed longer to the "screw 'em before they screw you" philosophy of working life.
NumberSix at March 14, 2010 2:52 PM
"I think if more people experienced the other side of the service industry, they would be more judicious in their complaints."
Reminds me of something I read about making marriages work (possibly even here, with Amy). In the face of a disagreement, you can divide people into two groups:
Guess which kind of people are able to build lasting relationships...
I think this applies equally to the customer service side of things. There are too many people to whom the other side of the argument is simply irrelevant. There is a whole web-site that allows people in the service industry to vent.
bradley13 at March 14, 2010 11:45 PM
I keep an American credit card, even though I live Europe. This card (and your card as well) has a non-800 number on the back. You are supposed to call this number collect if you are calling from overseas.
What I've noticed since doing this is that I always get a human directly. I guess since they are paying for a collect international call you get priority.
Just saying.
Evil HR Lady at March 15, 2010 3:55 AM
I feel compelled to give props to Citibank's customer service. I know, they're evil, or so I'm told. But some of their customer service reps are wonderful. Like the woman who helped me get a handle on my dad's finances, even when I didn't have power of attorney and he couldn't remember any of his personal information.
MonicaP at March 15, 2010 6:38 AM
Citi was a nightmare for me with an elderly relative, and I did have power of attorney. They will never, ever be forgiven. Nightmare. Citibank. Nightmare.
Crid [CridComment at gmail] at March 15, 2010 6:42 AM
Hate Citibank. And Sovereign. Although I think Sovereign was absorbed or taken over by Citibank. And Providian. Hated them too.
Flynne at March 15, 2010 7:24 AM
I am a counselor for a crisis hotline, and in addition to the local hotline we also answer the Lifeline, a national suicide hotline. It is truly truly unfortunate that the suicidal man was not able to get anyone to talk to. Did you give him the Lifeline number? The number bounces to different hotlines until someone picks up, it's not like the first time he calls there is a prompt that says that everyone is busy.
It is also the beginning of suicide season - the beginning of spring invariably presents an increase in suicides. Also Dr. Phil did a talk on teen suicide, giving the Lifeline number, so we expect to receive more calls.
Kate at March 15, 2010 8:00 AM
Amy Alkon
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2010/03/13/customer_servic.html#comment-1701773">comment from KateYes, I did, Kate. Thanks for posting that. I think he must've called a local one.
Amy Alkon at March 15, 2010 8:05 AM
Consider the Golden Gate Bridge– This is a fascinating graphic. (Outta links, it's from an article on the SFGate dot com site a few years ago.) Note the preponderance of action on the Bay side as opposed to the ocean side. Even in our grimmest hours, we're profoundly social critters.
Crid [CridComment at gmail] at March 15, 2010 11:36 AM
There's a great Barenaked Ladies song called "War on Drugs" that was inspired by the Luminous Veil on the Prince Edward Viaduct in Toronto. It was built (at a cost of C$5.5 million) to discourage jumpers, but the suicidal simply moved to the next bridge down. Money like that could be better spent hiring live people at the hotlines. I know this is in Canada, but the principle stands.
NumberSix at March 15, 2010 1:57 PM
They talked about that in Part 5.
Crid [CridComment at gmail] at March 15, 2010 8:29 PM
Good to know that it did seem to work for the Canadians, but I wonder what the number of lives saved by having better access to hotlines and such would be. Just because that worked (which I think is great, don't get me wrong) doesn't mean something else wouldn't work better. Tricky issue, this.
NumberSix at March 15, 2010 9:02 PM
Yeah, it gets down to how much of a dick you want to be about suicide.
I want to be pretty dicky, but not endlessly so. People who are really in pain and want out shouldn't live in a police state so tight that they're not permitted to depart.
But Cobain was an asshole. (I liked Lithium, though. Didn't you?)
The thing to remember is that suicide is redundant... There's a death out there for each of us, and yours will find you whether you go looking for it or not... So/and, most suicidal ideation is theatrical and sentimental, hence the dives into the bay side and not the ocean side. In my experience, the San Francisco skyline is plenty affecting even when you complete your trip across the bridge. The city and human civilization (etc.) do not view our completion of that famous transit as some sort of capitulation or submission to the world's cruelties... They just don't care.
Crid [CridComment at gmail] at March 15, 2010 9:54 PM
I personally view every suicide as a tragedy, but I understand why some people are driven to it. And yeah, anyone who is really bound and determined to kill themselves will find a way to do it, no matter what we do to try to stop them.
The only Nirvana song I ever heard that I thought was really cool was "Come As You Are".
Cousin Dave at March 16, 2010 7:58 AM
I'm pretty sure that most suicide hotlines are volunteer-based. It's sad not to get someone picking up the phone, but it's not as though it's a service that anyone is ENTITLED to, especially when the person on the other hand is probably not getting paid for their time.
Shannon at March 20, 2010 5:48 PM
Do you not think that if you're offering something purported to be life-saving, then it would be best to have adequate staffing? I'm not sure the man thinking about going over the bridge and listening to a muzak version of "Take on Me" would think to himself, "Well, hell, nobody's answering, but I guess I should have some sympathy, seeing as the staff isn't making any money off me." If you are offering any sort of service, it is only right that you try to have staff to match the need, be they salaried or volunteer.
NumberSix at March 20, 2010 10:50 PM
Very cool and I just bookmarked your site!
callcenterguy at May 5, 2010 2:14 PM
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