One and two.

Perhaps the finest aphorism of all time.

Tweet, Tweet

Tweet, Tweet

Tweet, Tweet

Tweet, Tweet

Tweet, (golden) Tweet

To get to the water slide

You spend your whole day looking for
clever things on Twitter?

> You spend your whole day looking for
> clever things on Twitter?

Nobody has to do that... When you know who to follow, it's like a faucet of clever.

Iowahawk is a national treasure, not just the Internet kind.

If only this were likely.

On that day that Barry agreed to pay off Hillary's campaign debt, all the sudden they were friends again.

Interesting, nuance-y new oppression technique!

If we use domestic law enforcement to respond to abject murder overseas, then our Department of State won't be bothered with unpleasant questions!

...At the mere cost of the First Amendment.

Seeing this happen in Germany gives it extra texture...

...But if there were a public screening of "Innocence of Muslims" in Los Angeles, I'd want to buy a ticket and enjoy some popcorn.

When our president said "the United States rejects efforts to denigrate the religious beliefs of others," he was incorrect. That is literally not true.

Amy's right, and that always pisses me off anyway.

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?

He heard that the ref was calling fowls.

My daughter's FB status:

I feel that my Iphone dying is likely similar to the experience of impotence - I have this really awesome tool, but I can't use it

Two Middle East mothers are sitting in the cafe strip chatting over a pint of goat's milk. The older of the mothers pulls her bag out and starts
flipping through pictures and they start reminiscing.

"This is my oldest son Mohammed. He's 24 years old now"
"Yes, I remember him as a baby" says the other mother cheerfully.
"He's a martyr now though" mum confides.
"Oh so sad dear" says the other.
"And this is my second son Kalid. He's 21"
"Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly hair when he was born".
"He's a martyr too " says mum quietly.
"Oh gracious me ...." says the other.
"And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He's 18", she whispers.
"Yes" says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school".
"He's a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes.
After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says... "They blow up so fast."

They grow up even faster when you do this

https://twitter.com/jttozer/status/246847127924375552/photo/1/large

What a cute photo. This at a protest (about the video of course) where they beat up a couple of cops. At least she got a lovely photo to show at his notional 21st. If he makes it that far.

To add insult to injury, our Communications Minister's response to the protests

http://www.theage.com.au/national/conroy-urges-youtube-to-pull-video-20120916-2606t.html#ixzz26cYzXcEY

"clearly offensive and (YouTube's owner) Google should review its terms of service to see if they are being appropriately applied in this case."

Perhaps we should just run everything past a sharia court before screening it? I'm ashamed.

"Why Did The Chicken Cross The Moat?"

To get to the beam in the other chicken's eye. (Yeah, I know, sorry about the pun.)