Starbucks is using the latest in customer service training. Training that it wouldn't hurt doctors to have but they do need to have a certain amount of dispassion. A doctor that over empathizes could potentially over prescribe or perform other unnecessary interventions in an effort to give a patient some satisfaction.

Optimizing for two different things. Baristas are optimizing for customer satisfaction, while doctors are optimizing for patient health. If a barista had more doctor training, she might suggest that too much coffee isn't good for you, and will make you jittery, so maybe you should switch to chamomile tea.

That said, I've never really had a problem with asshole doctors. I've come across a few slightly brusque ones in dealing with others' care, but as for my own, I'll just switch to another doctor who isn't a jerk if I don't like my doctor. Most of them have been fine.

The other problem is the emotional intelligence of a customer as well as the situation. Most times Starbucks isn't telling the customer they have some incurable disease that is going to kill the customer within three years.

Life is an STD with a 100% mortality rate.

And then there's the raft of foreign born MDs, many of whom have poor language skills, cultural issues and so many other faults. My own experience with a Chinese immigrant Dr. who refused to diagnose my failing thyroid (she said "Mommy is tired") resulted with her being dropped by her practice. I wish I had had the energy and the $$ to go after her license. When the gov't runs health care, this all get worse before it gets better.

I'd rather have an asshole for a doctor, I'm not going to them for self actualization

Plus as most peoplpe are morons who prefer form over substance having a cold doc means they'll have more time for me

You can't get all personal and be medically competent. It would rip your heart out and drive you insane. I am a nursing student, and I also worked at Disney World, home of the worlds best customer service. 2 different worlds, 2 different needs to fill. I want my Dr good. Period. I don't care HOW he/she acts bedside, I want them to know their shit. That's all I ask.

So, I didn't *think* I cared about my doctor's personality/emotional capacity/etc... until I had the OB from hell. I kid you not, she thought nothing of leaving me "hanging" as it were in the middle of my "lady exam" and just sort of walking off for a couple minutes.

She also spoke to me like I'm a moron. Now, granted there are a LOT of morons out there, but I AM in a fairly well-educated area. Also, I have a degree in genetic epidemiology, so I'm not totally useless around big medical terms (I took multiple med-school classes for my degree). In fact, any new doctor I have I warn them that we'll both be happier if they use big doctor words & assume I'll understand, because I'll ask if I don't. She'd the only one this has caused a problem with. Regardless, I didn't really need her to explain to me that being pregnant meant there was a baby "in there."

Clearly, she wasn't a fan of mine either because after the baby came out, when it was her day to round on the patients, she didn't actually step foot into my room. She just sort of said my chart looked good and stayed in the door (the other doctors were obsessed with the state of my uterus & had to poke at it).

Nearly forgot. I DO think doctors should be taught to listen better to their patients. I think this is lost since there are pressures to see more patients and try to get them to fit into neat little boxes.

If my first OB (not the one from hell) had listened better, he wouldn't have freaked out w/my first pregnancy. He was concerned because the baby was "too small" for the dates, but wouldn't listen that I wasn't a every-4-week kinda gal (more like 6). This lead to a BUNCH of unnecessary testing. I understand the CYA component, but the 20 negative home-tests during weeks 4 & 5 should have had some contribution to these decisions. Mind, he was good on empathy & doctoring otherwise.

On a completely different note - I did have to see a new OB about 6 months ago. He was new to the practice and pretty much straight out of school/fellowship stuff. When I gave him my "use big words" speech, he went off on a tirade against dentists and PhDs who use the title "Doctor" because "you're not a doctor unless you go through residency." He also stated that "residency is really hard" as if it were the most difficult thing on earth. I wouldn't want to do it, & I respect those who finish medical school & all, but probably not the best chip to have when you deal with pregnant women all day!

I'm so much happier with my current female MD. She is a great listener and actually welcomes questions. I had a male MD who would not test me for diabetes until the MD I worked for sent him a note. My boss MD had been advising me that I was diabetic for over 2 years, but I could not convince the Doctor that I was paying to do the test.

I have 2 friends who are crusty old Veterans and it surprised me to learn that they both insist on a female primary care doctor. Both say that the women doctors are better listeners, with one switching away from an American male doctor to an Asian female. Even with the language issues, he still feels more fully understood.

And that is what empathy is all about. Too many people feel worse instead of better after a Doctor visit.

I wish people would be more forthcoming about bad doctors. It is hard to get people to speak honestly about their docs. It shouldn't be any different than complaining about a bad contractor or plumber.

I'd rather have an asshole for a doctor, I'm not going to them for self actualization

Ditto. What I want are doctors with better research/analytical problem solving skills. In grad school, I complained about fatigue and was tested for thyroid deficiency but since I was in the normal range nothing was done. I asked what defined the range (1 sigma of a Gaussian distribution?) in case I could be at the low end of the range but still deficient but the doctor clearly didn't understand statistical distributions. (Pre-med students in science classes are mostly known for coming into office hours to argue every single point you took off an assignment more than they are for absorbing the material.)

Three years later I complained about fatigue to another doctor, was tested, and what do you know?--I'm hypothyroid. Sigh.

I think empathy/listening/emotional-intelligence skills do matter for doctors....Analytical abilities are critical and also probably could stand improvement, but if you can't get the patient to tell you the right information, or don't listen to it when he does tell you, then the analytical skills aren't going to do much good.

(I suspect also that people with poor listening skills are very often people who jump quickly to conclusions.)

In aviation, it has been found that quite a few very serious accidents were caused by poor communication skills among crew members, and "CRM" (crew resource management or cockpit resource management) training programs have been put in place in the hope of reducing this problem.

Too bad there aren't really that many diagnosticians in the world. That is what House really was.

They are the ones who have an analytical bent, years of experience, etc. that can look at a chart, the person. and say it is one of these three things.

Dr. House or Dr. Wilson - it really doesn't matter except to the patient. It comes down to choice.

For several months, I went to a doctor that was a 2-hour drive away, he was often (no, make that always) running late. Schedule yourself for a 10:00 AM appointment and he might see you by noontime. A lot of his patients complained about this; I, on the other hand, loved it because when I was in the exam room nothing else existed except me and my problems. Doctors who are always on time are likely to be constant clock watchers and NOT giving the patient his/her full attention in my experience. But, it really is up to each patient what they prefer, no?

If you prefer a Dr. House who is rude and a jerk, but you think he is giving you the best treatment - that is your choice. If you prefer a doctor who has great bedside manner because you prefer a "whole" approach to your treatment, that is also your choice.

Will Obamacare eventually take that choice away? Right now, Obamacare supporters say it won't; but, we all know that things such a liberties (and choices) are slowly chipped away until it is too late to go back.

> And then there's the raft of foreign born MDs, many
> of whom have poor language skills, cultural issues
> and so many other faults.

I recently went through this with a couple of dentist's offices in WLA owned by, um, immigrants from an ancient middle-eastern nation.

They were pleasant enough during treatments. But on the phone and through associates, they didn't seem to understand that they were dealing with paying customers; they were condescending and distant.

If you prefer a Dr. House who is rude and a jerk, but you think he is giving you the best treatment - that is your choice. If you prefer a doctor who has great bedside manner because you prefer a "whole" approach to your treatment, that is also your choice.

Yes. Also, it's not necessarily an either/or thing. Plenty of doctors are the whole package.

Being chronically very late would make me nuts. Many people have to schedule doctor appointments around work and other appointments, and needing to block out your whole day for a single appointment is stressful. I respect my doctor's time by being on time for appointments, and, barring an emergency, I expect the same.

Personal experience: most of the assholes I encounter in the medical field are nurses and office staff. I've actually met very few dick doctors, although I know they're out there.

There's only one doc (a male gynecologist)who I switched from due to his mannerisms (mostly lack of listening). He was very thorough when it came to examinations, but he refused to accept my adamant desire to not have children. Also, about a year after he put me on the BC patch, he asked about the regularity of my periods (at risk of TMI, I was insanely heavy). I gleefully told him my periods had completely ceased shortly after starting the patch. He argued with me, and then dismissed my claim as bogus, because the literature he had stated I should have a period whenever the patch came off. Sorry, but either I bleed or I don't, and I don't need a medical degree to tell me how to distinguish between the two.