The People Most In Need Of Education Are School Officials
Constitutional law professor Eugene Volokh blogs at the WaPo that a 9-year-old boy was being bullied for bringing a "My Little Pony" bag to school. School officials' solution? Telling the boy to stop bringing the bag.
Volokh writes:
This story struck me much like the story of the high school kids told not to wear American flag T-shirts on Cinco de Mayo, because of thuggery by some of their classmates.It may well be that the school may restrict speech that yields a disruptive reaction by some listeners, given Tinker v. Des Moines Independent Community School District (1969); the First Amendment generally bans such governmental enforcement of a "heckler's veto," but the matter may be different in K-12 schools. And I understand school authorities' desire to stop the disruption, and get back to teaching.
But such reaction by schools itself teaches students something -- it teaches bullies that, if they threaten enough disruption, the school will react against their victims. At this point, it's just 9-year-olds, and 9-year-olds do some dumb things. (The "thugs" in my headline is a bit facetious, though not much.) But they can be taught before they grow up into 15-year-olds, or 20-year-olds.
In particular, if the school used this as an opportunity to teach kids that they can't beat kids up for being fans of material that is seen as "too girly," the high school students that these kids will grow into might be more tolerant of speech and behavior they disapprove of. And if the school teaches kids that, if they push others around, the school will make those others conform, then the high school students of the future will learn that lesson, too.
via @AndreaKuszewksi
I rarely say this, but I kind of agree with the school on this one.
Stay with me for a moment:
Q. What was the goal here?
A. To end the targeting of this student.
That was it, that was all, nothing more, nothing less. It wasn't to create a profound social change, not to turn douchebags into nice people, just to stop the problem of one single student.
I haven't heard anyone say that this approach was unsuccessful IN THIS CASE.
The cold hard truth here is that whether you want to admit it or not, the bullied frequently have a role in their own targeting. Looking back from the perspective of years, I sure did.
Bullies are a problem, they're douchebags not frequently punished properly by the schools, not managed by parents, this does need to be addressed.
But there is nothing wrong with looking at what makes kids a target, and addressing that too when you can. I would argue that there is a problem with NOT addressing the other side of the coin.
Miss Alkon you have written frequently about taking responsibility for yourself, consequences, what makes someone a victim etc etc etc. Should this not fall in line with the same discussion on how to not be a victim?
Much as I would like to end bullying forever, we all know that isn't possible, hell frequently its like porn, you know it when you see it, but good luck defining it.
So where we can stop the targeting of a child by helping that child understand and avoid the things that make them vulnerable, doesn't that make sense?
I understand the concern that bullies will take the wrong lesson from this…but quite frankly I doubt it, if bullies learned lessons, then they'd have learned not to be douchebags from all the people teaching them not to be, over the course of their lives.
Robert at March 19, 2014 3:17 AM
Miss Alkon you have written frequently about taking responsibility for yourself, consequences, what makes someone a victim etc etc etc. Should this not fall in line with the same discussion on how to not be a victim?
Great thinking. I propose that every Christian who feels persecuted for his or her religion be told that crucifix jewelry, WWJD bracelets and carrying a Bible to school or work be told to knock it off immediately. They need to take responsibility for not making themselves victims.
Kevin at March 19, 2014 5:32 AM
Robert: "I haven't heard anyone say that this approach was unsuccessful IN THIS CASE."
WTF? In this case, this was/is UNsuccessful.
It is unsuccessful because the kid is not just being bullied by his classmates, now he is also being bullied by those who should be stopping the bullying!
Robert, you write with such a great sense of irony:
Well, if gays just stopped being so gay we wouldn't be forced to beat them up.
See, I can write with irony too!
Charles at March 19, 2014 5:50 AM
Wow Robert. Also by your logic no one should ever do something, say something, or wear something that someone, somewhere deems is too different, because it might be disruptive. Let's just make sure everyone conforms to some made up ideal of how every kid, in every school should behave. Oh yeah, that won't work because people are individuals!
You don't stop bullying by giving the bullies a free pass on their behavioe. I think the best way to put an end to this particular incident is to sit down with the kids causing the problem and their parents. Tell them, this ends today, if it doesn't and if you continue then your consequences will be ______. This school just taught those bullies that it doesn't matter what they do, or who they target, because they won't be held responsible. Yeah that's a good way to stop bad behavior.
sarainhb at March 19, 2014 6:10 AM
Q. What was the goal here?
A. To end the targeting of this student.
That was it, that was all, nothing more, nothing less. It wasn't to create a profound social change, not to turn douchebags into nice people, just to stop the problem of one single student.
Ok, so if I threaten enough violence, then the "government" should throttle your free speech? that's the lesson I'm getting. Amy stop Robert from posting or I'll burn the website down. Burn. It. Down.
Here's an alternative: grab the offended, pull them aside and ask them does that student's choice affect you in any meaningful way? no? then leave him the fuck alone.
Here's a thought experiment for you, Robert. Imagine if someone suggested your advice to every minority who gets some level of static from The Majority. Stop pissing off the majority and you'll get along famously. Is that reasonable?
I R A Darth Aggie at March 19, 2014 6:30 AM
What I remember of my school daze is that bullies are ultimately cowards[*]. If you don't back down, and are willing to punch a few of them in the nose and make them bleed, they'll get the idea that maybe, just maybe they should look elsewhere for their fun.
Of course, that was back in the day when the police didn't arrest 9 year olds for fighting...
[*] which is very true of internet bullies
I R A Darth Aggie at March 19, 2014 6:34 AM
I'm w/Robert in that the school can multi-task on this problem.
Immediate solution is to stop the bullying so explain it to the kid (hell I don't care if he brings a Barbie doll to school. his parent's choice. he can suffer real world consequences.)
Take care of bully kids in a separate action. (Parents need to make school does this or raise hell.)
Damn right things attract notice. Duh! Figure it out early and learn. Predators of all types love docile, unaware, not fighting back people. So easy. Taste good. Yum. Yum.
Wear what you want. Walk where/when you want. Protect yourself accordingly and suffer the learning process (damn there were 5 of them not 3).
Life 's a bitch/bastard.
Robert in Texas at March 19, 2014 6:45 AM
"So where we can stop the targeting of a child by helping that child understand and avoid the things that make them vulnerable, doesn't that make sense?"
They're two different things. Yes, help the child understand. But also teach the rest of the students a thing of two about bullying, namely, that if the students in general will stand up to it, then the bullying will stop.
There's actually a huge problem in that today's schools have painted themselves into a corner regarding the handling of bullies. Back in the day, one tactic would be to have a respected male teacher or coach bring a My Little Pony bag to school... oh snap, schools don't have those anymore. And if the students, specifically the other boys, could be taught a few things about self-defense and standing up for yourself, the problem would solve itself... but no, schools today don't allow students to defend themselves against bullies. So the school itself takes on the problem of stopping the bullying directly, a problem which it is totally unprepared to solve.
Cousin Dave at March 19, 2014 7:42 AM
You don't stop bullying by giving the bullies a free pass on their behavioe. I think the best way to put an end to this particular incident is to sit down with the kids causing the problem and their parents
This is how the bullying of me in junior high stopped. A gang of girls followed me around, taunted me, threw things at me. My dad went to the principal.
Guess what: The bullying is unlikely to stop (of this kid) because he no longer brings the bag to school.
Amy Alkon at March 19, 2014 7:53 AM
I'll write something fuller about this on my own blog, but I agree with Amy: the bullying will only stop until the bullies are brought up short. I've seen bullying get stopped by teacher intervention -- on both sides of the equation.
Mike at March 19, 2014 8:26 AM
Q. What was the goal here?
A. To end the targeting of this student.
Banning the lunch box will not end the targeting of this student. He will always be the "kid who brought the My Little Pony lunch box" to those who torment him.
A friend of mine in middle/high school was very religious and dressed in very modest clothing that made her look different from other students. Around 9th grade, she started making an effort to dress more "on trend" -- modest, but well-fitting clothes and cute t-shirts with a long-sleeved shirt underneath, instead of the huge skirts and turtle necks she was wearing before.
And guess what? Until the day she graduated, kids were still saying, "Hey, where's your NUN outfit? Where's your Cosby sweater? OOOHhhhh you're showing a little neck, there, you slut!"
It never stops. But, at least, for her, our vice principal took a stand and punished the bullies and encouraged my friend to come to her with the names of whoever taunted her. Having an adult on your side means a lot to bullied kids. Even if they can't stop the bullying, it sends the kid a message that they're worthwhile. This poor kid isn't getting even that.
sofar at March 19, 2014 8:35 AM
You can't help kids who won't help themselves...
ParatrooperJJ at March 19, 2014 9:36 AM
Downey: I don't understand... Colonel Jessup said he ordered the Code Red.
Galloway: I know but...
Downey: Colonel Jessup said he ordered the Code Red! What did we do wrong?
Galloway: It's not that simple...
Downey: What did we do wrong? We did nothing wrong!
Dawson: Yeah we did. We were supposed to fight for people who couldn't fight for themselves. We were supposed to fight for Willy.
Jim P. at March 19, 2014 10:51 AM
I think the bullies and their parents should be encouraged to sit down together and watch some episodes of "My Little Pony." My 4-year-old daughter loves the show, and I find it funny and smart. More importantly, though, it does have some very good lessons on friendship, i.e. not being a douchebag.
Sosij at March 19, 2014 11:34 AM
That little freak needs to conform to the social norms the bullies have set down for him and make life easier for the school administrators.
Doesn't he have any sense of responsibility?
Gog_Magog_Carpet_Reclaimers at March 19, 2014 11:43 AM
Cousin Dave -
That's how my bully disappeared. My mom called in a favor to a teacher friend of hers and the male gym teacher put my bully up against the wall.
Still, if you're going to ironically sport some My Little Pony gear, you need to make the irony a little more clear. Otherwise it comes off a bit like you're carrying your blankie around with you.
smurfy at March 19, 2014 1:40 PM
Speaking of irony, I clearly remember asking my bully why he was picking on me. His answer, "because you're a dick."
I guess Linus got away with toting his blankie around, but his older sister ran the place.
smurfy at March 19, 2014 1:47 PM
"You can't help kids who won't help themselves..."
Posted by: ParatrooperJJ at March 19, 2014 9:36 AM
Then you are worthless as an adult.*
*I'm lobbing this insult only at adults who are at least nominally able-bodied and -minded. No insult intended otherwise.
Michelle at March 19, 2014 3:30 PM
Robert:
"Q. What was the goal here?
A. To end the targeting of this student.
"The cold hard truth here is that whether you want to admit it or not, the bullied frequently have a role in their own targeting."
In this video a boy with long, fluffy white hair and tight pink pants gets targeted by a bully. Using an effective type of communication skills he is able to make the bully understand how being bullied makes him feel, and convinces the bully to stop targeting him:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2bhDKbt9rIo
Whudduya think?
Ken R at March 20, 2014 1:37 AM
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