I Can Garrote You With A Piece Of Dental Floss
I might even be able to kill you with a toothbrush.
There's been yet another example that teachers and administrators are the dumbest people in elementary schools.
On a related note, I probably had access to knives from about age 5 or 6 on, so I could cut up apples. I sometimes brought one to school in my lunch. My mother's greatest worry was -- no, not that I'd launch a mass slaying, but that the knife wouldn't make it back home to be washed and taken back to school the next time she gave me an apple.
Well, it's 2014 now, and things have changed. Now bringing a wee paring knife to school is -- yes -- grounds for suspension. Maybe even expulsion. Even if your intentions only appear to be slicing fruit.
Lenore Skenazy writes at reason:
Da'von Shaw, a Bedford, Ohio high school student, brought apples and craisins to school for a "healthy eating" presentation...
And wouldn't you know it, he ended up with a five-day suspension.
The superintendent suggested that Da'von's punishment could actually have been much worse: an entire year's suspension. I guess the school was being incredibly lenient when it decided not to put Da'von's life on hold for a year over nothing.A while back, when we first started hearing about these zero tolerance follies, I might have sputtered something like, "What are we teaching kids when a school refuses to make any distinction between actual danger and normal life?" But now I realize: We are teaching kids precisely what they need to learn in a hyper-terrified society. They need to understand that society today refuses to distinguish between an infinitesimal risk and a huge one. Zero tolerance is perfect training.
Some day, if he doesn't do something crazy like bring a nailclipper to school, Da'von will graduate. Eventually, he will matriculate into American adulthood, where, if he wants an easy time of it, he will not roll his eyes when a TSA agent confiscates his 3.5 oz tube of Pepsodent, and not slam the door when a cop comes to investigate him for letting his son play at the park, unsupervised.
In other words: To get along as he goes along, Da'Von will be expected--required!--to accept safety hysteria as a way of life.
Obedience training for the American public. Hooozagooboy!
Indeed. I have carried a pocket knife my whole life, including as a kid. It's a useful tool, not only for the knife, but for the other tools often attached.
When was the last time one student stabbed another? And if they don't have a knife handy, they can always pick up a pair of scissors, or a rock, or for that matter a chair. Will we next be bolting the furniture to the floor?
Insanity. It has the effect of training kids to be scared of their own shadows, but that's just a nice side-effect that the government is happy to use. It really comes down to purest incompetence, and unwillingness to accept responsibility, on the part of school administrators and those bureaucrats who set school policy.
a_random_guy at November 6, 2014 6:29 AM
A pencil or pen are deadly weapons. When the schools figure this out, with they shut down to protect the children?
Matt at November 6, 2014 7:10 AM
Regarding the fact that this was a demo for "healthy eating," you know what would be healthy? Having administrators who think out of their brain instead of their ass.
Amy Alkon at November 6, 2014 12:01 PM
Are you not aware of the old Klingon proverb that tells us that four thousand throats may be cut in one night by a running man?
I carried a humongous swiss army knife in high school. I now carry a more modest Leatherman on my hip, and a locking pocket knife in a pocket.
I suspect that many people would get a case of the vapors if I merely walked near a school.
I R A Darth Aggie at November 6, 2014 3:14 PM
When I was in high school, me and my friends tried to figure out if there was anything that could not be used as a weapon. Our conclusion: a single short wet noodle. For every other object, someone in the group could weaponize it. Blinding agents and smothering agents include a vast array of common things and it is surprising how many things become dangerous when you sharpen an edge.
Matt at November 6, 2014 10:35 PM
I think I've made this very point here before.
I have read about schools being upset about PLASTIC knives being sent in (for those poor kids who would like to eat an apple while wearing orthodontia). I once visited a friend in the mental health wing of a hospital. While they had to turn everything in, even the institutionalized were allowed plastic knives for eating.
Our school district's weapon policy used to state that a weapon is anything that can be used to harm another individual. I just checked and it must have been changed in the last year or two (new superintendent must have a brain cell). I remember reading the original version and thinking, "There go pencils, books, chairs, all the gym equipment, computer keyboards, electric outlets, anything with a cord, and well, basically everything!"
The only time I was ever injured by another student in school (and it was on purpose), the weapon of choice was a pencil.
Shannon at November 7, 2014 6:20 AM
I like it. Another piece of evidence that the system is collapsing like a bunch of broccoli.
Gog_Magog_Carpet_Reclaimers at November 7, 2014 6:55 PM
"The superintendent suggested that Da'von's punishment could actually have been much worse: an entire year's suspension."
How would that have been worse? The more kids they suspend the more kids there will be who are better off. And the longer they suspend them the more better off they'll be.
People need to get their precious children the hell away from those wing nuts.
Ken R at November 7, 2014 11:00 PM
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