Sorry, Gwyneth, But That Particular "Carpet" Doesn't Need Steam-Cleaning
Ann Robinson writes in The Guardian of a recommendation Gwyneth Paltrow made on her goop.com website:
...A recommendation that women steam-clean their vaginas for extra energy, to rebalance female hormones and for a squeaky clean uterus:The real golden ticket here is the Mugwort V-Steam. You sit on what is essentially a mini-throne, and a combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al."
...To give steamed vagina the seriousness it doesn't deserve, let's see if there's any science behind the extravagant claims. Mugwort, for instance, is an aromatic herb used in Chinese traditional medicine and as a food flavouring. In South Korea it's used in rice cakes and soup. And in LA it's used to steam vaginas.
Not in my part of Los Angeles.
Robinson explains why this is squirrel poop. An excerpt:
The water vapour in steam isn't a good idea either. The vagina is kept naturally well lubricated with oily substances. Water isn't hydrating to cells. On the contrary, water can wash away natural oils, leaving the vagina poorly lubricated and more prone to cuts and irritation. Thrush, caused by an overgrowth of candida, thrives on warm, damp conditions, so is a definite risk from steaming.All of our orifices, including ears, nose, anus and vagina, are essentially self- cleaning. The pH of the vagina, natural mix of bacteria that live in it, mucus plug that sits at the top of the vagina and lining of the womb all work harmoniously and effectively together to ensure that bugs from the outside world generally don't invade upwards from the vagina to the fallopian tubes. Infection can happen from sexually transmitted infections, contraceptive coils or other surgical procedures. But mostly it's a very well-run system.
The claim that the steam clean could balance hormones is irrational. Hormones are produced by organs such as the brain and ovaries, travel in the bloodstream and have specific effects on their target organs. Steaming the vagina cannot possibly impact on hormone levels. I urge you to put the kettle away, throw the mugwort in some soup and consciously uncouple from this website.
Great headline.
Kevin at January 30, 2015 12:41 PM
What a douche!
Kettle at January 30, 2015 1:54 PM
Well, if she wants to be more. . . energized, I suggest she use live steam.
(evil grin)
Keith Glass at January 30, 2015 2:06 PM
Who would have expected that a person who has spent her adult life reading lines written by someone else and pretending to be someone else might be an idiot when she goes off script?
markm at January 30, 2015 2:43 PM
That's right up there with "oil pulling". No, swishing oil around in your mouth for 10 minutes is NOT going to pull the toxins from your body. It's just going to give you oily teeth. Ick.
momof4 at January 30, 2015 7:25 PM
Um...this is mild compared to vaginal bleaching to make your pussy pinker and fillers in your G-spot. Yes fillers like the kind people inject in their faces.
Ppen at January 30, 2015 7:35 PM
Someday Gwyneth Paltrow will be recognized as a great satirists, which she intends to be or not.
moobly at January 30, 2015 7:52 PM
Amy Alkon
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2015/01/30/sorry_gwyneth_b.html#comment-5817161">comment from KevinThanks, Kevin. We please to aim.
Amy Alkon at January 30, 2015 10:46 PM
I should be given an atta boy for avoiding the steamed clam joke.
Wut? oh.
I R A Darth Aggie at January 31, 2015 7:53 AM
mucus plug that sits at the top of the vagina
For any guy who's reluctant about, but considering, going down on a woman, this would probably help make up his mind.
JD at January 31, 2015 1:20 PM
I seriously long for a world where stupidity has mass.
lujlp at January 31, 2015 9:03 PM
"I seriously long for a world where stupidity has mass."
And THAT is why I won't return to the Catholic church. I won't. I won't do it.
Gog_Magog_Carpet_Reclaimers at February 1, 2015 1:40 PM
If a guy had thought of this, he'd be attacked as a misogynist pervert.
Cousin Dave at February 2, 2015 8:49 AM
Leave a comment