It saddens me that my dog (and more recently, my CAT) are better behaved than most kids today. I'm not even trying that hard. They still both know I'm the boss and in control of the resources.

Same here, Daghain.

...though, admittedly, after a week with Gregg, Aida needs a little behavioral reinforcement.

Last night, I was taking something to a neighbor and he needed her to get out of the kitchen and go sit on the couch. He told her to go up there (a command she knows and obeys). She just sat there and stared at him. I came in and told her to get up there and she scampered right up.

The man is dog mush and dogs know it.

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

Some Jewish guy

It goes with my comment about today's primary-school teachers, particularly those of the lower grades. They don't get into teaching because they want to teach second-graders; they get into teaching because they want to be a second-grader. In certain quarters of our society, there is a very strong desire to live a child-like life (and rely on government paternalism). This results in parents approaching children as peers. Inevitable results are inevitable.

Why else would you see millenials voting for government to take care of them?

Oh. Who is that? Hillary. Be consistent.

Over the past three decades, there has been a massive transfer of authority from parents to kids. Along with that transfer of authority has come a change in the valuation of kids' opinions and preferences. . . . what kids think and what kids like and what kids want now matters as much, or more, than what their parents think and like and want. . . . These well-intentioned changes have been profoundly harmful to kids.

Corporations today are so desperate to capture the youth market, they've foregone any product that isn't youth-oriented. All jeans are now skinny jeans. All shirts are slim fit.

Youth opinion is the only one that matters. Young tastes have become the standard.

We're selling our souls to sell our products to our children. Wisdom and taste advice from adults is mocked and derided.

Politicians are twisting themselves into knots to appeal to twenty-something voters.

With all this going on outside the house and parents surrendering control inside the house, why shouldn't the children feel they're in charge?

This obsession with the youth market started with the Baby Boom and now the Millennials are being courted.

Sax says kindergarten and first grade educators used to teach these basic rules--clean up your own mess, don't take things that aren't yours, say sorry when you hurt somebody, play fair, don't hit--but that such behavioral instruction has been supplanted by phonics and other academic lessons. With schools no longer inculcating these important and basic rules of behavior, parents are really on the hook. Instead, he argues, parents have abdicated their authority.

No, the parents abdicated their authority when they weren't the first to teach those basic rules. It has nothing to do with phonics, and parents should be on the damn hook for, you know, parenting.

From the way older women dress I dont think its just millenials that like the hipster tarte look.

Someone needs to teach American women Kim Kardashian is not a makeup look to be admired.

Ugh...this is so my life right now. I have custody of 16 year twins (boy and girl). These kids are clueless about the basics. Mom just admitted to me last week that she was a lousy mom, who parented from arm's length and gave them "things" instead of you know, values and responsibilities. They essentially did whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted. I raised three daughters, who are all married and on their own and successful in their chosen careers. I thought I was done raising kids, and now here I am raising someone else's, and having to start with kids who are on the brink of being adults but who are completely unprepared for adulthood.

That said, they are actually pretty good kids and are eager to please. They're happy being with me and they have learned how to clean house, do their own laundry, to take responsibility for themselves and their actions and be a contributing member to something greater than themselves. I'm still working with them on some of the basics, like turning lights and electronics off when they aren't in use. But they are much further ahead of the game then when they first came to live with me in September.

The best part of my time with them is that they're learning what it's like to actually belong in a family unit where everyone has to work together for the success of the entire team. These poor kids would get left home alone, with just a neighbor or a friend to look in on them while mom and step-dad took vacations all over the country. It's been a dog-eat-dog existence for them. I'm pretty proud of them for where they are today vs. where they were 9 months ago. They are thriving in a home that has rules and boundaries, it was obvious that they needed that structure and authority. They were emotionally about 12 when they moved in so it was a huge adjustment for me. I look at where my kids were at that age, and I'm working to get them there as quickly as I can, without breaking their spirit in the process.

So for all the asshole parents out there that want to capitulate to your kids, I say F you. Someone, somewhere is going to be stuck dealing with the problem you created because you wanted to be your kid's friend instead of their parent. And for all the adults that run the world - stop giving in to every tantrum and demand that these kids make - you're not doing them any favors!

You beat me to it, Kevin.

Why SHOULD teachers have to spend their precious time on non-academic matters? I'm amazed that Leonard Sax would talk like that - unless it was taken out of context. I seem to remember that when "Ramona the Pest" was published in 1968, no one thought it was weird that the kindergarten teacher expected Ramona to stay at home until she could stop pulling one girl's hair. Why SHOULDN'T she expect parents to train their children that well, In Advance?

Two wise people said, years ago (guess who):

"...parents send kids to school expecting teachers to teach kids manners, morals, etc., and teachers send kids back every day expecting parents to teach them the three Rs. It seems a trade embargo is in order."

And, from 1990:

"...yes, she would be grateful for more help in the teaching of manners. That is why, when parents complain that somebody should be teaching their children manners, she agrees that somebody should, and then stares hard at them through her lorgnette."

Also, a fun 2012 thread from Bratfree on public schools:

http://www.refugees.bratfree.com/read.php?2,180909,180913

You can read the second column here:

https://news.google.com/newspapers?nid=1298&dat=19900116&id=eYIwAAAAIBAJ&sjid=xIsDAAAAIBAJ&pg=2733,2433602&hl=en

Another excerpt:

"...No classroom can provide such practice. Even to maintain a school code of behavior, to establish an orderly atmosphere in which learning is possible, the schools need the reinforcement of the community. Support for indecent dress, obscene language and lack of respect for others, as an expression of student rights, is not helpful..."

Sara, major props to you for taking that on. I don't think I could do it at this point.