I believe I found something worthy of recognition. I think I found the very worst song ever.

You may remember this effusive crap that was so popular in the early eighties. What you may not know is that the song was originally intended for a guy to sing, with some variation on the lyrics.

Why Howard Keel would taint his otherwise perfectly legitimate career by finding and performing this variation, which might have otherwise not been heard, is beyond me. (Although The Temptations also did this version, which, surprisingly, was actually passable.)

A friend of mine and I taunt each other on Twitter by sending each other videos of the horrific songs we hear on the grocery store muzak. (The Bangles tends to get exchanged a lot, for instance.) Then I sent him this, explaining I heard the female version at the grocery store.

His response? "Oh, fuck a warthog in the nostril! That is horrendous!"

So, without further ado, the worst song ever.

Hey, this ain't Chicago, Jake.

https://pjmedia.com/instapundit/255917/

The Canadian option.

My most agitated liberal friend sent me a link today about Justin Trudeau announcing Canada would take all of the Trump-banned immigrants because diversity is their strength. My friend said that was an example of real leadership.

...

Canada also gives us a test case to compare to America’s plan. In five years we can check back and see how it turned out for them. If it worked, we can reassess. Until then we obviously need to wall-off Canada. But that’s another topic.

Now that I think about it, the Middle East has a lot of space too. Remind me again why Muslim countries are banning Muslim immigrants. Is it because they are Hitler?

http://blog.dilbert.com/post/156544714786/the-canadian-option

Oh, Gov. Moonbeam...

http://dailycaller.com/2017/01/29/flashback-when-liberal-democrats-opposed-refugees-and-even-orphans/

Moonbeam, part II. First, secession talk, now this?

http://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/2017/01/27/california-could-cut-off-feds-in-response-to-trump-threats/

Paying cash for health care.

What happens when doctors only take cash? The lucrative field of medicine gets demystified, prices go down, services go up, and everybody except insurance companies come out ahead. Paying cash on the barrel head isn't the full limit of how to increase the quality of medical care while driving prices down, but it's an essential part of any serious reform that doesn't simply involve rationing the quantity of care. Different conditions apply (obviously) for emergency situations, but those sorts of costs are exactly what real insurance—as opposed to the pre-payment plans we effectively call "insurance"—are designed to cover.

http://reason.com/blog/2017/01/27/what-happens-when-doctors-only-take-cash

Why not join Mexico? or are you...wait for it...racist?

http://www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/politics/should-california-oregon-and-washington-join-canada-calexit-talk-envelops-west-coast/

Well, Dave Barry's fans voted "MacArthur Park" as the Worst Song Ever, as you may remember.

I had never heard either song before. But while I've enjoyed Howard Keel and his singing in his movies, this arrangement definitely sounded off. And the comments were interesting too.

At any rate, here's Donna Summer, singing the other song.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6H0BD2eWIww

(Though her voice, at least, sounds better than Keel did at that time.)

This is funny, but the only version of that song I'd ever heard is Weird Al Yankovick's version, "Jurassic Park is Fright'ning in the Dark."

Holy shit, that's a real song? Awful, awful awful.

And the lyrics are so bad, they're hilarious.

"MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark.
All the sweet, green icing flowing down.
Someone left the cake out in the rain.
I don't think that I can take it,
'Cause it took so long to bake it,
And I'll never have that recipe again!"

Hollywood hasn't figured it out yet, but it's dead.

Netflix, Amazon, and others produce content at a fraction of the cost of Hollywood, produce more original content, and use data and analytics to target that content to an audience. They're not reliant on networks, theaters, and distribution companies to get their content to audiences. And their content is viewable on demand, beholden to no schedule.

Looks like civil asset forfeiture is up for review in Texas.

https://www.alec.org/article/lone-star-state-poised-to-consider-civil-asset-forfeiture-reform/

Something to keep in mind:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Coulter%27s+Law

And here's another instance of the laws are for the little people:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/01/30/iraq-human-rights-lawyer-accused-hounding-british-troops-thought/

CNN teaches you how to make a Hallmark Moment:

https://twitter.com/whitereddit/status/825522881127968768

Fun column:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/style/ask-amy-dating-dude-proves-hes-no-clooney/2017/01/27/46846d40-df92-11e6-918c-99ede3c8cafa_story.html?utm_term=.7188123e222a#comments

Dear Amy: When two people meet and the guy wants to have sex, why is it that many women say, “I am not that kind of girl, and I need to get to know you better”?

That is actually a big lie that women tell. After all, if the guy who wanted to have sex with them was George Clooney, it’s unthinkable that they would say to him, “I’m not that kind of girl.”

Every woman is “that kind of girl” with a select few men under the right circumstances. When women say this, what they actually mean is, “I am not that kind of girl with you.”

Why can’t they just say the following: “I have enjoyed our evening, and, although I appreciate your sexual attraction toward me, I do not feel the same way; however, I wish you well in your future endeavors.”

What is wrong with saying something as honest and as heartfelt as that?

I call women on this all the time on dates, and they are speechless, because they know I have caught them in a lie. Suffice to say, I have no interest in a second date, and I move on.

I find this line of thinking disingenuous. Any thoughts?

Sam from Los Angeles
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Amy's answer is good - but check out the top-rated comments as well!

I won't spoil the best ones, but here are two, lower down:
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LisaWhite1
6:03 AM EST
why is it that many women say, “I am not that kind of girl, and I need to get to know you better”?

1. Because it's true, imagine that.
2. Because they're not attracted to you and are trying to let you down easy.
3. Because you come off as a jerk who thinks that paying for one dinner entitles him to sex.

Aquawoman
8:11 AM EST
4. Because making it personal (I'm not attracted to you, Sam) may subject them to angry tirades from men and make them feel unsafe.
________________________________________

On top of everything else, people need to remember that 1) most cases of herpes don't even get diagnosed, and 2) condoms don't protect against herpes that well, so 3) you don't blame anyone for demanding that you with them go to THEIR doctor for a full check-up. That usually doesn't happen after the first or even third date.

Where were the tears in 2015 when Schumer called for a ban on Syrian refugees?

http://www.foxnews.com/health/2017/01/30/british-group-to-avoid-offending-patients-don-t-use-term-expectant-mother.html

I'm not sure you can even say "Have a good day." anymore.

"IRA Darth Aggie," if California offends you so, why do you live here?