Seriously? Just turn your phone on silent when you go to bed and respond to any texts when you wake up, or whenever is convenient. It really is that simple.

And giving your work number to a guy you just started dating seems a little too eager/pushy to me. Maybe it's generational, but I wouldn't feel comfortable calling someone's work phone unless it was an emergency or I knew them really, really well--your guy may feel the same. Plus realistically if he's working then he probably doesn't time to call to chat in the middle of the day. So expecting someone to call you at work during working hours may be unreasonable--just stick with the texting for now.

I've told him repeatedly I'd like to talk during daylight hours

Then don't talk to him during non-daylight hours. Or, at the very least, ask him why he insists on texting you late at night when you've asked him not to. If he has a legitimate reason he can't talk earlier, he should be able to tell you. If he can't contact you any other time, you still don't have to return every text if you need to be asleep. He may not be entirely manipulative, just clueless. You've actually trained him pretty well: he knows when to contact you so you'll respond. Sure, you've said you don't like to text late, but you do it anyway, so why should he think you really mean it? Your mouth says "I won't put up with this," but the way you roll over says "Pet me, I'm a lapdog."

I also wonder about the nature of the texts. Is it really him who keeps the conversation going for so long, or do you prolong it to get some of his limited attention?

I don't understand why people text when you're both available. Texting is what you do when you need to leave a message. When you're able to correspond, you save time by actually dialing a number and speaking.

(Are you looking to be somebody's girlfriend or Pavlov's dog?)

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

"If he can't swing that, let him call the sort of woman who'll pick up the phone for a man at any hour "

Sounds like he already found her.

My question is: have they had sex and how often does this lead to sweet nothings of sexting online? To some guys, the idea of a woman in bed is quite a turn on. Then again, same with some girls. Does milady protest too much if she can't find a damned off switch...on the phone and the guy?

Either he's involved with somebody else or he just enjoys pushing your buttons. Either way, you're being played.

Clearly he isn't free to text her until after his wife has gone to sleep.

This LW reminds of a guy who wrote a book on President Lincoln, that contained an unfortunate passage to the effect that Lincoln had arrived for his inauguration in D.C. by airplane, and not train.

I favor the vampire theory except for one thing. No self-respecting vampire watches Judge Judy.

Is this letter for real? It's amazing how many people have zero common sense. LW: turn off the damned phone, get a good night's sleep, and stop ruminating over someone who rarely contacts you. How do you get him to call during the day?.... i would say the bigger question is this: why do you continue pursue someone who is just not that into you?

Your behavior in continuing to text him this late at night is telling him his behavior is just fine and dandy with you. There is no law or rule that says you have to answer a text NOW! If it was really important he would call you. So turn off your phone when you go to bed and get your sleep. Answer your texts in the morning when you are awake and have a few minutes.

Another consideration for texting back in the morning, his wife deserves to see him texting someone else so she can kick his cheating ass out of the house.

Texting "late at night" isn't inherently a bad sign. I think we're picturing him sending texts at 3 in the morning, but the LW says herself that she goes to bed early and receives the texts right as she's about to go to bed, which could easily be 10, 11, or even 9:30 at night. Hardly an indecent hour, especially if LW's guy is a night owl with a different definition of "late" or has a busy schedule that doesn't permit him much downtime before then. (How many people have time to pick up the phone and chat with a girl they're casually dating during the middle of the workday?) Not to mention that LW has basically conditioned him to think that whatever time he texts is in fact a great time to text her; after all, she responds every time!

Reading between the lines, I'm guessing that she's insecure enough about his interest that she thinks he'll disappear if she doesn't respond promptly to every text. Which may happen, but at least then you know he was just texting you out of boredom and you can move on. Whereas he's genuinely interested then he shouldn't have a problem making the miniscule amount of effort it takes to text when you're actually awake.

Of course, there's always the possibility that this guy isn't into texting period and these are just "Good night honey, sweet dreams" texts that she's stretching into 20 minute conversations. If so--chill out!