Joe Paterno To Be Made A Saint

Did you hear that the TSA agents are to sainted?

Yea though I Fly Through the Valley of Death ..I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing!
(Sign over the entrance to the old SR-71 operating base Kadena, Japan).
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You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.
(Paul F. Crickmore -test pilot)
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The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.
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Blue water Navy truism: There are more planes in the ocean than submarines in the sky.
(From an old carrier sailor)
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If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it's probably a helicopter -- and therefore, unsafe
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When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.
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Without ammunition, the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.
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What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?
If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up, ...the pilot dies.
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Never trade luck for skill.
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The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are
"Why is it doing that?" "Where are we?" and "Oh Shit!"
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Weather forecasts are horoscopes with numbers.
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Progress in airline flying: now a flight attendant can get a pilot pregnant.
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Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.
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A smooth landing is mostly luck; two in a row is all luck; three in a row is prevarication.
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I remember when sex was safe and flying was dangerous.
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Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left one up there!
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Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries
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Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.
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When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten. Just remember, if you crash because of weather, your funeral will be held on a sunny day.
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Advice given to RAF pilots during WWII When a prang (crash) seems inevitable, endeavor to strike the softest, cheapest object in the vicinity as slow and gently as possible.
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The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; ...it can just barely kill you.
(Attributed to Max Stanley, Northrop test pilot)

This is the best thing you will ever read.

You liked it? OK, here's Part two of two. It includes one of the finest hammerdrops in the English language: Their milieu is postadolescent.

There are much, much more important things in life than being smart.