Welcome To Helicopter Parenting: "Weekly Walk To School Day"
We used to call this "every day in real life," because I walked to Bond elementary school, about a half mile away, every day, all by myself.
From an article in the Metrowest Daily News:
Before joining Farley School's Walk to School Wednesday group, fourth-grader Brianna Moran and second-grader Lila Chaves knew each other from their neighborhood and school, but they hadn't considered themselves friends.While taking the one-mile journey from the Gates Avenue neighborhood to Farley Elementary School each Wednesday for the past few weeks, Moran and Chaves began talking and eventually building a friendship.
Moran and Chaves' friendship is just one of a handful of new ones that sprouted up among the students who do the one-mile walk to Farley Elementary School each Wednesday, but also the parents who accompany their children.
"The parents in the neighborhood get to reconnect," said Liz Jackson, a mother of three Farley students.
After Farley School held a walk to school day last spring, Jackson rounded up parents and Farley students in her neighborhood to start a weekly walk to school day to provide children with exercise before the school day. At its peak, the group has had 28 walkers.
via @IAMMGraham who tweeted, "We used to call them 'normal school day(s).'"
I never walked to school. It was more fun to ride my purple Stingray bike, on the road.
tmitsss at October 17, 2013 7:09 AM
This is so true. I am in my 8th year as a crossing guard and am happy to say that all the kids who live close to the school either walk or bike everyday. Those kids are always awake and happy when they get to school. The kids in the cars always look tired or like they are going to an execution. Not too many mother hens around here either which is also nice.
sheepmommy at October 17, 2013 7:15 AM
While I see where the "this used to be every normal day" type comments are coming from, I also think they are lacking some understanding...
As a parent, if I let my kid walk or bike to school alone before the age of 8 or 9 (3-4th grade), I will get a visit from Child Protection Services. Some folks would call foul even after that, but before that, CPS would definitely get involved.
Remember that parents are regularly admonished things like, "Never leave your infant in a car unattended for even a second - ANYTHING could happen!" Yes, Elvis could walk up and turn into a flamingo, but if one puts the baby in the car in the winter and walks the shopping cart to the cart-return two spots away, what is actually likely to happen? Probably, the baby will fall asleep or wake up. BUT, the hysterics would have you believe that some stranger will unlock your car and steal your infant in those 12 seconds - even if there's nobody in a 100 foot radius of the car when you step away. Forget the fact that even seasoned parents take a full minute to get a child in or out of a car seat!
So, while I understand the gripe that this shouldn't be special, I think blaming the parents for helicoptering isn't really the right place to put blame. Most are doing what they have to in order to not have legal troubles. As for the ones walking WITH their kids who are older... some are probably doing it to spend time with the other adults in the neighborhood (a good thing!). Many are likely doing it because walking near schools has gotten much more dangerous due to the vastly increased number of kids being dropped off via car. When it was walkers, bikers, and buses only, walking or biking was a LOT safer!
So, if anyone is to blame it is the fear mongers - including government officials.
Shannon M. Howell at October 17, 2013 7:18 AM
The after school care for my 10 year old won't let him walk home on his own, even though we live 2 blocks away. Too dangerous, apparently!
Snoopy at October 17, 2013 7:36 AM
So, if anyone is to blame it is the fear mongers - including government officials.
This. Before CPS, kids could pretty much go anywhere and do anything short of getting arrested before the parents were investigated. And even then, not so much. Because also, back then, other kids' parents were pretty much allowed to discipline other kids who they saw getting out of hand. I remember the principal of our grade school (k-8 back then, none of this "middle school" shite) had a large wooden paddle on the wall of his office, with the words "Board of Education" etched on it. And yes, he would use it on you if you got in serious trouble. And then your parents would inflict their punishment, whatever it was. "Spare the rod and spoil the child" is quite true. Even though CPS was initially originated to investigate child abuse, in their eyes now damn near everything is child abuse. Not to mention that people can call CPS anonymously and make a complaint, whether or not there is abuse going on. And CPS will send someone to investigate. They have to play the CYA game, just in case.
Flynne at October 17, 2013 7:48 AM
@Flynne
What if the blind acceptance of nanny state governance that is so rampant these days is the result of the "whoever hits the hardest makes the rules" culture you're so fervently proposing as the solution?
I'd rather teach my children to be independent and to question authority, instead meekly going along with whichever perceived authority figure has the biggest paddle on his wall.
Chris Rhodes at October 17, 2013 8:02 AM
We know so much now, we can't function. We hear about every abduction, every lost child, and it sounds like an epidemic. CNN runs a report about an event in Seattle, and parents in Pennsylvania hold their children closer.
And what's worse, the people who don't even HAVE kids chime in with their opinions.
Nobody goes out to play, nobody goes exploring for hours, nobody takes risks. For good or bad - everybody's safe, but nobody knows how to deal with the outside.
Vinnie Bartilucci at October 17, 2013 8:36 AM
@Chris
I hope you're not my cousin Chris Rhodes, because if you were, you would know that the "whoever hits the hardest makes the rules" culture you're so fervently proposing as the solution is absolutely NOT what I was proposing. All I was saying is back in the day, BEFORE it became a crime to discipline your child with a swat on the behind, that is was NORMAL for children to walk or bike to school and that children who misbehaved were disciplined more acutely than they are now. A beating with a paddle is NOT a solution, but when my girls were little and one of them got away from and ran across the street, one good swift swat on her (well-padded) behind was sufficient enough to let her know I was displeased and that she should NOT run into the street again without looking. Way to misconstrue what I posted.
Flynne at October 17, 2013 8:50 AM
@ Chris again,
How old are you, anyway? I'm 55 and it is not unusual for people my age to have been paddled on the butt when they were kids, as a form of punishment. Usually in addition to being grounded. Depending on the severity of the infraction. One of my friends' moms used a wooden spoon on her kids' butts, until it broke.
I'm not advocating beatings, far from it. But when you let kids get away with too much, and you allow people you don't know to get into your business on "suspected abuse" just because some other asshats are abusive and need to be regulated, the nanny state has won. And I DO teach my girls "to be independent and to question authority", as I have done pretty much most of my life. And the "authority" I question the most is that of the nanny state. I'm a card-carrying member of the NRA, and have my permit but I'm not going around shooting everyone in sight just because they don't agree with me. You have to temper your judgement with knowledge, and when I KNOW the nanny state is wrong, that's the judgement call I make. How people discipline their kids should be a private issue, unless there is blatant abuse going on. My brothers and I were not abused, but we sure knew when we were in trouble. And the punishment usually fit the crime. We are not mal-adjusted because we were punished. Quite the contrary.
Flynne at October 17, 2013 8:59 AM
"So, while I understand the gripe that this shouldn't be special, I think blaming the parents for helicoptering isn't really the right place to put blame. Most are doing what they have to in order to not have legal troubles. "
The problem is, a lot of those same parents fully support the politicians and policies that create those troubles. Most parents that I've come into contact with are in full support of zero-tolerance policies, until it gets their child. But even then, instead of taking the lesson learned and arguing for policy changes, they just go about begging/threatening for an exception their child. They're still fine with the policy being applied to other peoples' children.
"Many are likely doing it because walking near schools has gotten much more dangerous due to the vastly increased number of kids being dropped off via car. "
Back in the day, the schools tried to separate the car riding and pedestrian traffic. One school I went to was designed with separate entrances and exits for car riders and walkers. The walkers' exit fed directly into sidewalks that led the walking kids away from the vehicle entrance. Another school let walkers leave ten minutes early, so they could clear out before the waiting car traffic started moving.
Cousin Dave at October 17, 2013 9:50 AM
Speaking of who GETS to walk with kids - not to mention the hysterical fear of strangers:
https://www.nationalparentsorganization.org/blog/21244-fathers-to-walk-or-not-to-walk-that-is-the-question
(The parts about stranger hysteria are from the U.K., but they could just as easily have happened in the U.S.)
Excerpt:
Robert Franklin: "I think it’s a good idea for the dads to walk the kids to school. And I think it’s fine for them to commit time to their children’s school activities. But, like all such concepts and all such organizations, there’s a lot that’s wrong with their underlying assumptions. Most importantly, the organization assumes the fathers and mothers are either married or in some sort of ongoing relationship that allows the dads to walk their sons and daughters to school. That, of course, is a great leap of faith. The fact is that something like half of those fathers are divorced or separated from the mothers. That means there’s a court order telling them when they can and can’t see their children. And I know of no standard order that gives a father visitation on Monday morning, i.e. the first day of classes. Fathers are rarely the custodial parent and that means they see their children only on weekends and maybe one night during the week. Not much of a chance to walk your kid to school, right?"
lenona at October 17, 2013 11:37 AM
One of the biggest issues with walking to school is simply logistics. I lived less than a quarter mile from my high school, and walked every day. But I lived 3-4 miles from my elementary and middle schools, in a rural area with no sidewalks, so walking to school would have involved walking along the shoulder of a high-traffic road during rush hour then crossing at busy intersections. It would take an adult over an hour on a good day, and a kid with a 30 pound backpack, instrument, and science project? Forget about it.
Shannon at October 18, 2013 11:31 AM
Shannon: why does that backpack weigh 30 pounds?
The guys that sent Apollo to the Moon didn't carry that much.
Is your kid doing more than that?
Radwaste at October 20, 2013 7:52 AM
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